Made In Britain



	   	INT. COURT - DAY

				POLICE OFFICER

		Mr. Shahnawaz saw Trevor throw a brick
		through his lounge window. Mr. Shahnawaz
		was treated by his doctor for a cut he
		received, but was later able to identify
		Trevor when he was apprehended and 
		arrested by the police. Trevor was charged
		at Ratman Street Police station at 9:45
		p.m. When asked if he had anything to say,	
		he made no reply.

				JUDGE
		
		Do you have any questions on the facts,
		Mr. Whiteman?

				WHITEMAN

		No questions, your honour.

				JUDGE

		Thank you.

				JUDGE

		Were you aware that Mr. Shahnawaz had to
		be treated for a wound you inflicted upon
		him?

				TREVOR

		Yeah.

				JUDGE

		Stand up! You do not invite leniency, do
		you?
		
				TREVOR
		
		No.
		
				JUDGE

		You are a constant truant at school, a 
		failure, it seems. You've been before
		the court on numerous occasions for non-	
		attendance; you have been convicted of
		taking and driving away, shoplifting, 
		violent behaviour, and in spite of your
		undertakings to the court, you have made
		no attempt to secure yourself a job. And
		now you've been accused of stealing once
		again, and you've attacked a member of
		the immigrant community, & caused damage
		to his property. It's a long, depressing
		list. Are you not ashamed of yourself?

				TREVOR

		No.  

		INT. HARRY PARKER'S CAR - DAY

				HARRY

		You are currently under way to the Hooper
		Street Residential Assessment Centre.
		'Residential' means a place where you
		reside, live. You will reside, live at
		Hooper Street for a period of 6 weeks; 
		Which means you'll probably end up in	
		there for about 6 months. While a team
		of experts - psychiatrists and 
		psychologists, team leaders, key workers
		 - decide what they think should be done 
		with you. That is called assessment. Then
		you go back in front of His Nibs, for		
		nicking the cassettes from Harrods, he
		reads the experts' reports and then
		sentences you to be hanged. You got that?

				TREVOR

		What did I get for the cassettes?

				HARRY 

		You don't listen do you, you're all the
		bloody same! Today, was the brick through
		the Paki's window. They made a balls-up.
		You got to go back for the cassettes from
		Harrods, that's when he'll decide what to
		do with you.

				TREVOR

		You in a bad mood, Harry?

				HARRY

		You think you'll get away with it?

				TREVOR
		
		What?

				HARRY
	
		What?! Nicking from Harrods!

				TREVOR

		Why not?

				HARRY

		Was it full of skinheads the day you
		went, was it?

				TREVOR

		It was full of wogs.

				HARRY

		How many other skinheads did you see
		during that week at the shop?

				TREVOR

		It was full of wogs, why not me?

		Wankers!!

				HARRY  

		You heard what he said, no more chances.
		Get back in front of him, and he'll put
		you away.

				TREVOR

		Bollocks, I'll kick the door down.

				HARRY

		It's not worth it, Trevor. They'll lock
		you up.

				TREVOR

		They can't lock me up for not getting a
		job.

				HARRY

		Uh-huh? Try 'em and see.
				
				TREVOR

		You still gonna be my social worker,
		Harry?

				HARRY

		Yeah, I'm afraid so.

		I'm off for the next two weeks, so 
		behave yourself.

				TREVOR

		Off what?

				HARRY

		Work.

				TREVOR

		You goin' on 'oliday, 'Arry?
	
				HARRY

		That's right.

				TREVOR

		Where?

				HARRY

		Corfu.

				TREVOR

		Where's that?

				HARRY

		Just stay straight till I get back.

				TREVOR

		Put me in your filing cabinet, Harry,
		I can spend the next 2 weeks reading
		all the cobblers you write about me.

