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Sunday Family Humour 12th July

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

A very special thank you to all contributors.

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Stimulus Economics

It is the month of August on the shores of the Black Sea. It is raining, and the little town looks totally deserted. It is tough times, everybody is in debt and everybody lives on credit.
Suddenly, a rich tourist comes to town.
 
He enters the only hotel, lays a 100 Euro note on the reception counter, and goes to inspect the rooms upstairs in order to pick one.
 
The hotel proprietor takes the 100 Euro note and runs to pay his debt to the butcher.
 
The Butcher takes the 100 Euro note, and runs to pay his debt to the pig grower.
 
The pig grower takes the 100 Euro note, and runs to pay his debt to the supplier of his feed and fuel.
 
The supplier of feed and fuel takes the 100 Euro note and runs to pay his debt to the town's prostitute that in these hard times, gave her "services" on credit.
 
The hooker runs to the hotel, and pays off her debt with the 100 Euro note to the hotel proprietor to pay for the rooms that she rented when she brought her clients there.
 
The hotel proprietor then lays the 100 Euro note back on the counter so that the rich tourist will not suspect anything.
 
At that moment, the rich tourist comes down after inspecting the rooms and takes his 100 Euro note, after saying that he did not like any of the rooms and leaves town.
 
No one earned anything.    However, the whole town is now debt free, and looks to the future with a lot of optimism.
 
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is economic recovery stimulus!
 
   


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press cuttings 1

press cuttings 4


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The Ross Sisters

Skip the first 50 seconds, but then see an amazing display of dancing, yoga and strength

“The Ross Sisters were a trio of female sibling singing dancers consisting of Aggie Ross, Elmira Ross, and Maggie Ross, (whose real names were Veda Victoria, Dixie Jewel and Betsy Ann Ross). The Ross Sisters performed as a 3-part harmony trio, in which they also danced and did acrobatics and contortionism. Their public attention peaked during the 1940s, during which they were featured prominently in the film Broadway Rhythm. A shortened version of this same clip also appears in the compilation film “That’s Entertainment! III” (1994).”

Ross Sisters




Indian Weather

It was late fall and the Indians on a remote reservation
asked their new chief if the coming winter was going to
be cold or mild.

Since he was a chief in a modern society, he had never
been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky,
he couldn't tell what the winter was going to be like.

Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he told his tribe
that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that
village members should collect firewood to be prepared.

But, being a practical leader, after several days, he
got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the
National Weather Service and asked,

'Is the coming winter going to be cold ?'

'It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold,'
the meteorologist at the weather service responded.

So the chief went back to his people and told them to
collect even more firewood in order to be prepared.

A week later, he called the National Weather Service
again. 'Does it still look like it is going to be a

very cold winter?'

'Yes,' the man at the National Weather Service again
replied, 'it's going to be a very cold winter.' The
chief again went back to his people and ordered them
to collect every scrap of firewood they could find.

Two weeks later, the chief called the National Weather
Service again. 'The winter is going to be very cold ?
Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be
very cold? 'Absolutely,
' the man replied.

'It's looking more and more like it is going to be
one of the coldest winters we've ever seen.' How
can you be so sure?' the chief asked.

The weatherman replied, 'The Indians are collecting
firewood like crazy.'

Something to remember whenever you get advice from a
government official!


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Gruyeres, Switzerland

Google Presentation



What do you see?
 

(CHECK THE EXPLANATION BELOW!)


What do you see?

You saw a couple in an intimate pose, right?

Interestingly, research has shown that young children cannot identify the intimate couple because they do not have prior memory associated with such a scenario.

 

What they will see, however, are the nine dolphins in the picture!

So, I guess we've already proven you're not a young innocent child.

Now, if it's hard for you to find the dolphins within 6 seconds, your mind is SO corrupted that YOU probably need help!

OK, here's help: Look at the space between her right arm and her head, the tail is on her neck, follow it up. Look at her left hip, follow the shaded part down, it's another one, and on his shoulder...

OH, S U R E , you see them NOW !!!!!









Price of gas in France


A thief in Paris planned to steal some Paintings from the Louvre.

Money 1

After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings, and made it safely to his van.
 
 However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas.
 
 When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied, "Monsieur, that is the reason I stole the paintings---

Money 2

Money 3 I had no Monet
Money 4
Money 5

To buy Degas
Money 6 
Money 7

To make the Van Gogh.


Money 8

Money 9See if you have De Gaulle to send Sunday Humour to someone else.
Money 9
 
I show it to you because I figured I had nothing Toulouse



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