Best Facebook Status Updates Ever

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 We have collected you the best, top rated, most hilarious status updated we have ever seen and placed them in one website!
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Best Status Updates selection for all Facebook Status Updates Clever Facebook Status use our StatusUpdates and Clever Quotes for lots of likes.

Best collection of facebook status messages for love, friends, girlfriend, boyfriend, funny fb status, cool, sweet fb text .

Funny Facebook status update ideas and quotes.
We hand pick our most popular facebook statuses to find the best facebook status for your profile. Your friends will love any of the funny facebook statuses you find here and will enjoy reading your facebook status updates. Our facebook statuses collection is always growing so you can always get the best facebook status here.
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Best Facebook Status Updates:
If I were any more single, I'd be a fraction. :)

Bigamy: One wife too many. Monogamy: Same thing.

Why don't you understand me like my iPhone does????

Keyboard, A device for entering mistakes into a computer.

Some men inherit money, some earn it, and some are lawyers.

If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.

Losing a husband can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.

Me and Jenny goes together like peas and carrots. ~ Forrest Gump

You have the capacity to learn from your mistakes. You will learn a lot today.

I am finally old enough to realize my father was right, but now my kids think I am wrong.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away but if the doctor is beautiful throw the apple away!

World Population Rank: 1. China 2. India 3. Facebook 4. USA 5. MySpace 6. Indonesia 7. Brazil 8. Twitter

You have the voice of an angel. Your voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus. ~ StepBrothers

Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.

This dog is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 30 dog, seconds dog! ... Now read without the word dog.