Season 1: Our Analysis

The First Half: Episodes 1-11


Come here for our take - grades, favorite quotes and scenes from each episode! 

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Season 1: Meet the Walshes

Our Analysis: Episodes 12-22

"To Touch Spanish"

OMG Save Drunky!

 Ima gonna take down some jocks!

 " The Golden Ghetto."

 You're not my mom!

 I'm not a virgin!

Awful close, aren't we? 

Bobby who?

Welcome to West Beverly High!

I like your butt.

 Blondes or Brunettes?

 What are you looking at?

 Fashion Show!

I just can't handle this!

 DJ Auditions!

You're just jealous!

 I have AIDs.  But Steve's cute!

 Oh, the drama.

I hate jail!

Swingers!

Episode 1: "The Pilot Parts One and Two"

  • Richard: Good introduction.  I would watch the next episode based on this pilot.  There were some serious problems: the Walshes making fun of Beverly Hills too much, and I want some redeeming characters other than the Walshes.  Brandon is nauseating.  Bt
  • Best Line: "It's my fault too!" - Cindy.  Is EVERYTHING about Cindy?
  • Best Scene: The 'to touch Spanish' scene.
  • Amber:  This episode is pretty good.  It's cool to see all the characters meet each other.  However, there isn't really much as far as a plot, since we never see or hear about Marianne Moore or Creepy Lawyer again.  Too much time is spent on them and the teachers.  Also: no Dylan automatically makes it lower.  B-
  • Best Line: "Pukemeister" - Kelly
  • Best Scene: Cindy throwing a box at her son's ungrateful ass.

Episode 2: "The Green Room"

  • R: Overall, this episode made me feel a little weird.  It didn't sell the show to me.  Some elements were good (e.g. - totally hot Dylan and the awesomely bad Momma Walsh eavesdropping), but there was just to much pious Brandon shit.  Oh, and not nearly enough passive-aggressive Brenda! I'm kinda loving Brenda right now.  B-
  • Best Line: "I love it, I love it, I LOVE it" - David Silver
  • Best Scene: OMG Save Drunky!
  • A:  I love this episode because it's the beginning of Dylan.  However, it introduces the Walshes as the moral compass, which is ard to swallow.  There is some character interaction I really love - Steve/David, Brenda, Brandon/Dylan.  Very meh about Andrea and Kelly.  B+
  • Best Line: "The ocean's our house, and the green room is the gnarliest place in it." - Sarah
  • Best Scene: Dylan standing up for Scott in Tech Class.  He so clearly would have gotten his ass kicked.

Episode 3: "Every Dream Has Its Price"

  • R: I really liked the Brenda storyline.  There were some awesome WTWBH moments in this episode, and some of the clothes (DYLAN's OVERALLS!) were hysterical.  Personally, I found a lot of it to be kinda socially insensitive but it was the early 90's, so I'll forgive it.  Not a bad episode.  B+
  • Best Line: "BrrrREEEEeeennnnDDDDAAA!" - Cindy
  • Best Scene: When the English teacher turns slam poet and starts talking about 'the golden ghetto'
  • A: This episode blows, as much as it kills me to rank a Brenda-centric episode so low.  The racism was mostly treated like a comedy, and the shoplifting was poor as well.  It's the first mention of the Peach Pit, even though seeing it in that location for the rest of the season is pretty jarring.  When the show doesn't incorporate its younger cast it falters - the best parts thus far are the interactions between the groups.  Great acting by Shannen Doherty though.   C+
  • Best Line: "Why not try to steal their attention?" - Cindy
  • Best Scene: Cindy solving Tiffany's kleptomania.  So lame.

Episode 4: "The First Time"

  • R: I know Amber will probably disagree with me on this for some extremely valid feminist reasoning, but I really enjoyed this episode.  Sheryl was the most awesomely heinous morality check girl so far, and I laughed openly many times.  A number of times I asked for pauses because of the incredible WTWBH of this episode.  Must admit though, the parents are really weird with the whole sex thing.  Why are they so lenient on him?!  A-
  • Best Line: "How am I ever going to get to sleep tonight?"  -Cindy  (To the sound of your offspring doin' the nasty.)
  • Funniest Moment: The "I'm not a virgin!" slap
  • A:  I LOVE this episode - classic 90210.  The subplot with Brenda was cute, but really reveals Kelly for the shitty friend she is.  I love the drama, but I marked it down because of the unbelievable way that Jim and Cindy acted after Brandon had sex in the house, while they were in it, DOWN THE FREAKING HALL.  It was all very cas, and knowing what we do about their reaction to Brenda's missing virginity, it was so hypocritical and ripe with double standards.  It was completely ridiculous.  A-
  • Best Line: "Brandon, you were a wonderful lover." says Sheryl, like she's some wise, aged hooker.
  • Best Scene: The club; punching Dylan, the 'not a virgin' bomb being dropped - LOVE IT!

