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Ch 18

The Arch-preposterous
149
Beelzebub continued as follows:
“The cause of my first meeting with that three-centered
being who subsequently became my essence-friend and by
whom I saw the said experiments with the Omnipresent-
Okidanokh, was as follows.
“That you may better represent to yourself the events
of this tale of mine, you must first of all know that at the
beginning of my exile to that solar system, certain corresponding
essence-friends of mine who had not taken part
in those events from which the causes of my exile had issued,
performed concerning my personality that sacred
process which exists in the Universe under the name of
the ‘Sacred Vznooshlitzval,’ that is to say, concerning my
personality there was implanted in the presences of those
three-brained beings by means of another sacred process
called ‘Askalnooazar,’ that which Objective Science defines
by the notion, ‘Trust-another-like-yourself.’
“Well, then, just after my arrival in that solar system
Ors, when I began visiting its various planets and first descended
upon the surface of the planet Saturn, it turned
out in connection with the aforesaid, that one of the beings
who had undergone the sacred action of ‘Vznooshlitzval’
regarding my person was what is called there the
’Harahrahroohry’ of all the three-centered beings arising
and existing on the planet Saturn.
“On the planet Saturn a being is called the ‘Harahrahroohry’
who is the sole chief over all the other beings
on that planet.
“Similar beings-chiefs exist also on all the other planets
upon which three-brained beings breed; they are differently
150
named on different planets; and on your planet Earth

such a chief is called a ‘King.’
“The only difference is that while everywhere else, even
on all the other planets of the same system, there is one
such king for the whole of the given planet, on your peculiar
planet Earth there is a separate king for every accidentally
segregated group of these favorites of yours and
sometimes even several.
“Well, then:
“When I first descended on the surface of the planet
Saturn and mingled with the three-centered beings there,
it chanced that I had occasion the next day to meet the
Harahrahroohry himself of the planet Saturn; and during
what is called our ‘Exchange-of-subjective-opinions’ he
invited me to make his own ‘Harhoory,’ that is, his own
palace, the chief place of my existence during the whole
of my sojourn on their planet.
“And this I did.
“So, my boy, when we were once talking simply according
to the flow of what is called ‘being-associative mentation,’
and happened to touch on the question,
among other things, of the strange results actualized in
the manifestations of the particularities of the Omnipresent-
Okidanokh, the venerable Harahrahroohry of the
planet Saturn first mentioned that one of his learned
beings-subjects, by name Harharkh, had recently devised
for the elucidation of many of the previously unexplained
properties of that cosmic substance, an exceedingly interesting
appliance which he called a ‘Rhaharahr,’ the chief
demonstrating part of which he called a ‘Hrhaharhtzaha.’
“And further, he offered to make, if I wished, the necessary
arrangements for showing me all these new inventions
and for giving me every possible explanation of them.
“The result of it all was that the following day, escorted
by one of that venerable Harahrahroohry’s court, I went
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to the place of existence of that Gornahoor Harharkh
where I first saw those novel elucidatory experiments with
the Omnipresent-Okidanokh.
“Gornahoor Harharkh, who afterwards, as I have already
told you, became my essence-friend, was then considered
one of the foremost scientists amqng the ordinary
three-brained beings of the whole Universe, and all his
constatations as well as the elucidatory apparatuses he had
invented were everywhere widespread, and other learned
beings on the various planets were using them more and
more.
“Here it will do no harm to remark that I also, thanks
only to his learning, had later in my observatory on the
planet Mars that Teskooano which, when it was finally established,
enabled my sight to perceive, or as is said,
’approach-the-visibility’ of remote cosmic concentrations,
7,000,285 times.
“Strictly speaking, it was owing to just this Teskooano
that my observatory was afterwards considered one of the
best constructions of its kind in the whole Universe; and,
most important of all, it was by means of this Teskooano
that I myself thereafter could, even while staying at home
on the planet Mars, relatively easily see and observe the
processes of the existence occurring on the surfaces of
those parts of the other planets of that solar system which,
in accordance with what is called the ‘common-cosmic
Harmonious-Movement,’ could be perceived by being-sight
at the given moment.
“When Gornahoor Harharkh was informed who we
were and why we had come, he approached us and forthwith
very amiably began his explanations.
“Before beginning his explanations I think it not inadvisable
to warn you once and for all that all my conversations
with various three-centered beings arising and existing on
various planets of that system where I was obliged
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to exist for
the ‘Sins of my youth’—as for instance in the
present case, the
conversations with this Gornahoor
Harharkh which I am now about to relate to you while
we travel on the space-ship Karnak—all proceeded in dialects
still quite unknown to you, and sometimes even,
by the way, in such dialects the consonances of which
were quite ‘indigestible’ for perception by normal being-functions
assigned for this purpose.
“And so, my boy, in view of all this, I shall not repeat
these conversations word for word but shall give you only
their sense in our speech, continuing of course to employ
those terms and ‘specific-names’ or rather those consonances
produced by what are called ‘being-vocal-chords,’
which consonances are used by your favorites of the
planet Earth and which have now become for you, owing
to continued repetition during my tales about them, habitual
and easily perceived.
