Sunday Family Humour 6th December

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

A very special thank you to all contributors.
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A true story
Thanks to Lee

On the side of the road, but even in the dim light of day, he could see she needed help. So he pulled up in front of her Mercedes and got out. His Pinto was still sputtering when he approached her.



      Even with the smile on his face, she was worried. No one had stopped to help for the last hour or so. Was he going to hurt her? He didn't look safe; he looked poor and hungry.

      He could see that she was frightened, standing out there in the cold.. He knew how she felt. It was that chill which only fear can put in you.

        He said, 'I'm here to help you, ma'am. Why don't you wait in the car where it's warm? By the way, my name is Bryan Anderson.'

       Well, all she had was a flat tire, but for an old lady, that was bad enough. Bryan crawled under the car looking for a place to put the jack, skinning his knuckles a time or two. Soon he was able to change the tire. But he had to get dirty and his hands hurt.


      As he was tightening up the lug nuts, she rolled down the window and began to talk to him. She told him that she was from  St. Louis and was only just passing through. She couldn't thank him enough for coming to her aid.

      Bryan  just smiled as he closed her trunk. The lady asked how much she owed him. Any amount would have been all right with her She already imagined all the awful things that could have happened had he not stopped.

     Bryan  never thought twice about being paid. This was not a job to him. This was helping someone in need, and God knows
there were plenty, who had given him a hand in the past. He had lived his whole life that way, and it never occurred to him to act any other way.

        He told her that if she really wanted to pay him back, the next time she saw someone who needed help, she could give that person the assistance they needed, and Bryan added, 'And think of me..'

       He waited until she started her car and drove off. It had been a cold and depressing day, but he felt good as he headed for home, disappearing into the
twilight.

        A few miles down the road the lady saw a small cafe.. She went in to grab a bite to eat, and take the chill off before she made the last leg of her trip home. It was a dingy looking restaurant. Outside were two old gas pumps. The whole scene was unfamiliar to her. The waitress came over and brought a clean towel to wipe her wet hair. She had a sweet smile, one that even being on her feet for the whole day couldn't erase. The lady noticed the waitress was nearly eight months pregnant, but she never let the strain and aches change her attitude. The old lady wondered how someone who had so little could be so giving to a stranger. Then she remembered  Bryan  ..

        After the lady finished her meal, she paid with a hundred dollar bill. The waitress quickly went to get change for her hundred dollar bill, but the old lady had slipped right out the door. She was gone by the time the waitress came back. The waitress wondered where the lady could be. Then she noticed something written on the napkin.

         There were tears in her eyes when she read what the lady wrote: 'You don't owe me anything... I have been there too. Somebody once helped me out, the way I'm helping you.. If you really want to pay me back, here is what you do: Do not let this chain of love end with you.'

      Under the napkin were four more $100 bills.

       Well, there were tables to clear, sugar bowls to fill, and people to serve, but the waitress made it through another day. That night when she got home from work and climbed into bed, she was thinking about the money and what the lady had written. How could the lady have known how much she and her husband needed it? With the baby due next month, it was going to be hard....

         She knew how worried her husband was, and as he lay sleeping next to her, she gave him a soft kiss and whispered soft and low, 'Everything's going to be all right. I love you, Bryan Anderson.'

        There is an old saying......'What goes around comes around.' Today I sent you this story, and I'm asking you to pass it on. Let this light shine.

     Don't delete it, don't return it.. Simply, pass this on to a friend

       Good friends are like stars....You don't always see them, but you know they are always there.

       WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND

 

                          ~GOD BLESS!~



WHITE HOUSE DINNER!
 
 
white house dinner





The future of nursery rhymes 
Thanks to Colin
nursery rhymes
 It's raining, It's pouring 
Oh sh!t, it's Global Warming. 
 

Nursery rhymes 2
Jack and Jill went into town 
To fetch some chips and sweeties. 
He can't keep his heart rate down 
And she's got diabetes. 
 


Nursery rhymes 3
Mary had a little lamb 
It ran into a pylon. 
10,000 volts went up its arse 
And turned its wool to nylon. 
 
Nursery rhymes 5
Nursery rhymes 4
Georgie Porgie Pudding and Pie 
Kissed the girls and made them cry. 
When the boys came out to play 
He kissed them too cause he was gay.

 

Nursery rhymes 5
Jack and Jill 
Went up the hill
And planned to do some kissing. 
Jack made a pass 
And grabbed her ass 
Now his two front teeth are missing.

Nursery rhymes 6
Mary had a little lamb 
Its fleece was white and wispy. 
Then it caught Foot and Mouth Disease 
And now it's black and crispy.

 





The Wooden Spoon

Wooden Spoon




Great Photos
Thanks to Lee

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Exam Blunders
Thanks to Tony

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She is 92!

She is 92





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