	        INT. HOOPER STREET RESIDENTIAL ASSESSMENT CENTRE - 

DAY
HARRY Peter, this is Trevor. PETER Hello Trevor, Harry. Yes, what can I do for you, Harry? HARRY Well, I brought Trevor. PETER You mean, this Trevor? HARRY Yeah, his case notes will be around later in a lorry. PETER Slight confusion here, Harry, have you brought Trevor for admission? HARRY We've just come from the court. PETER I know nothing about this. HARRY It's a telephone referral. PETER When? HARRY 4-5 days ago. PETER Oh, er, yes... wait there. TREVOR How'd you know I was coming, 4-5 days ago? HARRY I didn't. TREVOR I only went to court THIS morning! HARRY It's common procedure! PETER Come through will you, Harry, you too Trevor. See if we can sort this out. HARRY Come on, baldbrain. We'll find you a place even if we have to pay for it. PETER Harry... Trevor is a telephone referral, isn't he? HARRY Right. PETER Hello, Peter Clive. Beep-beep-beep-beep- beep-beep. Hello, Peter Clive. Terry? Yeah. Yeah, she's still here. No, nothing's planned. Er... can you hold on two ticks, Terry? Good. Harry! Your message isn't recorded in the log. Terry's not expected. HARRY Trevor! PETER Oh, Trevor. That makes things very difficult for us to sort out. HARRY Impossible I'd say, Peter. PETER Yeah. HARRY Don't let it get to you, chum, I just remembered I left the care order around at the court. PETER I can't admit him without a care order. TREVOR When can I get down to the job centre? PETER Pardon? TREVOR Where is it, anyway? PETER Eh, just a tick. Terry, I'll call you back. HARRY Hey, what brought this on? TREVOR This place is full of wankers, Harry, I'd rather work than be here! HARRY Look, Peter, can't we do something with Trevor, I'll send him off to get hanged, and then you and me can have a sort-out? PETER Alright. I'll take you through and pass you on to someone else, if you feel okay about that. HARRY You don't need me, baldbrain, do you? TREVOR I'll get down to the job centre as soon as possible, Harry. PETER Alright Trevor, come through, will you? Back in two ticks, Harry. HARRY Watch your step, smart-arse. TREVOR Bollocks. PETER What's this about the job centre, Trevor? TREVOR Magistrate told me to get a bleedin' job! PETER I'm Peter Clive, one of two deputy super- intendents. I'll link you up with your key worker or house parent - if we can find them - they'll fill in your entry form with you, organize a room, once we've got things sorted. We've got things going here like bike workshops, if you're interested. Evening groups, Red Rover days... Oh, we need to have a little conference with you about your contract. INT. HSRAC: TREVOR / ERROL'S ROOM - DAY TREVOR I don't like that bed, it's too near the window, there's a draught, I want that one! ERROL I'm in this bed. TREVOR I know you are! ERROL You got a swastika on your head. TREVOR I know I have! ERROL I'll sell it to you. TREVOR What's all this bollocks about a contract? ERROL Ah, it's Pete Clive, he makes you do it. They make you sign a contract. TREVOR He's a wanker. ERROL Ah, he's a prick. You have to promise to behave, get to school on time - that sort of thing. Do it in your own writing in right hand and sign it. TREVOR What school?! ERROL I still go to my proper school. I've been suspended, so I'm back. TREVOR So why aren't you there today? ERROL Ah, infection in my ear. My case conference comes up next week. Then I might get out of here. TREVOR They're wankers. ERROL Who? TREVOR This lot here! ERROL Hey, what's that? TREVOR Don't you know? ERROL No. Here, you can have this bed if you want. TREVOR No, thanks... I'll stay over here. INT. HSRAC corridors - Day

TREVOR

That's just for the bus!

HOUSE PARENT

That's right!

TREVOR

What about pocket money?

HOUSE PARENT

You've only just got here. It's not been
fixed yet, I don't know how much you're
supposed to get.


TREVOR

Same as everybody else?

HOUSE PARENT

You have damages to pay, don't you? For
the broken window.

TREVOR

I need some pocket money!

HOUSE PARENT

What for? If you're just going down to the
job centre and back, you won't need any
pocket money. You go straight there and
back again.

TREVOR

What if I don't make it back here for
lunch?

HOUSE PARENT

It won't take that long. If it was up
to me, you wouldn't be going at all!

TREVOR

They might send me for a job!

HOUSE PARENT

Here's an extra pound - against your
pocket money.