“Yes ... it must be noticed here that the word ‘Gornahoor’
is used by the three-brained beings on the planet
Saturn in courtesy; they utter it before the name of one
whom they are addressing.
“It is the same with your favorites on the planet Earth.
They also have added to the name of every person the
word ‘Mister’ or sometimes a whole meaningless phrase
expressing the notion for which our honorable Mullah
Nassr Eddin has the following sentence:
“And namely he says:
‘Nevertheless, there’s more reality in it than in the
wiseacrings of an “expert” in monkey-business.’
“Well, then, my boy . . .
“When this subsequent essence-friend of mine, Gornahoor
Harharkh, was informed of what was required of
him, he invited us by a sign to approach one of the special
appliances which he had made and which, as it later
turned out, was named by him ‘Hrhaharhtzaha.’
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“When we were nearer the said special and very strange
construction, he pointed to it with a particular feather of
his right wing and said:
“‘This special appliance is the principal part of the
whole of my new invention; and it is just in this that the
results are revealed and shown of almost all the peculiarities
of the Omnipresent-World-substance-Okidanokh.’
“And, pointing to all the other special appliances also
present in the ‘Khrh,’ he added:
“‘I succeeded in obtaining extremely important elucidations
concerning the omnipresent and everywhere penetrating
Okidanokh, because thanks to all these separate
special appliances of my invention, it became possible,
first to obtain all three fundamental parts of the Omnipresent-
Okidanokh from every kind of sur- and intraplanetary
process and then artificially to blend them into
a whole, and secondly, also artificially to disassociate them
and elucidate the specific properties of each part separately
in its manifestations.’
“Having said this, he again pointed to the Hrhaharhtzaha
and added that by means of the elucidating apparatus,
not only can any ordinary being clearly understand
the details of the properties of the three absolutely independent
parts—which in their manifestations have nothing in
common—of the whole ‘Unique-Active-Element,’
the particularities of which are the chief cause of everything existing
in the Universe, but also any ordinary being can become
categorically convinced that no results of any kind
normally obtained from the processes occurring through
this Omnipresent World-substance can ever be perceived by
beings or sensed by them; certain being-functions, however,
can perceive only those results of the said processes which
proceed for some reason or other abnormally, on account
of causes coming from without and issuing either from
conscious sources or from accidental mechanical results.
154
”The
part of Gornahoor Harharkh’s new invention
which he himself called the Hrhaharhtzaha and regarded
as the most important was in appearance very much like
the ‘Tirzikiano’ or, as your favorites would say, a ‘huge electric-
lamp.’
“The interior of this special structure was rather like a
smallish room with a door that could be hermetically
closed.
“The walls of this original construction were made
of a certain transparent material, the appearance of
which reminded me of that which on your planet is called
’glass.’
“As I learned later, the chief particularity of this said
transparent material was that, although by means of the
organ of sight beings could perceive through it the visibility
of every kind of cosmic concentration, yet no rays
of any kind, whatever the causes they may have arisen
from, could pass through it, either from within out or
from without in.
“As I looked at this part of this said astonishing being-invention,
I could through its transparent walls clearly
distinguish inside in the center what seemed to be a table
and two chairs; hanging above the table, what is called an
’electric-lamp’; and underneath it three ‘things’ exactly
alike, each resembling the ‘Momonodooar.’
“On the table and by the side of it, stood or lay several
different apparatuses and instruments unknown to me.
“Later it became clear that the said objects contained in
this Hrhaharhtzaha, as well as everything we had later to
put on, were made of special materials invented by this
Gornahoor Harharkh.
“And as regards these materials also, I shall explain a little
more in detail at the proper time in the course of my
further explanations concerning Gornahoor Harharkh.
“Meanwhile bear in mind that in the enormous Khrh
155
or workshop
of Gornahoor Harharkh there were, besides
the already mentioned Hrhaharhtzaha, several other large
independent appliances, and among them two quite special
what are called ‘Lifechakans’ which Gornahoor himself
called ‘Krhrrhihirhi.’
“It is interesting to note that your favorites also have
something like this ‘Lifechakan’ or ‘Krhrrhihirhi’; and
they name such an apparatus a ‘dynamo.’
“There was also there, apart, another independent
large appliance, which, as it afterwards appeared, was a
’Soloohnorahoona’ of special construction, or as your favorites
would say, a ‘pump-of-complex-construction-for-exhausting-
atmosphere-to-the-point-of-absolute-vacuum.’
“While I was looking over all this with surprise, Gornahoor
Harharkh himself approached the said pump of
special construction and with his left wing moved one of
its parts, owing to which a certain mechanism began to
work in the pump. He then approached us again and,
pointing with the same special feather of his right wing to
the largest Lifechakan, or Krhrrhihirhi, or dynamo, further
continued his explanations.
