Emily Post

Surfing the INTERNET

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"Emily Postnews Answers Your Questions on Netiquette"

Brad Templeton's (brad@looking.on.ca) satirical and hilarious piece on how NOT to behave on the net.  Emily Postnews, foremost authority on proper net behaviour, gives her advice.  There are many places to ftp this file, and it is appearing on many gophers.  One place to get the file is by
ftp to ra.msstate.edu (
Location:  /pub/docs/words- l/Funnies

The file is called emily.postnews.  Here is a sample:

"Dear Miss Postnews:
How long should my signature be?
-- verbose@noisy

A:  Dear Verbose:
Please try and make your signature as long as you can.   It's much more important than your article, of course, so try to have more lines of signature than actual text.   Try to include a large graphic made of ASCII characters, plus lots of cute quotes and slogans.   People will never tire of reading these pearls of wisdom again and again, and you will soon become personally associated with the joy each reader feels at seeing yet another delightful repeat of your signature.  Be sure
as well to include a complete map of USENET with each signature, to how how anybody can get mail to you from any site in the world. Be sure to include Internet gateways as well.  Also tell people on your own site how to mail to you.   Give independent addresses for Internet, UUCP, and BITNET, even if they're all the same."