EXT. SIDEWALK - DAY ERROL Where we going? TREVOR Get in. Remember this! INT. CAR - DAY TREVOR Evo-Stik! TREVOR Stay here. ERROL I feel sick. INT. JOB CENTRE - DAY JOB CENTRE YOUTH Oi! What's this say? TREVOR 'Supermarket, 23.55 per week.' That's... 50p an hour. Bollocks! JOB CENTRE YOUTH Yeah. You ain't supposed to take the cards. You a carpenter? JOB CENTRE GIRL 1 'Dental practice, four 0 levels. Required to train for three years as dental nurse. Should have knowledge of French and Spanish, but not essential.' JOB CENTRE GIRL 2 Yeah, we'd have to suck up to get that one then. JOB CENTRE GIRL 1 Right. JOB CENTRE YOUTH 'Ere, what's this one say? TREVOR 'M/F, 9:30 - 5:30, young person for general warehouse duties, must be able to speak fluent Punjabi and Urdu.' You speak Urdu? JOB CENTRE YOUTH No. TREVOR Fucks your chances then, dunnit?! Here - 'Wood veneer wall coverings. Candidate must read, be of good character, living at home with parents in home environment. No criminal records, school records will be checked.' TREVOR I get a job from you? JOB CENTRE ATTENDANT Yes, but you'll have to wait, dear, there's a queue. TREVOR You getting me a job, right? JOB CENTRE ATTENDANT Yes, but you can't jump the queue. And you're supposed not to take the cards from the display. Do you think you can put them back for me? TREVOR Tacky jobs, ain't they? JOB CENTRE ATTENDANT Well, if you wait, perhaps we can sort something out. TREVOR You got something useful I can do while I'm waiting for a job? I got ten 0 levels, seven A levels, I speak fluent Punjabi and chappati! JOB CENTRE ATTENDANT You'll have to wait! TREVOR I'll come back tomorrow. JOB CENTRE YOUTH See ya! TREVOR I doubt it! INT. ABANDONED SWIMMING POOL - DAY ERROL What's this place? Hey, where did you get all them? TREVOR Down a scrap yard. ERROL What's this? TREVOR Centre punch, automatic - you never seen one? ERROL No. TREVOR T-bar? ERROL What's that for? TREVOR I'll show you. TREVOR Take these. Get 'em in the centre - hide 'em, stick 'em up your arse, don't lose 'em! We get nicked, chuck 'em. EXT. - SIDEWALK - DAY ERROL Hey, all the new cars - they got locks, proper locks! How you gonna do it if you ain't got the right sized keys? TREVOR Which one do you want? ERROL That one. INT. CAR - DAY ERROL See, it's locked! TREVOR Bollocks. ERROL You want the keys? TREVOR No. ERROL Ah, that's sweet! That's sweet, man, that's sweet! TREVOR Now get out. ERROL What?! TREVOR Get out! ERROL What for? TREVOR I've been down the job centre, alright, on the bus. We get back together, they'll suss us, they'll get my keys, so you fuckin' walk! I'm going to see some mates. EXT. HSRAC - DAY PETER Trevor. Trevor! Take it back. TREVOR What? PETER The car, Trevor, take it back. TREVOR I don't know what you're talking about. PETER I'm not bloody stupid! I saw you. You've nicked that bloody car, so take it back! TREVOR I ain't nicked no car! PETER I saw you get out of it. Now I'm not blind, or stupid. Now take it back, get rid of it! TREVOR I'll get rid of it - but I ain't takin' it back! PETER Fine. But do just that. INT. HSRAC: PETER CLIVE'S OFFICE - DAY PETER Trevor! Come through, will you? Where is it, where'd you put it? TREVOR What? PETER The bloody car, Trevor, the car! TREVOR I gave it to Oxfam, they're using it to ship wogs back to Zululand. PETER Where is it?! TREVOR Police parking lot, Broadway Line. Where's lunch? PETER Why'd you take it? TREVOR To get back to lunch! PETER You were given money for a bus! TREVOR I bought a car instead. PETER You're not being clever, you know? TREVOR When go I get lunch? PETER You don't. You've missed lunch, it's too late! TREVOR You what?! PETER Next time I'll have you in a courtroom so fast, you'll wonder what happened. TREVOR Great. PETER It's your last chance. Get out. INT. HSRAC: DINING ROOM - DAY TREVOR You had your lunch? ERROL Yeah. TREVOR I ain't. Oi! Oi! I want my lunch. OI!!! I WANT MY LUNCH!!! CANTEEN MANAGER Do you mind? There's no lunch. You know there's no lunch. We don't serve lunch at 3 in the afternoon. TREVOR He's got his in there, he's got it! CANTEEN MANAGER The dining room's closed. CHEF You bastard, I'll have you! Oww! Aah! INT. HSRAC: DETENTION ROOM PETER Let me through, I have the key! TREVOR Let go! PETER Okay, right! SUPERINTENDENT Get rid of this, shall we? TREVOR There'll be more. SUPERINTENDENT Thank you, Peter. At least you can spell. Harry Parker, your social worker - I know Harry very well - he says you're bright, he says you're worth a bit of bother. TREVOR Wouldn't take the time if I were you. SUPERINTENDENT Don't be clever, don't be smart, we've no time to waste, get that. Plenty of other kids we could be dealing with. If you really want to behave like a moron, we'll put you with all the other morons, under lock and key, at Hatchmere House, and I can do that. I'll have you transferred to a secure unit, we'll do your assessment from there. If you're gonna stay here, let's make it clear, you're gonna have to step into line... TREVOR I'm not sign... ! SUPERINTENDENT Just a sec! You're gonna have to step into line, and you're gonna have to co-operate. Now, that shouldn't be too difficult, we're a reasonable lot. TREVOR I'm not signing any contract! SUPERINTENDENT Well, let's look at that, shall we? Let's give your intelligence the benefit of the doubt. Mr. Parker says your a bright lad, and I respect his opinion. So I have a particular interest in you - personal, between the two of us. I want you to prove to me you're worth all the time and effort that we're prepared to put into you. Your big break, this. 'Cause I'll not give you a second chance. Alright? TREVOR Alright. SUPERINTENDENT Good. So, let's take a look at what life's got in store for you. Go back a few steps, see just how clever you've been so far. For a kickoff, you've just been to court, haven't you, when was it? PETER Thursday. Yesterday. SUPERINTENDENT Just yesterday. You've been to court before, haven't you? Right? TREVOR Right! SUPERINTENDENT Still being clever, still being smart. So, what were the most important things that happened to you, before you went to court, can you remember that far back, eh? You started off here at home. H-O-M-E spells home, there's your mum, your dad, all the rest of 'em. Just like any other mum and dad, all they ask you to do, all you have to do, is to go to school. Now, that's not too much to ask, is it? You're clever, bright. Everybody wants you to succeed, nobody wants a failure on their hands. Get the right qualifications, make your way in the world. But you didn't wanna go to school, did you? You knew best! So you started bunking off - out the gate, over the fence. And your teachers are concerned, 'cause they're there to help. They don't want to see you get behind. So they go and see your mum and dad. TREVOR No teacher's ever been to my house! SUPERINTENDENT No matter, they talked to your mum and dad, didn't they, and they told you to get your arse back into school, they know you have to go! But you still didn't listen. Out the gate, over the fence... before you know where you are, your mum and dad get a visit from the Education Welfare Officer. Got a visit from him, didn't you? TREVOR Yeah. SUPERINTENDENT That's right. 'Cause the EWO's there to make sure you go to school. If you don't, he gives a note to the appropriate authority, and that spells trouble. Now, at this point, lot of kids get a bit of sense. They get themselves together, they get back to school, they listen. But you didn't listen, did you? The Education Welfare Officer visits four, five, six, even seven times, tries to help, discover the problem - a lot of time and expense and all because you don't want to go to school. The EWO reaches his limit. So, he sends your parents a letter, threatening to take you to court, for non-attendance. But that does nothing, absolutely nothing. So, there's a summons. And you go to court for the very first time - your debut. First appearance - send him home for a test attendance, for whatever good that'll do. You're supposed to go to school for 21 days straight. But you foul up after the third or fourth day, and back you go again. So... one, two, three, four, five, six breaks. Six chances to get yourself straight, get your arse back into school, and one, two, three, four, five, six times you've blown it. Now, am I not right? TREVOR Yeah. SUPERINTENDENT But you weren't just bunking off, were you? You had to do summat with all that free time. So, you did a bit of thieving. First two or three times you get caught, you get taken down the nick, and some policeman tells you off, shouts at you. Next time, you get a caution. This time, a sergeant in full uniform, shouts at you. But that don't make a damn bit of difference, 'cause you're apparently deaf to any kind of reason, you go on nicking and making a general bloody nuisance of yourself, when you should be here, learning summat useful! But it's burglary, shoplifting, TDA - touching the dog's arse, taking and driving away... and back you go to court. They're getting to know you now. So you get fined, or sent to the local police attendant centre. Kept off the streets all day Saturday, made to scrub floors by another loud policeman, when you could be watching West Ham lose at home. The magistrates don't know what to do with you - they're all greengrocers and shopkeepers. So, they send you here to us, for assessment. So, what're we gonna do with you? We could recommend you go home... TREVOR What home?! SUPERINTENDENT ... but they won't have you. So, how're we gonna get rid of you? Foster parents? Never. Children's home? A joke. C.H.E., detention centre, borstal. Well, a pity about C.H.E - Community Home with Education - appealing both to your intellectual brilliance, and your public spirit! We used to be called an approved school, the C.H.E. You could've been king of the mafia! Lots of lick- me-arse power trips aroud vicious, young 15- year-olds, and you've just turned 16, bad luck. Not much left to bring you in line, is there? Short, sharp shock at the local detention centre, or borstal. Two simple lessons you're gonna have to learn, DC or borstal. One - discipline, two -respect for authority. You're gonna have to learn it, so you might as well learn it now. This is an open invitation to you, to co-operate, Trevor. For your own good. DC - seven out of ten coming out of detention centres, eight out of ten leaving borstals, reoffend, commit crimes, that is within two years! So... here you are, fresh out of borstal. What's the first thing you're gonna need? Peter? PETER A job. SUPERINTENDENT A job. Peter, how many unemployed do we have at the moment? TREVOR Millions! SUPERINTENDENT Exactly. So, what chance have you got - with your spots in your record - of getting a job against a lad with O and A levels, and a decent haircut? TREVOR About nil! SUPERINTENDENT Optimistic. So, no job. What do you do? Sign on the dole. How much is that worth to you? Place to live, food in your gut, a bit of fun? Nothing, it's gone, broke. No job. No prospects. No cash. So, what do you do? And you're back here. And all because you were too damn stupid when you were here, nicking sweets from the local tuck shop! Well, they've tried all this - and all this didn't work, not with you. So, what's left? And you're on the bandwagon, boy. And you won't get off. Prison - locked up like an animal; a job - no prospects; dole - no cash; thieving - no more chances; prison - an animal! Round and round you go. Well... those are your options. You've created them. You've brought it all upon yourself. Before you kick another door down. Before you kick another chef in the bollocks. Before you do anything - THINK! You may not get
another chance. Settle down, we'll have
another little chat on Monday.

