Comedy

Technological Growth staggers..we often wonder why!
 
Following a news announcement in the EU last week, its now suggested that everyone use 'free online software, and pirate software everywhere you can. This revolutionary new theory was even taken to the EU parliament, paving the way for further reform.It's now acceptable to pirate movies,music and software. Analysts say that its just a matter of time before more software developers sign on to the lucrative benefits of 'free'. The understanding of this earthshattering new concept is a closely guarded secret, but in the light of the economic crisis it is punted to be one of the major economic forces driving new developments and possibly accounting for more than a 4.7% boost in GDP in some countries. USA was initially critical, but the latest round of trade talks could remove previous barriers to 'free' trade.'Attorneys reviewing the agreements say that 'the devil is in the details', but are confident that the economic spinoffs will outweigh an opposition to proposed new bills, which could be in effect by early 2010.

 

Microsoft has already come on board with the new plan, and will be hosting other browsers on its platform shortly. Other software developers are said to be skeptical, but the 29% fall in Microsoft shares is not enough to convince skeptics. Sources close to the inner circle say that a 50% fall in shares will most likely bring skeptics onboard with the new plan, it being that 29% was obviously a figure that left a sour taste in the mouths of some and was not nearly enough to convince some of the expansive tax benefits. The real challenge for Microsoft, will be to drop by 75% within the next 4 quarters. Analysts say this could be quite a task, considering the size of Microsoft, but smaller developers within the embroidery,textile and related development sectors can easily accomplish this task. The expected job cuts are said to be welcomed, in fact one employee soon to be a direct beneficiary of the new scheme, was quoted as saying 'I can't believe my dream of spending unlimited time with my family is actually becoming a reality. For far too long, we have fought against the payment system, and I for one firmly believe that 'free' is the way to go.' AP has not released the name of this outspoken critic of the norm of earning, due to his secretive appointment to A.S.S ( Amalgamated Software Syndicate). The announcement is said to be made public, following the new round of trade talks.

 

China, which has an estimated 98% piracy rate on Windows operating systems has been outspoken on the issue. In the latest US/China trade talks, President Obama has been outspoken, saying the new dawn is 'collaboration', not 'confrontation' . Whitehouse officials have been quick to point out that patents and copyrights have really been stifling growth, but the latest figures indicate that with rapid removal, GDP could even boost as much as 5%. An unidentified source, said that Windows was by far the most popular operating system, and although other software developers do not enjoy the same  high piracy rates, a collaborative effort could ensure more level playing fields by as early as 2011. Removal of such barriers will firmly entrench the new era of technology and innovation, and the advent of 'free' software throughout the industry could see thousands of professionals rush to the newfound levels of productivity, leaving possibly a severe dent in the current job market. The benefits of fathers being home with their families on a fulltime basis immediately ensures better family structures.China has given its unwavering committment to the practice that's actually been active in China for many years now. Two Chinese diplomats, convicted in the early 90's of sharing this economic tool with the West, will be freed in what might be termed an execution of good faith.

 

President Obama himself has declined to comment any further, but in an apparent moment of banter, said that although flyswatting is more his forte', it cannot be argued that the latest in collaborative efforts with China , in all levels of software development will easily ensure the expansion of the trade deficit, which he says is healthy for the economy, because we are sure of 'movement'. When asked if he could shed any light on the darkness surrounding the details of the latest collaborative efforts, he was happy to say 'Yes, we can!'.

Not to be outdone, the Chinese premier said 'Change' is what you have left, after we have spent your dollar! President Obama smiled, and said 'Good yuan, good yuan!'
 
©Nevi 2009
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