Published in: KML Souvenir (Sept 2007)
Perhaps you are going through a very difficult time in your life right now where you are being tempted to “feel” like God has let you down – like He can’t be bothered with your heartache -- like He has completely forsaken you. It might be the most painful suffering you have ever gone through, and maybe you “feel” like God has not only betrayed you, but that He also can’t be concerned with the pain you’re experiencing.
Dear one … going through the desert of “feeling” forsaken is perhaps the most difficult trial God will ever allow us to be put through … yet the most beneficial - in light of eternity.
A dictionary defines "to forsake" as the action of abandoning, giving up something valued or enjoyed. Consequently, someone who feels forsaken feels abandoned, given up by people who previously used to value him or her.
The feeling that he is not loved, that he has lost his friends. A fear of loneliness, of being left on one’s own in life’, expressed in a fear of the death of those closest to him.
We see a person who previously enjoyed the love of friends, and later lost it and feels alone, deserted, like a castaway. Therefore we may conclude that the key ingredient to feeling forsaken is an intense alone-ness. Secondary to that is the conviction of having lost in value.
Remedies: (3marks): Aurum, Psorinum, Pulsatilla
(2marks): Arg Nit, Cycl, Lach, Mag C, Meny, Merc, Nat C, Plat, Stram
Now let us try to differentiate the forsaken feeling of different remedies, that is, why there is a forsaken feeling in Aurum, why in Pulsatilla & so on….
Aurum’s Forsaken Feeling:
Aurum is a very duty-bound personality. He is conscientious, careful as if he were the keeper of some extremely valuable treasure. Responsibility can wear a man thin. After all, he lives in the constant fear that someone may come and rob the treasure which he has the duty to guard. One day he comes to work and finds that all the gold has been stolen. This is the point where the Aurum pathology begins. In keeping with this idea, Aurum develops Anxiety of conscience as if guilty of a crime. He feels as if he has let down both the people and friends [Religious despair of salvation]. This emotion is so deep that Aurum sees no way out- he has utterly failed [Sadness with suicidal disposition] Death is the way out, the only way to purge the soul of the sin.
In Aurum's reality, he is only accepted in society and able to live in harmony when he is capable of keeping up with his duty. Therefore Aurum is predisposed to feeling forsaken, he is prone to feel lonesome with this responsibility. It is hard for him to share in the more cheerful parts of life and to socialize. However, this feeling of being alone and deserted becomes infinitely stronger when he can't keep up with his duty anymore. Then he feels that he has lost his moral right to be a member of society and becomes an outcast. He has fallen in disgrace with God and the World. In this we have the root cause for Aurum's forsaken feeling.
Pulsatilla’s Forsaken Feeling
Pulsatilla is known as the weepy, irresolute, and affectionate female. A major portion of Pulsatilla's symptoms has to do with seeking or eliciting support from other people. She gives the impression that she always needs someone around to tell her what to do, console her, and support her. Pulsatilla's many fears express a deep-rooted foreboding anxiety [Fear of crossing a bridge, of the dark, death, disaster, impending disease, dogs, ghosts, misfortune, suffocation, Avarice]. Her indecisiveness and constant asking for guidance paint the picture of somebody who has no opinion or goal.
In light of this description it is understandable that Pulsatilla is easily disposed to feeling forsaken. Someone who depends on other people for support always lives in the danger of losing it; and without it, a feeling of being alone, deserted, abandoned - forsaken - fills the soul. Any action which may be interpreted as a lack of support or being let down will evoke a strong feeling of being forsaken in Pulsatilla.
Psorinum's Forsaken Feeling
Psorinum has this feeling of being forsaken or left alone but for sum different reason.
Psorinum feels poor, there is lack of everything, great sadness, hopelessness.
He sees no light, all is dark about him.
He always keep complaining , I have not enough of this or that. ‘I have not enough energy , I have not done my duty as I should have, I am not enough loved …..and so on.
He thinks he fail in everything he do, business is going to be a failure, that he has sinned away his days of grace. It is a fixed idea during the day & he dreams about it at night.
This overwhelming sadness, dejection, no joy in family, feeling that these things are not meant for him, feeling of not having enough attention, help, support by others leads to this forsaken feeling.
Forsaken Feeling of Dulcamara
For Dulcamara this Forsaken feeling comes if people don't show the gratitude they expect, because they are domineering in their relationship, they like to control others, they are very possessive and thus they want everyone to respect them, obey them and when others don’t do like that they feel forsaken.
Platina's Forsaken Feeling
Platina feels deserted or isolated because she isolates herself. She is very haughty and arrogant , there is pride and high opinion of oneself and has some contempt for others.
She imagines that she is of a high born family and that her friend and relatives are of lower origin and are inferior to her so she looks down upon them.
She puts herself upon a mountain top , and once a person is on such a height everything seems far away and feels lonely. So her inherent haughtiness and superiority complex isolates her.