TREVOR

Sounds great, when do I start?

PETER

It doesn't have to be like that Trevor.
There are alternatives, brighter prospects.

TREVOR

You lot are all the same, it's all first
names with you "How do you feel about that,
'TREVOR'?!"
You make out like you've known me.

PETER

I know some things about you, Trevor...

TREVOR

"TREVOR!"

PETER

... I know you're intelligent. It's on
all your reports, you could do well.

TREVOR

You say that like you're giving me a
present.

PETER

I'm not trying to be patronising, if
that's what you think.

TREVOR

Look, what do you expect me to be, thick
in the head, the way you want me?!

BARRY

Trevor!

TREVOR

"TREVOR!"

BARRY

You found your tongue now the superintendent's
gone.

TREVOR

Bollocks.

BARRY

You can walk out of this room now...

TREVOR

Where to?

BARRY

But you must behave responsibly.

PETER

Grow up.

BARRY

No more violence, right, and you start
using some of the intelligence you're
supposed to have.

PETER

That's right.

TREVOR

Bollocks! Piss off, I hate you, the
fuckin' pair of you, I hate you!

BARRY

I don't really know you Trevor, you
don't know me, so how can you hate
me?

TREVOR

For putting me in here!

BARRY

You put yourself in here.

PETER

Trevor, look, sorry. You go kicking
doors down, breaking the place up.

TREVOR

I'm British!!

BARRY

So?

TREVOR

Do you know what that means, do you?

BARRY

I think so, yes.

TREVOR

You proud to be British, are you?

BARRY

What do you mean, Trevor?

TREVOR

Don't you know, I'm proud!

BARRY

I don't really think about it like that,
Trevor.

TREVOR

That's 'cause you've spent too much time
locked up in here with all this niggers.

BARRY

Oh, I see... British bulldog, 1-2-3.

TREVOR

I'm more British than you are, fuckface.
You hate the blacks as much as I do, and
you don't admit it. You hate the blacks
more than I do, 'cause they frighten you.
That's why you lock 'em up...

BARRY

Watch your tongue.

TREVOR

You lock up anything that frightens you!