Episode 5: "One on One"

  • R: This episode was not very good.  I found it to be really backward - in more ways than one.  First off, the race thing was handled REALLY poorly.  Then, there are GLARING errors in continuity.  Since when does Brenda not know how to drive?  What about her amended license in the pilot?!  That's how she got into The Blue Iguana!  Oh, and it is suddenly October.  As in, it's now last month.  Does that mean Brandon's a virgin again  This episode made me angry.  C-
  • Best Line: "Is that Henry Winkler?" - Driver's Ed Teacher
  • Funniest Moment: Kelly's "Bobby who?"
  • A:  Boring.  Subpar.  The B-plot was awful and inconsistent (since when does she not have her license?) and the A-plot was both boring and racist.  Entirely too much Jim!  Awesome smackdown of Brandon weighed out the not so awesome smackdown of Brenda by Brandon.  By the by Ohndrea: you get to cheat the system to take advantage of the educational system, but this guy doesn't...why?  C-
  • Best Line: "I'm not a cowboy, and you aren't a gangbanger crackhead." - Brandon
  • Best Scene: Brandon's smackdown in the library.  But seriously guys, keep it down.  It's a LIBRARY.

Episode 6: "Higher Education"

  • R: Overall, this was a fairly weak episode, but it was saved by some awesome moments.  The second-ever utterane of WTWBH was not only an unexpected delight, but also performed beautifully.  Andrea cemented herself as my current favorite character, and it was nice to see Tori Spelling finally do some goddamn work.  SO, while the story may have sucked, the episode was actually not bad.  B
  • Best Line: "WELCOME TO WEST BEVERLY HIGH!" - Andrea
  • Honorable Mention: "I like your butt." - Brenda
  • Best Scene: Andreas "almost" admittance of love for Brandon
  • A:  I didn't like the plot about cheating, but I did like the interaction between Ohndrea and Brandon - they called each other on their shit, and apologized for what they did wrong.  I also bumped it up from a B bcause of the Dylan and Brenda interactions.  I Love them together so much.  A-
  • Best Line: The "You're Brandon's Sister" thing - Kelly, Dylan and Brenda
  • Best Scene: The "I like your butt" scene.  Brenda and Dylan are so cute with the flirting and the chemistry.

Episode 7: "Perfect Mom"

  • R: This episode won hands-down the best so far.  Jackie is the biggest fucking trainwreck they've had on the show, and I was honestly engrossed.  The whole Jim/Brandon/Keyboard storyline made no sense, but I didn't care.  Oh, and this episode totally  showcased the best of 90's technology and fashions.  How could you not love the crazy earth-to-mothership communication console in Jackie's room?! Love it. A+
  • Best Line: "I have this incredible urge to just...sniff it." - David
  • Best Scene: Jackie's meltdown at the fashion show
  • A:  I love this episode.  We get to see Kelly and Ohndrea's unlikely and sporadic friendship begin, and Kelly and Brenda's friendship deepening.  Brenda and Cindy both have great points, and they really are trying to understand each other.  Ohndrea's realization that she's pretty is cute and not annoying.  It's also great to be introduced to Jackie in all of her drunken aged model glory.  That fashion show was a fantastic mess.  We also see David become more incorporated into the group, but noticeably absent was Donna from the female-centric episode.  She had two lines - she couldn't have bonded with them?  Overall, I LOVE this episode.  Classic 90210.  A+
  • Best Line: "You don't even love yourself!" - Kelly  (so heartbreaking and awesome)
  • Favorite Scene: As much as I love the bonding scenes between the girls, the fashion show where Kelly is humiliated and Jackie goes down in vodka and cocaine soaked flames is killer.