Forsaken Feeling of Kali Carb
Forsaken feeling of Kali Carb refers to the loss of something that cannot be restored. Whatever is lost is lost forever & it is not possible to repair it. They have a serious moment of decompensation when they experience a loss. In Kali Carb this forsaken feeling occurs after the death of the head of the family, be it a father or a husband. There is a feeling that she has lost one of her ‘pillars’ so she has nothing that can give any means of support. This support is never an affectionate support. It is not the loss of an emotional love. It is the loss of some kind of material support or someone who tells you the right ways- how to breathe, how to eat, how to live. When they describe their existence, it is usually something pretty basic.
The forsaken feeling after the death of a husband in Kali carb is not because shd had lost his love but it is because her husband is useful because at least he can provide some money for the family. They do not see what is important in terms of emotions. What is important is their basic need: eating, money, what is basic to survive. Whatever is beyond the basic needs is kind of optional.
In many other remedies after the death of father or husband you can found someone who tells you, “At least I had the support of my mother & my friends” but for Kali Carb, the loss is losing the only fragile thing that was supporting them.
Repertory of Forsaken Feeling
Anxiety; forsaken her, as if a friend had: rhus-t.
Blackmail, emotional, says "you don't love me" when refused: puls. tub.
Company, desire for; children that are rejected, in: carc.
Confidence; thinks others have none, which makes her unhappy, and: aur.
Delusions; alone, always: puls. stram.
• alone, castaway, being a: germ. phys.
• alone, world, she is a. in the: androc. bamb-a. camph. choc. cycl. germ. hura plat. puls.
• appreciated, she is not: arg-n. aur. lap-c-b. pall. plat. puls. seq-s.
• asylum, insane, sent to: lach.
• asylum, she will be sent to: cench.
• company, people are averse to her: an-droc.
• confidence in him, his friends have lost all: aur. hura.
• cowards, persons leaving him are: cann-i.
• deserted, forsaken, is: ARG-N. aur. bamb-a. bar-c. camph. cann-i. carb-an. carb-v. chin. cycl. hura hyos. kali-br. lach. lap-c-b. lap-gr-m. lap-mar-c. lil-t. lyss. MAG-C. nat-c. ozone pall. plat. puls. rhus-t. sac-alb. sanic. stram.
• friend, affection of, has lost the: aur. hura hydrog. hyos.
• friend, she is about to lose a: hura.
• lost, salvation, despised, and, in erotomania: orig.
• lost, salvation, world, to the, beyond hope: arg-n.
• loved by parents, is not: sac-alb.
• neglected, he is: arg-n. lap-mar-c. naja nat-m. PALL. puls. sac-alb. sep.
• neglected, he is, despised by his family, and: arg-n.
• neglected, husband, by her: stram.
• places, none in the world, she has: germ. plat.
• repudiated by relatives, he is: arg-n. hura.
• repudiated, society, he is repudiated by: hydrog.
• room, desolated, is: valer.
• town, he is in desert: carb-an.
• wife, will run away from him: staph.
Despair; others and oneself: arg-n. aur.
Despair; others, about: aur.
Dreams; anger, quarrelled with his father, that he had, who would not recognize him as a son because he had embraced homeopathy: crot-h.
• remorse, repudiated by God, of being: hy-per.
• throw away, being to: rhus-t.
• wedding, everyone is going to a, except her: hydrog.
Fear; neglected, of being: cand-a. puls.
Forsaken feeling: allox. alum. anac. an-droc. arg-n. asar. AUR. bamb-a. bar-c. calc. calc-s. camph. cand-a. cann-i. carb-an. carb-v. carc. chin. chin-b. coff. cortico. cycl. dros. germ. hell. hura hydrog. hyosin. ip. kali-br. kali-c. keroso.
lac-d. lach. lact. lam. lap-c-b. lap-gr-m. laur. lil-t. lith-c. lyss. m-aust. mag-c.
mag-m. MENY. merc. nat-c. nat-m.ozone pall. plat. plb. PSOR. PULS. rhus-t.
sa-bin. sac-alb. sanic. sars. sec. sep. spig. stram. sulph. valer. verat. wye.
Forsaken; feeling, air, amel. in open: rhus-t.
Forsaken; feeling, beloved by his parents, wife, friends, feels of not being: ars. calc. lyc. mag-c. sep. sil. sulph.
Forsaken; feeling, evening: androc. bar-c. puls.
Forsaken; feeling, friendless, feels: arg-n. lach. pip-n.
Forsaken; feeling, heat of sun, or in Sum-mer, from: gels.
Forsaken; feeling, isolation, sensation of: allox. anac. androc. anh. arg-n. arist-cl. camph. cann-i. cann-s. choc. coca cortico. germ. hura hy-drog. lac-h. lap-mar-c. merc. op. ozone pip-m. plat. psil. puls. sac-alb. stram. tab.