BARRY

The only thing that frightens me, Trevor,
are the people who put sick ideas like that
into children's heads.

PETER

Trevor, you're not in prison. This is not
a prison.

TREVOR

In here, it's just the same as school. "Do
what we tell you, think what we tell you,
say what we tell you. Squawk, be a fucking
parrot!" I hate you for putting me in here!

You're bullshitters! You swallow your own
bollocks, you expect me to swallow it too!
Blacks in here are as thick as shit, with
no brains, you know it! Admit it. To be
honest, I had to sit in school and watch
these wankers add up on their fingers, I
was held back! All the white kids were
held back.

BARRY

I see, and that's why you spend your time
attacking canteen managers, eh? It's all
the fault of the blacks?

TREVOR

Pakis don't even speak fuckin' English!

BARRY

Oh, send them back.

PETER

Now look, come on!

TREVOR

There's nothing cruel in that, it would be
kind!

BARRY

That why you threw a brick through mister
whatever-his-name's window?

TREVOR

Every Paki is gonna get a brick through
his window. And shit, and piss, and petrol,
wait till it starts.

BARRY

You're proud of all this, are you?

TREVOR

I spend my life watching my p's and q's
'cause some mingy little fucker like you
is gonna write it all down in a piece of
paper, eh? "Your case conference is coming
up. Watch your step." Bollocks! I'll say
what I want to say. You got decisions to
make about my life, you get on with it, it's
got bugger all to do with me! I hate you for
putting me in here. One day you'll fuckin'
pay for it.

PETER

Trevor, we didn't put you in here. You did
that! You put yourself in here, we're trying
to get you out.

TREVOR

Out where?!

PETER

Out of this room. Out of this place, back
into the world!

TREVOR

It's your fuckin' world mate, not mine,
you stick it up your arse, I don't want
it!!

BARRY

Come on Peter, let's go and have a drink.

TREVOR

What's the matter, can't you take a bit
of honesty?

BARRY

Well now, I wouldn't have said that HONESTY
was one of your finer points.

PETER

Just a minute, can I say something? Trevor,
just a minute, that's all. Let's just cool
it, shall we?

This is a bad start. But there's no need for
it to go on like this, no reason at all. What
you have to remember is, this is just a
temporary situation. You could be out of here
in no time. You're here for assessment, that's
all. And what that means is we would like to
help you to help yourself. Now, it needn't be
like that, there are alternatives. If it goes
well, you could be out of here in... three or
four weeks. There are youth projects. You could
travel. Apprentice boarding schools, choose a
trade, you can still study, loads of things.
It needn't be like that. While you're here,
there's pocket money. You want new clothes?
You can have new clothes. There are trips
planned. Christ, it's not as bad as you make
it sound! But there has to be some kind of
understanding between us.

TREVOR

Why were you looking at your watch?

BARRY

I wasn't looking at my watch.

TREVOR

What were you doing, counting the hairs on
your arms?!

PETER

There's a lot you can enjoy, Trevor! Horse-
riding, motorbike scrambling, canoeing... a
lot better than sitting in this bloody room!

TREVOR

What about FUCKING?!

BARRY

Oh, yes, we do have a man, he comes around
every Thursday, to FUCK some sense into
selected individuals.

TREVOR

Yeah, you on that one, are you?

BARRY

Peter, please...

PETER

Trevor, let's just concentrate on getting
you out of here, out of this room. We can
sort out of the world tomorrow.

TREVOR

I'm not signing any contract.

PETER

You can forget about the contract. Forget
about it. All it means is co-operation, and
that's what's important, we must cooperate,
'cause I'll tell you... if we don't sort
out something, and soon, all that - all
that bloody awful mess up there will be
the only options left. There'd be no more
help from us.

TREVOR

Great.

PETER

And you'd be a total bloody failure. At 16!
It's such a bloody waste!

TREVOR

I'm a success, mate, I'm a fuckin' star!

BARRY

Then why are you in here, Trevor, hmm? There
are those among us who'd like to know the
answer to that, and from where I'm standing,
it's not looking too good.

TREVOR

I'm in exactly the right place at the right
time. The fact that you're too fuckin' thick,
or stupid to see that, that marks you down.
You'll be put up against a bus, covered in
petrol, and shot!

BARRY

Fantastic.

TREVOR

All of you, it's you that's fuckin' failed!
I'm not your bleedin' problem, or anyone's
bleedin' problem! Bollocks to you and your
report! Write it, lock me up. Who gives a
fuck?

PETER

I don't know, Trevor. I really don't know
what are we gonna do...

TREVOR

About what?

PETER

about you, Tr...

TREVOR

No, about you, what the FUCK are we gonna
do about you?!!!

If you had any balls, you'd stick a knife
in the bastards who write all that bollocks,
they're wankers! They're just like teachers
at school, they're all fucking wankers!

BARRY

You learn anything at school, did you?

TREVOR

Yeah. Be the best, otherwise forget it.

BARRY

That it?

TREVOR

Everything they teach you at school is
useless.

BARRY

Everything?

TREVOR

It's rubbish, and had bugger all to do
with me and my life.

BARRY

That's what you learned at school?

TREVOR

Work hard, do well, get a job, otherwise
you're no good, you're a vandal. That's what
I learned. It's a lot of bollocks, lies!

We're all fucking great. You ain't taking
bugger all from us. We hate you. You can lock
me in here, but you can't take away the hate
inside my head, I can still hate you in my head.
Don't like that, do you? You can't take a bit
of truth, can you?

