23: Always Something There to Remind Me

My hair has been growing back for a while now. I have eyebrows and eyelashes again (woo-hoo!!), and the hair on my head is short, but it's there.  With my hair growing back, I feel that I'm losing some of that "chemo patient" look (although my short hair is still a bit of a give-away). More noticeable to me, however, is the stupid port. I'm hoping that I can have it taken out shortly after my last chemo treatment. It's something I notice every time I look in the mirror. For now, it's a part of me, but I'll be glad when I can have it removed!!

But more about the hair...Last night, my SO was nice enough to give me my second buzz cut. The first time was when my hair started falling out several months ago and I was shedding so much that I decided it would be easier to shed short hair than to leave it long. Last night, it just needed to be evened out a bit. Another side effect of chemo that I didn't know previously: When your hair starts growing back in, it is not uncommon for the hair on your face and neck to grow in thicker. The hair on my face and neck was still very light and fine, but there was just a LOT of it. I looked like some very, very fuzzy peach. Eventually, I took the advice of Dr. Google and used the clippers to trim it all, and since then, it has been growing in normally.

I have to say this: Kudos to my SO for everything he's done for me. Not everyone would be willing to shave the back of his girlfriend's neck, change numerous bandages after I had my port put in, and again after I had surgery, give me shots to help increase my white blood cell counts after chemo, and just be there when I get frustrated with feeling sick or not having the cognitive wherewithal I once did. This from someone who could have easily walked away from having to deal with any of this. (And I wouldn't have blamed him.) He has been, and continues to be, my main source of support. 

In addition to everything at home, he has been picking up extra responsibilities at work because I can't be there full-time. I know he's worn out - I can see how incredibly worn out he is. Even with all of the stress, both from work and my illness, he has managed to keep me laughing. I figure that as long as he and I can both still laugh about things, then things will be okay. 













My new hair (and haircut!) (left), and the dreaded port (middle & right)



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