Forsaken; feeling, isolation, sensation of, talking, on, people do not hear him: cortico.
Forsaken; feeling, morning: carb-an. carb-v. lach.
Forsaken; feeling, night, with weeping: bamb-a.
Forsaken; feeling, old people, in: aur. psor.
Forsaken; feeling, sighing, with: lith-c.
Forsaken; feeling, thinks she is left alone in the world: plat.
Forsaken; feeling, waking, on: arg-n. lach.
Forsaken; headache, with: meny.
Helplessness, feeling of: aether anac. ant-t. arg-n. ars. bamb-a. calad. cand-a. gels. germ. hecla. hell. hy-drog. jasm. kali-br. lith-c. LYC. ozone petr. phos. puls. rhus-t. stram. tax.
Irritability; carelessness of others, about: lap-gr-m.
Jealousy; neglect, accuses husband of: stram.
Lamenting; appreciated, because he is not: calc-s.
Misunderstood, feels: ign. lap-c-b.
Weeping; goes off alone and weeps as if she had no friends: bar-c.
Weeping; love, from unrequited: ign.
Weeping; neglect, from the slightest: coff.
Delusions, alone, wilderness;
Delusions, ailments from friendship;
Delusions, alone, that she is in the world;
Delusions, of being alone, castaway;
Delusions, confidence in him, his friends has lost;
Delusions, disgraced, that she is;
Delusions, enemy, everyone is an;
Delusions, family, does not belong to her own;
Delusions, has lost the affection of friends;
Delusions, is friendless;
Delusions, help calling for;
Delusions, neglected that she is;
Delusions, persecuted that he is;
Delusions, wife faithless;
Delusions, wrong suffered;
Helplessness, feeling of;
Isolation, sensation of;
How to overcome with this forsaken feeling?
Have u ever seen bamboo trees bend under pressure from the wind? Then u must have noticed them return gracefully to their upright or original position after the wind had died down.
When I think about the bamboo tree's ability to bounce back or return to it's original position, the word resilience comes to mind. When used in reference to a person this word means the ability to readily recover from shock, depression or any other situation that stretches the limits of a person's emotions.
Have you ever felt like you are about to snap Have you ever felt like you are at your breaking point Thankfully, you have survived the experience to live to talk about it.
During the experience you probably felt a mix of emotions that threatened your health. You felt emotionally drained, mentally exhausted and you most likely endured unpleasant physical symptoms.
Life is a mixture of good times and bad times, happy moments and unhappy moments. The next time you are experiencing one of those bad times or unhappy moments that take you close to your breaking point, bend but don't break. Try your best not to let the situation get the best of you.
Perhaps one of the most common reasons for forsaken feeling is a lack of enough interests and activities. A small number of them tends to become routine and often boring. Interests and activities are very important in mental health, contributing to self-esteem and happiness. They give satisfaction, help make you feel good about yourself, and keep your mind off problems and negative thoughts and emotions. Simply cultivating them can sometimes cure depression, grief, addiction, explosive anger, anxiety, excessive worrying, or guilt, especially if you do the activities whenever you feel the negative emotion. They are also important social skills that give you pleasant and interesting things to talk about, improving your conversation skills and helping in making and keeping friends
Reexamine your expectations or priorities in life and, if necessary, adjust them to suit reality better. Depressed people often think they can't be happy without certain things, such as a lover, a particular lover, material possessions, a much higher income, etc. You can eliminate such problems by changing your negative thinking and learning to accept the situation.
Work on your personal problems, using small steps to make sure you avoid becoming overwhelmed. Work on only one or two simple things at a time, breaking large or complex problems into goals you can easily accomplish. Use rewards, friends, family, and support groups. What negative or stressful situations exist in your life? What can you do about them? Don't give up and allow your problems to continue. Brainstorm solutions and ask other people for ideas. Some depressed people reject all the possible solutions, finding reasons to eliminate each one as unacceptable, unpleasant, or unworkable. Don't let negative thought habits interfere with problem solving. Keep an open mind to all possible solutions.
Don't worry about whether you are happy. Develop interests, activities, and friendships, be kind, help other people, strive to be virtuous, accept emotional pain, work on conquering your personal problems, and improve your thinking habits. These things will lead to happiness.You can view your life however you want. It's your choice. But if you have a negative attitude towards your life or circumstances, ask yourself if it isn't your self esteem that's a problem rather than your external circumstances.. Constantly criticizing everything around us helps us feel better about ourselves. But this way of eliminating unhappy feelings is no better than abusing substances. So, becoming happier requires being active, changing what we can change, accepting what we cannot change, trying not to blame others or circumstances for our misfortunes, valuing what we have and developing a more positive attitude to our lives.
So, Cheer Up :)