BARRY

Oh, I don't think you're particularly truthful.
Or honest. No, you lie with the best of them.
You go out thieving, and that's not particularly
honest. Perhaps school would be a better place
if people like you were more honest to set an
example.

TREVOR

You really believed all that not nicking from
school, not nicking from the local Paki sweet
shop bit, didn't you? That's being honest,
innit?

BARRY

Yes, it is.

TREVOR

You don't really want me to be honest, do you?

BARRY

Yes, I do.

TREVOR

Well then... HONESTLY speaking, I don't think
I can HONESTLY keep the peace while I'm
incarcerated in this shithouse. Or any other
shithouse - contract, or no contract - so there's
no point in saying I will, is there?

How's that for "honesty"?

PETER

Yes, but where is it getting us, Trevor?

BARRY

It's not getting us out of this bloody room.

TREVOR

See, you can't take it, can you? It's the same
when I was at school. I said when I was bored,
when I didn't want to do a lesson, when I wanted
to have a fag, when I wanted to tell the teacher
to fuck off for being a wanker, or kick him in
the teeth. But they couldn't take it. They didn't
want me to be honest in that way. That's why you
don't have lessons in honesty, '9:00 till 10:30 -
Honesty'. They don't want the kids to say what
they're really thinking and feeling inside their
heads. They had lessons like that, they'd lose
control! Wouldn't be able to smack you around
the head when they feel like it. You just want
me to be honest when you take me down the nick.
"It's a fair cop, guv." Or when I fill out a
form. "Be honest, don't cheat, don't carry a
knife. Bend over, let me search you, make notes
about you, keep files on you." If I'm honest
I've got nothing to worry about, have I? You're
protecting me from the dishonest buggers, ain't
ya?
But I can't look at the files... what's read
out by the magistrate, what those fuckers said
about me at school, what's on the police
computer... it's all a load of bollocks!

We're not talking about honesty, we're talking
about sticking to the rules! All those honest
people out there, are just sticking to the
rules, but they lie, and they FUCKING CHEAT
all the way. They just think they're being
honest, 'cause they've swallowed the bollocks
they've been handed, they've been conned!
Well, I've not been conned. That's why you can
stick your hairy contract up your hairy arse.
It's a dishonest con! If you want to put me
in line... well, do it. Try it. Don't fucking
lie about it. Kick me in the bollocks if that's
what you feel like doing, 'cause I'll do the
same to you when I feel like it, so goodnight
and FUCK OFF to ya!

BARRY

Well, goodnight to you too. That's it, Peter,
I'm going.

PETER

Yeah, just, er... just a minute, Barry!

BARRY

Forget it. He's a sod, he's psychotic. Have
him transferred to a secure unit and let
someone else deal with it.

PETER

Harry Parker - he dropped this one on us,
let's chuck it back at him.

BARRY

He says he has no intention of keeping
the peace. Let's have him locked up.

PETER

Give Parker a call.

BARRY

Do you really think it's worth it?

PETER

This one opens my office. The small one's
to the top drawer in my desk. You'll find
my address book. 'Parker' under P.

BARRY

It's a waste of time.

PETER

Yeah.

PETER

Want to go to the toilet?

TREVOR

No, I'll piss on the wall.

PETER

We're gonna have to send you to Hatchmere
House, you know. Secure unit - under lock
and key.

TREVOR

Great. That's where I'm going anyway.

PETER

Anything you care about?

TREVOR

If I told you, you'd confiscate it!

PETER
(sotto)
Same every night... late tomorrow.

PETER

No one cares about your little protest,
Trevor. No one gives a damn. It's totally
insignificant. Just you in this horrible
room.

TREVOR

Yeah.
(pause)
Right.

PETER

Barry Giller and I may not be much... but
we're all there is. No one else gives
a sod.

Going banger racing tomorrow night... why
not drag yourself along, take the social
services for all they've got, eh? Better
than sitting around in this hole.

TREVOR

Who wants to watch a bunch of wankers
smashing up cars?

PETER

Oh, me for one, I quite enjoy it.

One of the lads entered. It's part of a
project. Leroy, he's... he's a good
driver.

TREVOR

And a nigger.

I'll go if I can drive.

PETER

Yeah. Well, a cut above cruising in a
Ford Granada.

TREVOR

Accessory.

I'll go if I can drive.

PETER

Keep the peace?

TREVOR

IF... I can drive.

PETER
(sotto)

Nah, it's not that easy, it takes weeks.
Just a minute, just a minute, think, think...
If I can get him to, er...
Yeah, why not...
It's possible.

Okay, I'll fix it. But you stay away from
Ford Granadas. It's a deal for everyone. No
touching the dog's arse, and keep your boot
out of the chef's bollocks, alright?

BARRY

He's out.

PETER

Yeah, it doesn't matter, Barry. We're all
going to bed now, aren't we, Trevor? Come
on, come on, let's go, let's go.

TREVOR
(sotto)

Wankers United...

BARRY

What happened?

PETER

I'll tell you.

PETER

Trevor!

I don't have to do this, Trevor. I don't
have to do it. Now you let me down... I'll
kill you. With help, that is. I'll get the
chef, and some of the biggest lads I can
find, and Wankers United will bring you
down here, and, together - collectively -
we'll duff you up. Alright?

TREVOR

Great.