“He said, ‘By means of this special appliance, there
are first “sucked-in” separately from the atmosphere, or
from any intra- or surplanetary formation, all the three independent
parts of the Omnipresent-Active-Element-
Okidanokh present in it, and only afterwards when in a
certain way these separate independent parts are artificially
reblended in the Krhrrhihirhi into a single whole,
does the Okidanokh, now in its usual state, flow and is it
concentrated there, in that “container”’—saying which,
he again with the same special feather pointed to something
very much like what is called a ‘generator.’
“‘And then from there,’ he said, ‘Okidanokh flows here
into another Krhrrhihirhi or dynamo where it undergoes
the process of Djartklom, and each of its separate parts
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is concentrated there in those other containers’—and this
time he pointed to what resembled ‘accumulators’—’and
only then do I take from the secondary containers, by
means of various artificial appliances, each active part of
Okidanokh separately for my elucidatory experiments.
“‘I shall first demonstrate to you,” he continued, ‘one of
the results which occur when, for some reason or other,
one of the active parts of the Omnipresent-Okidanokh is
absent during the process of their “striving-to-reblend”
into a whole.
“‘At the present moment this special construction contains
a space which is indeed an absolute vacuum, obtained,
it must be said, only owing firstly to the special construction
of the suction pump and to the materials of special
quality of which the instruments are made, which alone
make experiments possible in an absolute vacuum; and secondly,
to the properties and the strength of the material of
which the walls of this part of my new invention are made.’
“Having said this, he pulled another lever and again
continued:
“‘Owing to the pulling of this lever, that process has begun
in this vacuum whereby in the separate parts of the
Omnipresent-Okidanokh there proceeds what is called
the “striving-to-reblend-into-a-whole.”
“‘But since, intentionally by an “able-Reason”—in the
present case myself—the participation of that third part of
Okidanokh existing under the name of “Parijrahatnatioose”
is artificially excluded from the said process, then this
process proceeds there just now between only two of its
parts, namely, between those two independent parts which
science names “Anodnatious” and “Cathodnatious.” And
in consequence, instead of the obligatory law-conformable
results of the said process, that non-law-conformable result
is now actualized which exists under the denomination
157
of “the-result-
of-the-process-of-the-reciprocal-destruction-of-
two-opposite-forces,” or as ordinary beings express it,
”the-cause-of-artificial-light.”
‘“The “striving-to-reblend-into-a-whole” of two active
parts of the Omnipresent-Okidanokh, which is proceeding
at the present moment there in this vacuum, has a
force, as calculated by objective science, of 3,040,000
what are called “volts,” and this force is indicated by the
needle of that special appliance there.’
“Pointing to a ‘something’ very much like the apparatus
existing also on your planet and called there Voltmeter’
he said:
“‘One of the advantages of this new invention of mine
for the demonstration of the given phenomenon is that in
spite of the unusual power of the process of the “force-of-
striving,” now proceeding there, the what are called
”Salnichizinooarnian-momenturn-vibrations,” which most
beings consider also to be “rays,” and which ought to be
obtained and to issue from this process, do not issue out
of the place of their arising, that is, out of this construction
in which the particularities of the Omnipresent-
Okidanokh are being elucidated.
‘“And in order that the beings who are outside of this
part of my invention may nevertheless also have the possibility
of elucidating the force of the given process, I intentionally
made the composition of the material of the wall
in one place such that it has the property of permitting
the passage through it of the said “Salnichizinooarnianmomentum-
vibrations” or “rays.”’
“Having said this, he approached nearer to the Hrahaharhtzaha
and pressed a certain button. The result was
that the whole of the enormous Khrh or ‘workshop’ was
suddenly so strongly lit up that our organs of sight temporarily
ceased to function, and only after a considerable
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time
had passed could we with great difficulty raise our
eyelids and look around.
“When we had recovered and Gornahoor Harharkh
had pulled still another lever, which resulted in the whole
surrounding space being restored to its former usual appearance,
he first, with his customary angel-voice, again
drew our attention to the Voltmeter,’ the needle of which
constantly indicated the same figure, and then continued:
“‘You see that, although the process of the clash of
two opposite component parts of the Omnipresent-
Okidanokh, of the same power of “force-of-striving” still
continues, and that the part of the surface of this construction
which has the property of admitting the passage
of the said “rays” is still open, yet in spite of all this there
is no longer the phenomenon which ordinary beings define
by the phrase “the-causes-of-artificial-light.”
‘“And this phenomenon is no longer there, only because
by my last pulling of a certain lever, I introduced into the
process of the clash of two component parts of Okidanokh,
a current of the third independent component part of Okidanokh,
which began to blend proportionally with its other
two parts, owing to which the result derived from this kind
of blending of the three component parts of the Omnipresent-
Okidanokh—unlike the process of the non-law-conformable
blending of its two parts—cannot be
perceived by beings with any of their being-functions.’ ”After all
these explanations of his, Gornahoor Harharkh
then proposed that I should venture to enter with him that
demonstrating part itself of his new invention, in order that
I might become, there within, an eyewitness of many particular
manifestations of the Omnipresent and everything-penetrating
Active-Element.
