Подготовка к ЕГЭ по английскому языку в Марьино и Люблино с репетитором.

замечательный педагог, чтобы его разозлить надо постараться, а этот Путин просто провокатор! Наш класс безумно уважал и любил репетитора

РЕПЕТИТОР ПО АНГЛИЙСКОМУ -

Репетитор английского языка, Москва

Подготовка к ЕГЭ по английскому в Марьино с репетитором.

Подготовка к ЕГЭ / ЕГ (опыт с 1990 г.), к собеседованию.

Быстрое и качественное изучение английского языка без зубрёжки.

Провожу подготовку к аттестации выпускников в форме ЕГЭ в Марьино и Люблино.

Занятия индивидуальные и в паре. Гибкая цена.

Подробнее ознакомиться с методикой преподавания и ценами

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Приложив минимум усилий, за очень короткое время Вы достигнете такого уровня владения языком, который позволит Вам выполнить любую задачу – будь то достижение высокого результата при сдаче стандартных американских или британских тестов, типа GMAT или SSAT, или поступление в престижный ВУЗ.
Вы преуспеете в ведении переговоров на английском языке, получите высокооплачиваемую работу, почувствуете себя уверенно за границей, а главное – получите удовольствие от уверенного владения языком.

Многолетний опыт обучения английскому иностранных студентов из разных стран в американских университетах, и использование самых эффективных материалов, высылаемых лучшими разработчиками – гарантия того, что Вы достигнете высокого результата быстро, а процесс обучения доставит удовольствие и радость.

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СТОИМОСТЬ ЗАНЯТИЙ

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Все необходимые материалы будут предоставлены бесплатно.

Какую бы задачу Вы перед собой ни ставили – поступление в российский или американский университет,
высокий результат при сдаче международного экзамена, подготовка к отъезду за рубеж, овладение бизнес-лексикой,
или самосовершенствование – цель будет достигнута с минимально возможными затратами времени и средств.

Тел. Репетитора в Москве 495-345 20 61.

Подробно - на сайте arepetitor.blogspot.com

А теперь - анекдоты...

The number twelve goes to a bar

A number twelve walks into a bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer.

"Sorry I can't serve you," states the barman.

"Why not?!" asks the number twelve with anger showing in its voice.

"You're under 18," replies the barman.

The story of a very short man

A man walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me two shots." Bartender says, "You want them both now or one at a time?" The guy says," Oh, I want them both now. One's for me and one's for this little guy here," and he pulls a tiny three inch man out of his pocket.

The bartender asks "He can drink?"

"Oh, sure. He can drink."

So the bartender pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks it all up.

"That's amazing" says the bartender. "What else can he do, can he walk?"

The man flicks a quarter down to the end of the bar and says, "Hey, Jake. Go get that." The little guy runs down to the end of the bar and picks up the quarter. Then he runs back down and gives it to the man.

The bartender is in total shock. "That's amazing" he says, "what else can he do? Does he talk?"

The man says "Sure he talks, hey, Jake, tell him about that time we were in Africa and you made fun of that witch doctor's powers!"

You looked a lot like my wife

A serious drunk walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her and kissed her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her."

"Why you worthless, insufferable, wretched, no good drunk!" she screamed.

"Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

He is a very fast drinker

A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says, "What'll it be buddy?"

The man says, "Set me up with seven whiskey shots and make them doubles." The bartender does this and watches the man slug one down, then the next, then the next, and so on until all seven are gone almost as quickly as they were served. Staring in disbelief, the bartender asks why he's doing all this drinking.

"You'd drink them this fast too if you had what I have."

The bartender hastily asks, "What do you have pal?"

The man quickly replies, "I have a dollar."

Making a bet at a bar

Two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on. It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal. "I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said the first guy. "Bet you $10 he won't," said the second guy.

Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge. The second guy hands the first guy the money.

"I can't take your money," said the first guy. "I cheated you. The same story was on the five o'clock news." "No, no. Take it," said the second guy. "I saw the five o'clock news too. I just didn't think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!"

Drunk orders himself a beer

A man walks into the front door of a bar. He is obviously drunk. he staggers up to the bar, seats himself on a stool, and with a belch, asks the bartender for a drink.

The bartender politely informs the man that it appears that he has already had plenty to drink--he could not be served additional liquor at this bar but could get a cab called for him.

The drunk is briefly surprised then softly scoffs, grumbles, climbs down off the bar stool, and staggers out the front door.

A few minutes later, the same drunk stumbles in the side door of the bar. He wobbles up to the bar and hollers for a drink. The bartender comes over, and still politely--but more firmly refuses service to the man due to his inebriation. Again, the bartender offers to call a cab for him.

The drunk looks at the bartender for a moment angrily, curses, and shows himself out the side door, all the while grumbling and shaking his head.

A few minutes later, the same drunk bursts in through the back door of the bar. He plops himself up on a bar stool, gathers his wits, and belligerently orders a drink.

The bartender comes over and emphatically reminds the man that he is clearly drunk, will be served no drinks, and either a cab or the police will be called immediately.

The surprised drunk looks at the bartender and in hopeless anguish, cries "Man! How many bars do you work at?"