EXT. BANGER RACING CIRCUIT - NIGHT TREVOR Shit! Shitty car! Shit! Fuck it! INT. PETER CLIVE'S CAR - NIGHT PETER You were up against professionals, you know? Nearly all those other chaps, those other drivers - they'r professionals. Men twice your age. Isn't that right, Leroy? LEROY Mm? Yeah, yeah. PETER (sotto) Look at the time. Ah, lie-in tomorrow. PETER Hey, do you want some fish and chips, Leroy? LEROY No, no thanks, I had a couple of dogs at the track. PETER If you want to join the project, Trevor, I'll fix it. Bloody try, anyway. You're in now, aren't you, Leroy? LEROY Yeah. PETER You could race on a regular basis. Can't be bad, can it? Join a team. You wouldn't have to nick cars any more, you'd get 'em for free. I know they're free when you nick 'em, but that's not the point, no, heh. The police donate cars to the project. Stolen cars. They're not ones they've stolen. Unclaimed vehicles. Hey, do you want any fish and chips, Trevor? EXT. HOOPER ST. RESIDENTIAL ASSESSMENT
CENTRE - NIGHT
PETER That's funny, can't find my keys. Nah, not there. Lost 'em, dropped 'em. No, don't...! Too late. Damn, now we'll have Hope or Hopkins on our necks. TREVOR Heap of fuckin' tin, that motor, it just died on me. LEROY Mmhmm. PETER Now, I've got a set of dupes somewhere. It's always best with keys. Oh, here we go. Hello, Ray. RAY What's going on? PETER Trevor and Leroy have been on a project race, sorry to disturb you. RAY I don't know about this. PETER Get in Trevor, Leroy. RAY Nobody tells me a thing! PETER It's in the register, Ray, you should look! RAY As far as I'm concerned, this door is locked at 10:30 pm! PETER I'm well aware of that. INT. TREVOR AND ERROL'S ROOM - NIGHT TREVOR Oi! Oi! Your case conference coming up, is it, eh? ERROL What? TREVOR Watch your lip, watch your fucking step. Get your hands off your cock. "This one's got a little bit too much to say for himself", little fucker! Look what I got! INT. HSRAC OFFICE - NIGHT TREVOR Shut it. Shut it! What's your name? ERROL Errol. TREVOR Other one, prat. ERROL Duprey. TREVOR Du-what? ERROL D-U-P-R-E-Y. TREVOR All these keys, who needs them, eh? ERROL Hey, where did you get all them? TREVOR Clive, the wanker, he dropped 'em. ERROL Where? TREVOR On the floor. They got you here, you little wanker. Your file, everything these fuckers have ever said about you. ERROL For my case conference? TREVOR Your fucking execution, mate. That's your school, look. 'Educational Welfare Officer's report' 'Confidential Report to Juvenile Court. Subject: Errol Duprey' 'End of term clinic report.' 'Head of Year report.' 'Record of School Offences: Arguing with a teacher. Disrupting assembly. Kicked football into staff's face from close range.' ERROL He kicked me. TREVOR 'Racist remarks...' Fuckin' hell. 'Damaged calculator by taking it to pieces.' 'Confidential referral form for admission to special unit.' ERROL I don't know nothing about no special unit. TREVOR 'My Contract, by Errol Duprey'. Is this your writing? ERROL Yeah, it's the contract. TREVOR What'd you write with, a hammer? ERROL A pen. TREVOR "I have to behave myself at Hooper Street at all times. I must obey the staff and teachers at Hooper Street, and if I do go home, I must behave myself and listen to my mum." Obey the teachers, listen to your mum... "I have to be up at 8:00 every morning, and wash, and get dressed, and have my breakfast, and get ready for school, and reach there at at five to 9:00 every morning." Did you write this cobblers?! ERROL They make you do it. TREVOR "Signed by, yours sincerely, Errol Duprey." 'Assessment Report on Errol Duprey' Your case conference, coming up, is it, eh? Can't you read? ERROL Not very well, no. TREVOR You fucking baboon. 'Psychiatric Report'. The most striking feature about Errol at interview, was his 9-inch-cock. ERROL What?! TREVOR 'The Future: It seems unlikely for this child to return home, his mother having rejected him for her own lifestyle... Bearing this in mind, future care seems to be the alternative. We would recommend a care order to be made, in order to be able to continue our assessment of his needs.' You're in here for life, mate! ERROL What'll I do?! TREVOR Piss on it! Fucking chuck it, chuck the fuckin' lot! ERROL Where's yours? TREVOR Who gives a fuck? Bottom drawer. Piss on it! ERROL You sure? TREVOR Fucking shit on it! TREVOR Aarggh, fuckin' hell, what a stink! ERROL Hey, put it on! Hey, I can't see to wipe me arse. TREVOR Come on! Shut it and come on. EXT. HSRAC TRANSIT VAN - NIGHT ERROL Come on, man, they'll catch us. EXT. MR. SHAHNAWAZ'S NEIGHBOURHOOD - NIGHT TREVOR Not that one... not that one... where the fuck is it? Here it is - Mr. Shahnawanker! Fucking Paki Bastards! ERROL Fucking Paki bastards! TREVOR Go fuckin' out! You dogs! Animals! ERROL Paki fuckin' bastards! TREVOR Fucking Paki bastards! We don't want you here, get out, Britain is white! Fuckin' white! ERROL Fucking sand-nigger bastards. TREVOR Fucking get out, you bastards! Fucking Paki bastards! We'll put you in the fucking gas chambers! Fuck off back to the Punjab! ERROL You baboons! Get back to the jungle! ERROL Great, man! SHAHNAWAZ Hey you! Come back! You hear? I'll tell the police on you, come back! ERROL Come on! They saw us, man! TREVOR Bollocks. ERROL They saw us, look! I don't want any trouble, my case conference is coming up. EXT. BRADLEY ST. POLICE STATION - NIGHT POLICE OFFICER Little black bastard! Out! Out! Move! EXT. SAINSBURY'S - NIGHT TREVOR BOLLOCKS!!! EXT. EXPRESSWAY TUNNEL - NIGHT

TREVOR

Wanker! Wanker! Fucking wanker!!!