“Of course, without thinking long about it, I immediately
decided and gave him my consent.
“And I immediately decided, chiefly because I expected
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to obtain
in my being unchangeable and imperishable
’objective-essence-satisfaction.’
“When this future essence-friend of mine had my consent,
he at once gave the necessary orders to one of his assistants.
“It appeared that for the actualization of what he proposed,
various preparations had first to be made.
“First of all his assistants put on Gornahoor Harharkh
and myself some special, very heavy suits, resembling
those which your favorites call ‘diving suits’ but with
many small heads of what are called ‘bolts’ projecting, and
when these extremely peculiar suits had been put on us,
his assistants screwed up the heads of these bolts in a certain
order.
“On the inner side of these diving suits, at the ends of
the bolts, there were, it appeared, special plates which
pressed against parts of our planetary body in a certain
way.
“It later also became quite clear to me that this was necessary,
in order that there might not occur to our planetary
bodies what is called ‘Taranooranura,’ or, as it might
otherwise be said, in order that our planetary bodies
should not fall to pieces as usually occurs to sur- and
intraplanetary formations of every kind when they happen
to come into an entirely atmosphereless space.
“In addition to these special suits, they placed on our
heads a ‘something’ resembling what is called a ‘diver’s
helmet,’ but with very complicated, what are called ‘connectors’
projecting from them.
“One of these connectors, which was called the
’Harhrinhrarh,’ meaning ‘sustainer-of-the-pulsation,’ was
something long, like a rubber tube. One end of it, by
means of complicated appliances on the helmet itself, was
hermetically attached to the corresponding place of the helmet
for the breathing organs, while the other end, after we
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had
already entered that strange Hrhaharhtzaha, was
screwed to an apparatus there, which was connected in its
turn with the space, the ‘presence’ of which corresponded
to the second being-food.
“Between Gornahoor Harharkh and myself there was
also a special connector, through which we could easily
communicate with each other while we were inside the
Hrhaharhtzaha, from which the atmosphere was pumped
out to make a vacuum.
“One end of this connector also, by means of appliances
that were on the helmets, was fitted in a certain way
to what are called my organs of ‘hearing’ and ‘speech,’ and
the other end was fitted to the same organs of Gornahoor
Harharkh.
“Thus, by means of this connector between my subsequent
essence-friend and myself, there was set up, as again
your favorites would say, a peculiar ‘telephone.’
“Without this appliance we could not have communicated
with each other in any way, chiefly because Gornahoor
Harharkh was at that time still a being with a
presence perfected only up to the state called the ‘Sacred
Inkozarno’; and a being with such a presence not only
cannot manifest himself in an absolutely empty space, but
he cannot even exist in it, even though the products of all
the three being-foods be artificially introduced into him
in such a space.
“But the most ‘curious’ and, as it is said, the most ‘cunningly
ingenious’ of all the connectors there for various
purposes on those strange diving suits and helmets was
the connector created by that great scientist Gornahoor
Harharkh to enable the ‘organ-of-sight’ of ordinary beings
to perceive the visibility of all kinds of surrounding objects
in an ‘absolutely-empty-space.’
“One end of this astonishing connector was fitted in a
certain way, also by means of appliances on the helmets,
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to our temples, while the other end was joined to what is
called the ‘Amskomoutator,’ which in its turn was joined
in a certain way by means of what are called ‘wires’ to all
the objects within the Hrhaharhtzaha as well as to those
outside, namely, to those objects whose visibility was
needed during the experiments.
“It is very interesting to notice here that to each end
of that appliance—a creation almost incredible for ordinary
three-centered-being-Reason—two independent connectors,
also of wire, were led, and through them,
what are called special magnetic currents flowed from outside.
“As it was afterwards explained to me in detail, these
connectors and the said special ‘magnetic-currents’ had, it
seems, been created by that truly great scientist Gornahoor
Harharkh in order that the presences of learned three-centered
beings—even those not perfected to the Sacred
Inkozarno—might, owing to one property of the ‘magnetic
current,’ be ‘reflected’ for their own essences and that, owing
to another property of this current, the presence of the
mentioned objects might also be ‘reflected,’ so that thereby
the perception of the reality of the said objects might be actualized
by their imperfect organs of being-sight in a vacuum
containing none of these factors or those results of
various cosmic concentrations which have received such vibrations,
from the actualization of which alone the functioning
of any being-organ whatsoever is possible.
“Having fitted upon us the said very heavy appliances for
enabling beings to exist in a sphere not corresponding for
them, the assistants of this, then still great all-universal scientist
Gornahoor Harharkh, with the help again of special
appliances, carried us into the Hrhaharhtzaha itself; and
having screwed up all the free ends of the connectors projecting
from us to the corresponding apparatuses in the
Hrhaharhtzaha itself, went out and hermetically closed
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behind them the only way by which it was still possible,
if at all, to have any communication with what is called
the ‘Everything-representing-one-world.’
