Most men are not looking at every woman they date and comparing them to the Victoria's Secret catalog models. Most men want to be with a woman they find attractive in mind, body and spirit.
And what each man finds attractive is subjective. Beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. The one thing most men want is a woman who takes care of her body and takes pride in her appearance.
Few men can tell the difference between an outfit purchased at JCPenney and an outfit from an upscale clothing line. What a man will notice is if your outfit is ill fitting, a poor color/pattern for you, or a style this is either inappropriate or from days gone by.
A man will notice if your outfit is wrinkled, stained or in need of repair. He will notice if your hair cut, color or condition are unflattering. He will notice if your hair style is elegant or unkept. Unless you are a punk rocker or into grunge, this will not go over well.
A man will notice if your posture, walk and body language says "I'm confidant, comfortable and happy." or it says "I don't feel good, I'm unhappy, and I don't like who I am."
Men who want healthy relationships want to connect with women on many levels. They want the women they date to be compatible in terms of values, interests, outlook and they want to have chemistry. Chemistry is that mysterious element of attraction, with a feeling of rightness and an intuitive sense that is hard to describe.
If a man is attracted to you on multiple levels he will be able to easily overlook things that you might be very concerned about, such as being somewhat over weight or having cellulite or a mole or a scar.
Your job is to look your personal best. Do your best to care for your body. Change your diet if you need to. Join a gym and work out with a personal trainer if you need to. Take a good look at your dating wardrobe every 6 month and get rid of unflattering attire. Keep your hair and make up contemporary.
If the idea of updating your style is overwhelming for you, get someone you love and trust (who has a great sense of style) to help you out. You'd be surprised what a difference a hair, make up and style update can do for your self esteem.
When you feel like you look your best, it will show in your walk, your smile, your voice, and you will radiate confidence. And that is very attractive.
Food for thought.