HOW TO CLEAN A NOSE RING : CLEANING MY COLON.
a nice goodbye
I wanted to strip off your clothes and hold you closer to me than I had ever held you before. I wanted to kiss each one of your sweet toes and whisper a different secret to each one. I wanted to kiss the tops of your feet, your ankles, your calves and your knees. How can you say you have truly loved someone until you have kissed the backs of their knees? I don't believe your lips have ever been anywhere near my knees, but it doesn't matter to me. This is my goodbye. Twenty eight years ago, in this very room, Julio Delgado injected himself with speed for the last time. I remember him vaguely. I lived three blocks away at Fillmore and Hayes where I extended more credit from the corner market below Goofball Paul's mother's flat than the owners would traditionally allow. They let me because I was living in the building. When I left one morning, after a sad night with Cheryl, I stopped into the shop to repay them every last penny of what I owed them before walking away from that flat forever. A month later Julio - Jules to his friends - walked out into Oak street and was hit by a taxi rushing a nervous young couple to the emergency room. He was dead before the ambulance arrived, and the woman gave birth to a perfect little girl in the arms of the emergency medical technicians while they waited for the police to arrive. I wanted to rest my head on your abdomen for a long time, listening to your busy stomach, and the mighty rhythm to your heart beat. To feel your lungs fill up with air, and imagine the exchange of oxygen and blood. I wanted to hold your hands in mine, and kiss them tenderly. I don't want you to love me "very, very much" or even "more than words" I only wanted you to love me. Mark Verber was in San Francisco illegally. He had arrived in 1971 on a student visa from Switzerland and even though he never graduated from the University, he stayed. There were many possible arrangements to be made, applications, extensions, and even several marriage opportunities, but he was not here for formalities, or marriages of convenience. Mark was here for love and sex. He worked in a leather shop on Market street and almost never took his cop style sunglasses off. He didn't talk much, and had very few friends. After the sun went down, he would slip on his motorcycle jacket and walk slowly through the side streets of the warehouse district until he met with other men in leather with tight jeans and sunglasses in an era of polyester blouses and flowing pant legs. He joined an army of beautiful men in the last steam room, for the last dance in the last great discotheque as he swallowed the drops from the ice chips the hospice nurse held against his lips. He had come to the city to be liberated. The nurse was living with a man whom she was sure no longer loved her. They no longer made love, and rarely talked about much more than what they had done that day, and what they might do tomorrow. It was a lonely apartment of schedules, checks to write, and chores. She had gained so much weight since taking this hospice job that her back and hips hurt all the time. She felt exhausted emotionally, and ugly almost all the time. Somehow at work, feeding, cleaning, extracting bowel movements, emptying bed pans, and listening to the stories of the men who were departing even faster than they were arriving was the only place in her life where she felt welcome, wanted, and almost beautiful. You groaned, and said no. You didn't struggle, or pull away, but that hasn't been your custom lately. You grow limp, and withdraw even more from the moment until you are gone and all I can feel is the pin pricks of distant anger which is never explained. She had been Miss Pacifica in 1959. While at the time her looks were well ahead of their time, no one could have guessed that she would come entirely into her own, and look almost thirty until she was approaching fifty. She had married the man because she thought she was supposed to. Her parents liked that he had money, and they offered little guidance, only shame and disappointment at her doubts. Less than a year later she was living in an apartment with two friends who took her in after she'd left him. Again, she was ahead of her time. In the early nineteen sixties this was almost unheard of, but soon it would spread across the world like an epidemic. So I fill in the blanks, and I am very creative. I explain it one way, and then another. Each story more tragic than the next. I turn my angry eyes toward you. The stories blur and overlay one another until I can't tell what I am thinking or feeling anymore. So I smile, and my eyes are hollow, I withdraw and think only of you - your heart, your soul. Thierry Finch wasn't much to look at, but he could fight. On the summer afternoon when the three boys cornered him and stole his bicycle from him he fought tooth and nail until one of the boys cracked him over the back of the head with a bLook At The Camera Boys ~ Blacky & Champaz!!
Jason had my camera and he was able to get down on the floor where as i cannot... The sun was out and in the lounge room, where they are both sitting they were in the sun but i had to block it for the capture.. Champaz was cleaning Blacky's head before this capture was taken... I didnt notice at first but Champaz is actually sitting on Blacky's tail in this capture...i also love how wide Blacky's eyes are in this shot too...And Jason did the effects on this capture... Thanks Babe.... UPDATED ON BLACKY.... At 7.24pm... 11/6/2011... Blacky's is still coughing but it has reduced now to a couple of times through the night and mornings.... He's got to have all of those antibiotics before the next vet visit.... But he seems more alert now and he's starting to do the old things that i missed so much, and hes not hiding away as much, but tonight the little "vampire cat" drew blood in my thumb as i didnt get it out of the way quick enough and i've got two punch wounds in my thumb.... And hes sleeping more too, so im very happy with the progress!! Cheers Michelle xxxx.. MY UPDATE.... I have refreshed my "head cold" up and now im back to square one, i havent been eating much and hardly slept like forever as it seems, so im going down hill but YEAH my boy is getting better slowly.... MICHELLE , CHAMPAZ and Blacky.xxxxxx.. THANKS SO MUCH AGAIN FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT YOU ARE SHOWING MY BOY IN GETTING BETTER I KNOW IT"S HELPING WITH HIS RECOVERY CHEERS TO YOU ALL MY FRIENDS... XOXOXOXOXOXOXXOXOXOXOXOX MICHELLE.. ANOTHER UPDATE... At 10.15pm...12/6/2011.. Blacky has just vomited all over the place and he has the slops bad.... i dont know if this is a bad sign or if hes having a reaction to the tablets....... I will have to ring the vet tomorrow as i keep getting the answering machine, but i do hope they are working tomorrow as we have a public holiday on monday for the queens birthday!!!!!!!!!!! its like Blackys body doesnt want to get better.... ok hes just threw up again and messed on the floor ,ive got some cleaning to do now, and hes meowing alot i hope hes not in too much pain im very worried now!! i guess im back on the roller coaster again, Michelle :( BLACKY"S JUST BEEN TO THE VETS..... At 9.05am... 13/6/2011.. Blacky's just come back from the vets, i was able to get hold of Catherine at 4.00am in the morning, as she was in surgery most of the night... Once i told her what was happening with Blacky i had him straight there... She took his temperature and it was 39.5degrees Celsius, and he even felt hot tooand his nose was super warm.... So she gave him some stuff to flush out his system properly and gave him an injection for the vomiting too... But Catherine wants him to stay on these antibiotics as she was happy to find they have reduced his coughing... He still has to take 1/2 a tablet morning and night.... He's only coughed a couple of times since hes been home, she had a little look down his throat and its swollen and very red and tender, thats why when he had the tablets before he was coughing straight after... He's sleeping right now on his "sick bed" in the computer room, Catherine wants me to keep Champaz away from Blacky at the moment.. Thats a bit hard as Champaz wants to keep licking his head....So on Monday the 20th of June at 1.20pm is his next booked appointment with Catherine for a routine check up and to see if he needs bloods and the x-ray.. so i just have to keep a very close eye on him till then..... MYSELF... i know how Blacky feels as my throat feels like "barb wire" and my head i wish it would just fall off, with all this stress and major sickness going on im used to not sleeping and eating, Jason tries but im just not that hungry at the moment... Its hard on him too to watch Blacky and myself this sick, but hes away most of the day working so he's not that too involved to get sick, (i hope)!! Michelle (SICK), Blacky (sick) , Champaz (healthy) and Jason (healthy).....
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