“When we were alone in the Hrhaharhtzaha itself, Gornahoor
Harharkh, after turning one of what are called
’switches’ there, said:
“‘The work of the “pump” has already begun, and soon
it will have pumped out all the results here without exception
of those cosmic processes, whatever they may be,
the totality of the results of which is the basis and significance,
as well as the process itself, of the maintenance of
the existence of everything existing in the whole of this
”Everything-representing-one-world.”’
“And he added in a half-sarcastic tone: ‘Soon we shall
be absolutely isolated from everything existing and functioning
in the whole of the Universe; but, on the other
hand, owing firstly to my new invention, and secondly to
the knowledge we have already attained for ourselves, we
have not only now the possibility of returning to the said
world, to become again a particle of all that exists, but
also we shall soon be worthy to become nonparticipating
eyewitnesses of certain of these World-laws, which for ordinary
uninitiated three-centered beings are what they call
”great-inscrutable-mysteries-of-Nature” but which in reality
are only natural and very simple results “automatically-flowing-
one-from-the-other.
“While he was speaking, one could feel that this
pump—another also very important part of the whole of
his new invention—was perfectly actualizing the work assigned
to it by this being with Reason.
“To enable you to represent to yourself and understand
better the perfection of this part also of the whole of this
new invention of Gornahoor Harharkh, I must not fail to
tell you also about the following:
“Although I personally, as a three-brained being also,
163
had had occasion many times before, owing to certain
quite particular reasons, to be in atmosphereless spaces
and had had to exist, sometimes for a long time, by
means of the Sacred ‘Kreemboolazoomara’ alone; and although
from frequent repetition, a habit had been acquired
in my presence of moving from one sphere to
another gradually and almost without feeling any inconvenience
from the change in the presence of the ‘second-being-

food’ occurring with the change of the presences of
cosmic substances undergoing transformation and which
are always around both large and small cosmic concentrations;
and also, although the causes themselves of my
arising and the subsequent process of my being-existence
were arranged in an entirely special way, in consequence
of which the various being-functions contained within
my common presence had perforce gradually become also
special, yet nevertheless, in spite of it all, the pumping
out of the atmosphere by the said ‘pump’ then proceeded
with such force that such sensations were impressed on
the separate parts of the whole of my presence that even
today I can very clearly experience the process of the
flow of my state at that time and relate it to you almost
in detail.
“This extremely strange state began in me shortly after
Gornahoor Harharkh had spoken in a half-sarcastic tone
about our imminent situation.
“In all my three ‘being-centers’—namely, in the three
centers localized in the presence of every three-centered being,
and which exist under the names of’Thinking,’ ‘Feeling,’
and ‘Moving’ centers—there began to be perceived
separately and independently in each of them in a very
strange and unusual way very definite impressions that
there was taking place in the separate parts of my whole
planetary body an independent process of the sacred ‘Rascooarno,’
and that the cosmic crystallizations which
164
composed
the presences of these parts were flowing ‘in vain.`
“At first, what is called my ‘initiative-of-constatation’
proceeded in the usual way, that is, according to what is
called the ‘center-of-gravity-of-associative-experiencing,’
but later, when this initiative-of-constatation of everything
proceeding in me gradually and almost imperceptibly
became the function of my essence alone, the latter

not only became the unique all-embracing initiator of the
constating of everything proceeding in me, but also
everything, without exception, of that which newly proceeded
began to be perceived by and fixed in this essence
of mine.
“From the moment that my essence began to perceive
impressions directly and to constate independently that,
from what was proceeding, there was being entirely destroyed,
as it were, in my common presence, firstly, the
parts of my planetary body, and then, little by little, also
the localizations of the ‘second’ and ‘third’ being-centers.
At the same time, a constatation was definitely made that
the functioning of these latter centers passed gradually to
my ‘thinking-center’ and became proper to it, with the
consequence that the ‘thinking-center,’ with the increasing
intensity of its functioning, became the ‘unique-powerful-
perceiver’ of everything actualized outside of
itself and the autonomous initiator of the constating of
everything proceeding in the whole of my presence as
well as outside of it.
“While this strange, and to my Reason then, still incomprehensible
being-experiencing was proceeding in me,
Gornahoor Harharkh himself was occupied in pulling
some ‘levers’ and ‘switches,’ of which there were very
many at the edges of the table where we were placed.
“An incident which happened to Gornahoor Harharkh
himself changed all this being-experiencing of mine, and
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in
my common presence the usual ‘inner-being-experiencing’was resumed.
“The following is what happened:
“Gornahoor Harharkh, with all those unusual heavy
appliances which had been put on him as well, suddenly
found himself at a certain height above the chair and
began to flounder, as our dear Mullah Nassr Eddin says,
’like-a-puppy-who-has-fallen-into-a-deep-pond.’
