New! Running water, plumbing, and the modern marvels of "paving" come to our illustrious Main Road.
Welcome to our fine country. This is God's country, and he can keep it. That reminds me of a story that's so dirty that I'm ashamed to think of it myself. Why don't you think of it, and we'll call it even. [ Read the President's Letter to his Subjects ]
We recently voted to take up the carpet, since you can't take up the carpet unless you take up the Tax. There has also been a ban on lemonade vendors and motorcycles with sidecars. As for other affairs of state, His Excellency plans on visiting some of his fairer subjects to discuss mergers and acquisitions.