Home Field

Purpose:

This site was put together as a tribute to my sons, and their football careers at Aptos High School. It's a tribute to their growth, and character as individuals. Each of them transformed into a young man in the four years they devoted to playing this sport. The opportunity to witness it was, and will remain, one of the most valued experiences I've had as their father. It's an amazing thing to watch anyone discover, and reveal, the depth of will they carry, or the foundation of who they are. It's a profound gift when the ones you're watching are your own boys. I had no idea I'd I'd be granted such a gift when I made the decision to have children.

There were many occasions where I left the field following one of their games, and found myself weeping with joy, and gratitude. Most Friday nights, I left the field early, and alone, to reflect on who, or what I'd just seen. Observing the emergence of the internal resources I wasn't aware each had was akin to being present for the painting of the Mona Lisa, or the creation of David from a slab of stone. All you can do is marvel.

Watching the way each individual son approached, and applied himself to this game provided a much needed solace. Like any man who becomes a father I've had concerns about how my deficiencies, or vacancies would affect them. I still don't know the answer to that question, and I no longer need one. I was audience to their internal lives, and because of that, have no doubt that each boy has found the independent identity required to become an independent, confident man. I'm relieved to know who they are in the process of becoming is, and will be, bigger than who I am. I'm so proud of each of them for who they are when I'm not around. Nothing in my life has filled me with love, or brought me to joy, in the manner, or to the degree, that they have.

This site is my shallow attempt to contain for them, mementos of what occurred. It's a tribute, and a thank you. It's a tribute to the parts of them I had no hand in creating. It's a thank you for the strength, and patience it took to watch my own attempts at being a man. That's a gift I will never be able to repay.

PM

February, 2017