“As it afterwards proved, my friend Gornahoor
Harharkh had made a mistake while pulling the mentioned
levers and switches and had made certain parts of
his planetary body more tense than was necessary. In consequence,
his presence together with everything on him
had received a shock and also the momentum given by the
shock, and, owing to the ‘tempo’ proceeding in his presence
from taking in the ‘second-being-food’ and to the
absence of any resistance in that absolutely empty space,
he began to drift, or, as I have already said, to flounder
like a ‘puppy-who-has-fallen-into-a-deep-pond.’”
Having said this with a smile, Beelzebub became silent;
a little later he made a very strange gesture with his left
hand, and with an intonation not proper to his own voice,
he continued:
“While I am gradually recalling and telling you about
all this concerning the events of a period of my existence
now long since past, the wish arises in me to make a sincere
confession to you—just to you, one of my direct
heirs who must inevitably represent the sum of all my
deeds during the periods of the process of my past being-existence—
and namely, I wish sincerely to confess to you
that when my essence, with the participation of the parts
of my presence, subject to it alone, had independently
decided to take a personal part in those scientific elucidatory
experiments with the demonstrating part of the new
invention of Gornahoor Harharkh, and I had entered
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into this
demonstrating part without the least compulsion
from outside, yet, in spite of it all, my essence allowed to
creep into my being and to be developed, side by side
with the said strange experiencings, a criminally egoistic
anxiety for the safety of my personal existence.
“However, my boy, in order that you may not at this
moment be too distressed, it is not superfluous to add that
this happened in me then for the first and also for the last
time during all the periods of my being-existence.
“But perhaps it would be better for the present not
to touch on questions that concern exclusively only our
family.
“Let us rather return to the tale I have begun about the
Omnipresent-Okidanokh and my essence-friend Gornahoor
Harharkh, who was, by the way, at one time considered
everywhere among ordinary three-brained beings
as a ‘great-scientist,’ and is now, though he still continues
to exist, not only considered not ‘great,’ but thanks to his
own result, that is to say, to his own son, is what our dear
Mullah Nassr Eddin would call a ‘has-been’ or, as he
sometimes says in such cases, ‘He-is-already-sitting-in-an-old-
American-galosh.’
“Well, then, while floundering, Gornahoor Harharkh,
with great difficulty, and only by means of a special and
very complicated maneuver which he made, finally managed
to get his planetary body, burdened with the various
unusually heavy appliances, down onto the chair again,
and this time he fixed it all with the aid of special screws
which were on the chair for that purpose; and when we
were both more or less arranged and communication was
possible between us by means of the said artificial connectors,
he first drew my attention to those apparatuses hanging over the
table which I told you were very
much like the Momonodooars.
“On close inspection all these were alike in appearance
167
and served as three identical ‘sockets,’ from the ends of
each of which, ‘carbon-candles’ projected, such as are usually
to be found in the apparatuses which your favorites
call ‘electric-arc-lamps.’
“Having drawn my attention to these three socket-like
Momonodooars, he said:
“‘Each of these externally similar apparatuses has a direct
connection with those secondary containers which I
pointed out to you while we were still outside and in
which, after the artificial Djartklom, each of the active
parts of Okidanokh collects into a general mass.
“‘I have adapted these three independent apparatuses in
such a way that, there in this absolutely empty space,
we can obtain from those secondary containers for the
required experiment as much as we wish of every active
part of Okidanokh in a pure state, and also we can at will
change the force of the “striving-to-reblend-into-a-whole,”
which is acquired in them and which is proper to
them according to the degree of density of the concentration
of the mass.
“‘And here, within this absolutely empty space, I shall
first of all show you that same non-law-conformable phenomenon
which we recently observed while we were out-side
the place where it proceeded. And namely, I
shall again demonstrate to you this World-phenomenon which
occurs when, after a law-conformable Djartklom, the
separate parts of the whole Okidanokh meet in a space outside
of alaw-conformable arising and, without the participation of one
part, “strive-to-reblend-into-a-whole.”’
“Having said this, he first closed that part of the surface
of the Hrhaharhtzaha, the composition of which had
the property of allowing ‘rays’ to pass through it; then he
pulled two switches and pressed a certain button, as a result
of which the small plate lying on that table, composed
of a certain special mastic, automatically moved
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toward the mentioned carbon-candles; and then having
again drawn my attention to the Ammeter and the Voltmeter,
he added: ’”I have again admitted the influx of parts of
the Oki-danokh, namely, the Anodnatious and the
Cathodnatious of equal force of “striving-to-reblend.”’
“When I looked at the Ammeter and the Voltmeter and
indeed saw that their needles moved and stopped on the
same figures I had noticed the first time we were still
outside the Hrhaharhtzaha, I was greatly surprised, because
in spite of the indications of the needles and the
intimation of Gornahoor Harharkh himself, I had neither
noticed nor sensed any change in the degree of my perception
of the visibility of the surrounding objects.