EXT. HARRY PARKER'S APARTMENT - DAWN HARRY Hello? Alright, alright. Second floor, come up. TREVOR Oi, oi! You up early, missus? What you lookin' at? DRIVER Just a minute... hey, excuse me! HARRY Sorry about that, Mr. Driver. Sorry, John, I thought it was the taxi for the airport. I'm sorry. HARRY You nerd! TREVOR You goin' away, Harry? HARRY In there! And keep your voice down. TREVOR You going on holiday, Harry? HARRY What do you want, Trevor? What's going on? TREVOR I'm turning myself in. VIV Harry! HARRY What do you mean? VIV Harry?! HARRY Wait there, and don't make a noise. HARRY Oi! TREVOR Up the Yeats. HARRY Out! You wake him up, and I'm going to boot your arse. I didn't get to bed till 1:00, and I'm up again at 6:00, so I've had bugger all sleep. So watch it, right? Now, what's going on? TREVOR I had a bust-up with those wankers you put me with. HARRY Where you put yourself, Trevor, not me. I kept you out of there for bloody months. TREVOR You're pissing off on your holidays. HARRY If you can't keep straight for 2 weeks in a year, you're not worth a toss. Now, when did you bunk off? TREVOR About 1:00. HARRY Tonight? TREVOR Yeah. HARRY Alright, take my advice, and bunk back in before it's too late. TREVOR I bust the job centre window. HARRY What?! When? TREVOR Friday. HARRY But I only took you in there Thursday. TREVOR They don't know I did it. HARRY The assessment centre? TREVOR Yeah. HARRY But you're telling me? TREVOR Yeah. HARRY Great! TERRY Is it time yet, dad? HARRY No, not yet, Terry, I'll tell you when it's time to go. TREVOR Hello Ter! HARRY Back to bed, I'm working, go on. TREVOR I nicked the Transit from the centre. HARRY When? TREVOR Tonight. HARRY What else? TREVOR Me and Errol chucked bricks through Mr. Shahnawanker's window. TERRY Mum! HARRY Shit. TERRY Mum! Mum, Annie wants to go to the toilet. HARRY Viv! VIV Alright. HARRY Mister who? Whose windows? TREVOR That Paki bastard who had me put away. HARRY What about Harrod's windows, you did them too?! TREVOR I didn't think of that. TREVOR Who's Errol? TREVOR A nig-nog. From the centre. I dumped him in the Transit at the police station, I turned him in. HARRY Is that all? TREVOR Yeah. Ah, no... I pissed on my files in the centre. Errol, shit on his! I'm turning myself in to you, Harry, as you're my mate. You can collect the reward. HARRY Where did you leave Errol and the Transit? What police station? TREVOR One near Bradley Street School. HARRY Crapping on your own doorstep. We'll let them deal with it. TREVOR They'll stand on me, Harry. They don't like me there, I've been there before. They'll roll me in a mattress, and they'll boot me! HARRY What's that to a brick shithouse like you? TREVOR I smashed a police car with the Transit. Send me to another nick. HARRY Your shit, you roll in it. You're an arsehole, Trevor. You're not worth a piss! TREVOR Right. Like my file. INT. JAIL CELL - DAY WARDEN Take your finger off that bleedin' buzzer! What do you want? TREVOR Can you flush the toilet? I done a crap! WARDEN Now, I told you to keep your hand off that buzzer. TREVOR I'm a juvenile offender. You can't keep me in a cell. I know you. P.C. ANSON Do ya? TREVOR I've been charged now. You can't keep me in a cell, you got to send me back to the assessment centre. ANSON Shut your mouth, will you, just shut it. TREVOR You've got to look after me. Give me something to eat! ANSON You see this? Sit down, and shut your fucking rabbit. TREVOR P.C. Anson! ANSON Shut it! You're straight into court Monday. And you ain't going back to no assessment centre, you're going straight to a detention centre, or borstal. And when you come out, we're gonna be waiting outside the gate for you, and we're gonna put you in a car, and we're gonna bring you straight back down here. And we're gonna take your fingerprints. We can't do that now, 'Juvenile Offender', but once you've been to a D.C. or borstal, we can see screw you, and we will. We got you now. And once we got your fingerprints, we're gonna do you for every unsolved taking and driving away in this district, stretching back over months, and that's a lot of cars, I can tell you. And you'll go down, and you'll stay down for years, we'll see to that. TREVOR Sounds great! ANSON You think you're hard, don't you? A lot of verbals. There's two things you're going to learn! At home, at school, at work, in the street - you will respect authority, and you will obey the rules, just like everybody else. That's discipline! Most kids know that by the time they reach your age. Shut it. And keep it shut.

Transcribed from the film by Alan Clarke.