Episode 8: "Seventeen Year Itch"

  • R: I didn't like the Cindy-centric storyline, and the twincest subplot was laughable.  Nothing really grabbed me in this episode.  After the awesomeness of Jackie, we get shitty shitty Glen who tries to shake the Walshes to their core.  And he doesn't even do it that well!  I'm giving some props for other minor subplots and funny moments (e.g. the DJ hunt), but overall this was pretty shitty.  D+
  • Best Line: "Nooooo! I Just Can't HANDLE this!!!" - Cindy
  • Best Scene: The Bobbsey twins discovering the adultery.
  • A:  Okay episode - solid.  Nothing really stands out, though.  David becomes the DJ, and Cindy has a mental affair!  Jim acts like an entitled douchebag, as per usual, but pulls it together for the win.  It's nice to focus on Brenda and Brandon's relationship, but it couldn't save the episode.  Overall, I say "meh!"  C+
  • Best Line: "We're already having a mental affair and that's far more dangerous than a physical one!" - Glen
  • Best Scene: DJ auditions!  Though a close runner-up was Cindy wailing, "No, I can't HANDLE this!" and running out the door.

Episode 9: "The Gentle Art of Listening"

  • R: Pretty good episode, but I had to dock a little because of douchey Brandon, Brenda's fuck ups, and Andreas raging bitch mentality.  The rape storyline was kinda cool, but I sooooo disagree with everything Brenda did.  Also, the whole Lucy plotline was ridiculous.  Oh, and I don't appreciate early-20's being considered old.  Actually, I'm changing from a B to a B-.  I guess I feel more insulted than I realized.  B-
  • Best Line: "We average about five calls a night from guys who say their mother or sister caught them masturbating" - Andrea
  • Best Scene: Bonnie's first call to Rapline
  • A:  Mucho Shannen Doherty makes any episode automatically better, but this episode is enjoyable in its own right.  Thought they had good intentions, Ohndrea and Brenda fucked up left and right.  Brandon's subplots were ridiculous - the parrallels drawn between the three couples lacked subtlety and any entertaining factors.  But Brenda.  So yay!  B+
  • Best Line: "You're just jealous!" - Bonnie (Jealous of your gang rape?  Not likely.)
  • Best Scene: The completely unbelievable bust on the rapists.

Episode 10: "Isn't It Romantic"

  • R: This episode left me breathless.  The only reason I can't write more about it is because there was too much wind to recall.  It was incredible.  Total must-see. A+
  • Best Line: "Why is it with Brandon all you cared about was whether he knew about birth control, but with me my whole value system is on the line?" -Brenda
  • Best Scene: The AIDs Lecture
  • A:  Brenda loves Dylan 4eva!!!  Obviously, this is one of my favorite episodes from season 1.  They are so cute together.  I love the drama, and the broody Dylan, and the Jim and Dylan hating on each other.  The other subplot was good too - the AIDs bomb was awesome.  A+
  • Best Line: "You into videotape?" - Dylan
  • Honorable Mention: "Why is it with Brandon all you cared about was whether he knew about birth control, but with me my whole value system is on the line?" -Brenda
  • Best Scene: Flowerpot make-out session.  Runner-Up: Brenda and Jim's sex talk.

Episode 11: "B.Y.O.B."

  • R: There were some great parts to this episode, but overall I was just extremely angry through most of it. Jim, Cindy (I originally mistyped that as "Cunty". Amber said I can't use that term permanently. WTWBH!), and Brandon all had their douchemachines set at Warp Factor 10 tonight, and they really pissed me off. However, I loved Kelly's awesome drunk slutty bitchery, Brenda's low bullshit tolerance, and Brandon's awesome comeuppance. Oh, not even to mention the TEJAS TWOSOME! Jesus, they were the best guest characters ever. Who knew they were swingers?! Unfortunately, these elements only raised the grade to a C-... but, when you consider that I was going to give it an F, that's pretty fuckin' generous.  C-
  • Best Line: "Oooh, hot and heav-y!" - Donna
  • Best Scene: Brandon sad-faced Walsh in jail
  • A:  I do like this episode, because they allow Brandon to fuck up hardcore.  However, I hate that they let him get off so easy, not in trouble at all.  I hate that Brenda is getting bitched at for the entire episode.  I fucking love that she doesn't take any shit about it though.  Jim's rationalization at the end "when I was your age" to get Brandon off the hook, but not for Brenda just sucks.  However, Dylan more than makes up for it with his alcoholic confession and general presence during this episode makes up for that.  He's helpful without being sanctimonious, which is something that Brandon never is.  EVER.  A-
  • Best Line: "Hold on Jimbo.  I been waitin' all weekend to go a round of goosey goosey ducky ducky with you" - Trudy
  • Best Scene: Dylan and Brandon's talk in the Peach Pit.  They love each other!