“So, without waiting for his further explanations, I
asked him:
“‘But why then is there no result from this non-law-
conformable “striving-to-reblend-into-a-whole,” of the
parts of the Okidanokh?’
“Before replying to this question, he turned off the only
lamp, which worked from a special magnetic current. My
astonishment increased still more, because in spite of the
darkness which instantly ensued, it could clearly be seen
through the walls of the Hrhaharhtzaha, that the needles
of the Ammeter and Voltmeter still stood in their former
places.
“Only after I had somehow got accustomed to such a
surprising constatation, Gornahoor Harharkh said:
“‘I have already told you that the composition of the
material of which the walls of this construction in which
we are at this moment are made, possesses the property
of not allowing any vibrations arising from any source
whatsoever to pass through it, with the exception of certain
vibrations arising from nearby concentrations; and
these latter vibrations can be perceived by the organs of
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sight of
three-brained beings, and even then of course,
only of normal beings.
“‘Furthermore, according to the law called “Heteratogetar,”
the “Salnichizinooarnian-momentum-vibrations”
or “rays” acquire the property of acting on the organs
of perception of beings only after they have passed a
limit defined by science in the following formula: “the-result-
of-the-manifestation-is-proportionate-to-the-force-of-
striving-received-from-the-shock.”
“‘And so, as the given process of the clash of the two
parts of the Okidanokh has the strength of great power,
the result of the clash is manifested much further than the
place of its arising.
“‘Now look!’
“Having said this, he pressed some other button, and
suddenly the whole interior of the Hrhaharhtzaha was
filled with the same blinding light which, as I have already
told you, I experienced when I was outside the Hrhaharhtzaha.
“It appeared that the said light was obtained because by
pressing this button, Gornahoor Harharkh had again
opened that part of the wall of the Hrhaharhtzaha which
had the property of permitting ‘rays’ to pass through it. ”As he
explained further, the light was only a consequence
of the result of the ‘striving-to-reblend-into-a-whole’
of the parts of Okidanokh proceeding in that
absolutely empty space within the Hrhaharhtzaha and
manifested owing to what is called ‘reflection’ from outside
back to the place of its arising.
“After this he continued as follows:
“‘I shall now demonstrate to you how and by what
combinations of the processes of Djartklom and of the
striving-to-reblend-into-a-whole of the active parts of
Okidanokh, there arise in planets from what are called the
”minerals” which compose their interior presence, definite
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formations
of varying densities, as for instance, “mineraloids,”
“gases,” “metalloids,” “metals,” and so on; how
these latter are afterwards transformed owing to these
same factors one into another; and how the vibrations
flowing from these transformations constitute just that
”totality-of-vibrations” which gives the planets themselves the
possibility of stability in the process called the

”Common-system-harmonious-movement.”
“‘For my proposed demonstrating I must obtain, as I
always do, the necessary materials from outside, which my
pupils will give me by means of appliances which I have
prearranged.’
“It is interesting to remark that while he was speaking,
he was at the same time tapping with his left foot on a
certain ‘something,’ very much like what your favorites
call the famous Morse transmission apparatus—famous be
it said, of course, only on the planet Earth.
“And a little later there slowly ascended from the lower
part of the Hrhaharhtzaha a small something like a box,
also with transparent walls, within which, as it proved
later, were certain minerals, metalloids, metals, and various
gases in liquid and solid states.
“Then with the aid of various appliances which were at
one side of the table, he first of all, with complicated manipulation,
took out from the box some what is called ‘red
copper’ and placed it on the mentioned plate, and then
said:
‘“This metal is a definite planetary crystallization and is
one of the densities required for the said stability in the process
called the Common-system-harmonious-movement.
It is a formation from preceding processes of the action of
the parts of the Omnipresent-Okidanokh; and at the present
moment I wish to allow the subsequent transformation
of this metal to proceed artificially and acceleratedly
by means of the peculiarities of the same factors.
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“‘I wish to aid artificially the evolution and involution
of its elements towards a greater density, or, on the contrary,
towards their transformation back to a primal state.
“‘To make the picture of the further elucidatory experiments
clearer to you, I find I must first inform you, even
if only briefly, of my first personal scientific deductions
concerning the evidence of the causes and conditions owing
to which there proceeds in the planets themselves the
crystallizing of separate parts of the Okidanokh in these
or the other said definite formations.
“‘Evidently first of all from any non-law-conformable
Djartklom of the Omnipresent-Okidanokh which is in
the presence of every planet, its separate parts are localized
in the medium of that part of the presence of the planet,
that is to say, in that mineral which was at the given moment
in the place where the said non-law-conformable
Djartklom occurred.
