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10/26/2011 - Re-Orientation

posted Oct 26, 2011, 7:16 PM by Kelli Daniels
    Matt and I ran together again tonight and no one got hit by a car this time.  Success.  We ran one of my favorite routes that goes through Mass Ave, the city's artsy/hippie area, and the Old Northside, which has a lot of the city's famous historical homes and beautiful Victorian architecture.  One of these days I'm going to do some more exploring in the Old Northside.  I know it connects to the Monon somewhere and I think I could make some more good routes with it.

    In other news, I found out that BoMF Indianapolis is having "Orientation 2.0" in a few weeks.  Recently there have been a couple of rather upsetting relapses on the BoMF teams in Indianapolis.  Relapsing means not only being kicked off the BoMF team, but also being kicked out of the housing facilities.  So, for people like me, who don't really have any personal experience in dealing with the complex issues of addiction, recovery, and relapse, there are a lot of questions.  It's confusing for me because I've only ever seen the guys who show up at practice at 5:30 every morning and give me hugs and joke around.  I don't have any experience with the other sides of the guys.  The sides that got them to the Progress House in the first place.  In my mind, that's a whole different person, so I don't know how to reconcile the two.  

    Sometimes it's hard for me to know where I fit into the res guys' life journeys.  I am not a counselor or a therapist.  I know I'm not there to help them dig through their baggage and deal with their pasts.  Honestly, I feel like it's not really any of my business.  If any of them want to talk to me about anything, I'd be happy to listen, but I don't really ask questions.  I know some of them have been in jail, but I don't want to bring it up if it's not something they feel like talking about.  I know some of them have tried and failed at getting clean and sober more than once, but I don't feel the need to draw attention to that.  The way I approach it is that I am just a teammate.  Some teammates get closer than others and some end up sharing really personal details and information while some don't.  I'm not going to force relationships and conversations just like I wouldn't on any other team.  I really care about the people on my BoMF team and I hope that if they ever feel like they want to share something with me that they will feel comfortable enough to do so.

    Orientation 2.0 will be a presentation with a few speakers to answer questions about these issues and how our relationships through BoMF can be important.  I think it's nice of the BoMF staff to put this together and I am really looking forward to it.  I think it will help me get a fuller picture of where I fit in and what role I play in these men's changing lives.  I am aware that because of my (fortunate) lack of experience with addiction and recovery and homelessness, I don't know a lot more than I do know, and I'm hoping to learn more.