What is Sexaholics Anonymous?
Sexaholics Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength, and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover.
The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop lusting and become sexually sober. There are no dues or fees for SA membership; we are self-supporting through our own contributions.
SA is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization, or institution; does not wish to engage in any controversy; neither endorses nor opposes any causes.
Our primary purpose is to stay sexually sober and help others to achieve sexual sobriety.*
Sexaholics Anonymous is a recovery program based on the principles of Alcoholics Anonymous and received permission from AA to use its Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions in 1979.
*Adapted with permission from The AA Grapevine, Inc.
SA adaptation © 1982, 1989, 2001 SA Literature.
Sexaholics Anonymous has two features that make it different from most other sex-related fellowships. First, SA has a specific definition of sobriety, rather than asking members to determine their own definition. In SA, a person is sober today if he/she has not had sex with him/herself or a partner other than a spouse. Second, SA sees lust as the driving force behind our sexual acting out. In SA, members start by getting sober and then seek progressive victory over lust. This means working one day at a time to stop the obsessive thinking and looking that leads to acting out.
SA members come from all walks of life, with a wide variety of compulsive sexual behaviours - ranging from compulsive masturbation to prostitution and from pornography to dependent relationships. In some cases the behaviour is extreme. The common thread is an obsession with sex to the extent that normal life has become unmanageable. In effect, the sexaholic has lost control, no longer has the power of choice and is not free to stop their sellf-destructive behaviour.
SA does not claim to solve these problems, merely that members presenting these symptoms have been able to stop for open-ended periods of time by working the SA programme of recovery. Also, SA has no opinion as to whether people with these kind of problems are sexaholics or not.
SA recovery starts with stopping the particular sexual behaviour(s). After "getting sober" members follow a series of personal activities known as the Twelve Steps in order to recover. They are adapted from the original Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. These "Steps" involve: admitting there is a problem, seeking help, self-appraisal, confidential self-disclosure, making amends where harm has been done and working with other sexaholics who want to recover. Central to the programme is the idea of a "spiritual awakening" emphasising its practical value rather than its philosophical or metaphysical understanding.
There are no counsellors or therapists in SA, members meet at regular "meetings" where people share their own experience, strength and hope in overcoming their addiction. SA provides no vocational, legal, financial, psychiatric, medical or professional services.
What happens at an SA meeting?
Generally meetings last 1 hour and are held in public places such as a church or local community building. Members gather, there is usually some kind of reading from literature or a guest speaker may tell his/her story. After that members talk about how they relate to what has been read or said. People may also use the time to talk through some particular difficulty which may be troubling them.
No. SA has no religious affiliations. Although the recovery programme is "spiritual", it is essentially practical. SA members may include Atheists, Agnostics, Buddhists, Christians, Hindus, Jews, Muslims. In fact almost every denomination usually finds a connection.
Yes. SA meetings are often open to both men and women, married or single, gay or straight. Sometimes, in areas where SA is more developed, members have started "men's" and "women's" exclusive meetings.
Sexaholics Anonymous is entirely self-supporting from members' contributions. It is policy to turn down financial offers from external bodies or individuals.
No. One SA Tradition states that "SA has no opinion on outside issues; hence the SA name ought never be drawn into public controversy". There is nothing to stop an individual SA member expressing opinions on external issues, but no one can speak for SA.
SA has a tradition of co-operation rather than affiliation with the professional community. Sexaholics Anonymous welcomes the co-operation of those in government, the clergy, the helping professions and voluntary organisations. In turn SA is happy to co-operate with others interested in Sexaholics Anonymous by: providing information, speakers, literature and contact information about recovery through the SA fellowship. SA's non-sexaholic friends have been instrumental in helping SA to grow around the world.
Personal anonymity is the safeguard of each individual SA member. First names only are generally used at meetings.
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You can contact us at sasingapore@gmail.com.