‘“And so if what is called the “vibration-of-the-density-of-
the-elements-of-the-said-medium” has an “affinity-of-
vibration” with the said active part of the
Omnipresent-Okidanokh, then according to the Worldlaw
called “Symmetrical-entering,” this active part blends
with the presence of the said medium and becomes an inseparable
part of it. And from that moment, the given
parts of the Omnipresent-Okidanokh begin, together
with the said elements of the said medium, to represent
the corresponding densities required in planets, that is to
say, various kinds of metalloids or even metals, as for instance,
the metal I have placed in this sphere, and in
which there will proceed artificially at this moment, at my
wish, the action of striving-to-reblend-into-a-whole of the
parts of the Okidanokh, and which metal, as I have already
said, exists under the name of red-copper.
“And further, having arisen in the planets in this way,
the said various metalloids and metals then begin according
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to
the common-universal-law called “Reciprocal-feeding-of-
everything-existing”—as it is generally proper to arisings
of every kind in which Okidanokh or any of its active
parts participates—to radiate from their presences the results
of their inner “Interchange-of-substances.” And as is
proper to radiations of every kind issuing from sur- and
intraplanetary formations that have acquired in their
vi
brations the property of Okidanokh or of its active parts,
and which are in what is called the “center-of-gravity” of
every such said formation, the radiations of these metalloids
and metals possess properties almost similar to the
properties of Okidanokh itself or of one or another of its
active parts.
“‘When the said masses of different densities that have
thus arisen in planets under normal surrounding conditions
radiate from their common presences the vibrations
required for the said World-law of Reciprocal-feeding-of-
everything-existing, then, among these vibrations of
various properties there is established, owing to the fundamental
World-law “Troemedekhfe,” a reciprocally acting
contact.
“‘And the result of this contact is the chief factor in the
gradual change of the various densities in planets.
“‘My observations over many years have almost fully
convinced me that it is owing only to the said contact
and its results that there is actualized the “Stability-of-harmonious-
equilibrium-of-planets.” ”’This metal red-copper
which I have placed in the sphere of my proposed artificial actualization
of the action of the active parts of Okidanokh, has at this
moment what is called a “specific-density,” reckoning from the
unit of density of the sacred element Theomertmalogos, of 444,
that is to say, the atom of this metal was 444 times more dense,
and as much less vivifying, than the atom of the sacred
Theomertmalogos.
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‘“Now see in what order its artificially accelerated transformations
will proceed.’
“Having said this, he first fixed before my organ of
sight the automatically moving Teskooano and then turned
on and off various switches in a certain sequence; and as
I looked through the Teskooano he explained to me as
follows:
“‘At this moment I admit the “influx” of all three parts
of Okidanokh into the sphere containing this metal; and
as all three parts have the same “density” and, hence, the
same “force-of-striving,” they reblend into a whole in this
sphere without changing anything in the presence of the
metal; and the Omnipresent-Okidanokh thus obtained
flows in its usual state through a special connection out of
the Hrhaharhtzaha and is reconcentrated in the first container
which you have already seen.
“‘Now look!
“‘I deliberately increase the force-of-striving of only one
of the active parts of the Okidanokh; for example, I increase
the force called Cathodnatious. In consequence of
this, you see that the elements composing the presence
of that red copper begin to involve towards the quality of
the substances that compose the ordinary presences of
planets.’
“As he explained this, he at the same time turned on
and off various switches in a certain sequence.
“Although, my boy, I then looked very attentively at
everything proceeding, and everything I saw was impressed
in my essence ‘Pestolnootiarly,’ that is, forever, yet
nevertheless, not even with my best wish could I now describe
to you in words a hundredth part of what then proceeded
in that small fragment of a definite intraplanetary
formation.
“And I will not try to put into words for you what I
then saw, because I have just thought of a possibility of
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soon
actually showing it all to you when you also can be
an eyewitness of so strange and astonishing a cosmic
process.
“But I will tell you meanwhile that there proceeded in
that fragment of red copper something rather like those
terrifying pictures which I occasionally observed among
your favorites on the planet Earth through my Teskooano
from Mars.
“I said ‘rather-like’ because what occasionally proceeded
among your favorites had a visibility only possible
of observation at its beginning, whereas in the fragment
of red copper the visibility was continuous until the final
completion of transformation.
“A rough parallel can be drawn between the occasional
proceedings on your planet and the proceedings then in
that small fragment of copper, if you imagine yourself
high up and looking down upon a large public square,
where thousands of your favorites, seized with the most
intense form of their chief psychosis, are destroying each
other’s existence by all kinds of means invented by them
themselves, and that in their places there immediately appear
what are called their ‘corpses,’ which owing to the
outrages done to them by the beings who are not yet destroyed,
change color very perceptibly, as a result of which
the general visibility of the surface of the said large square
is gradually changed.
“Then, my boy, this subsequent essence-friend of mine,
Gornahoor Harharkh, by means of switching on and off
the influx of the three active parts of Okidanokh and
changing their force-of-striving, also changed the density
of the elements of the said metal and thereby transformed
the red copper into all the other also definite intraplanetary
metals of lower or higher degree of vivifyingness.
“And here, for the elucidation of the strangeness of the
psyche of the three-brained beings who have taken your
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fancy, it is very important and interesting to note that
while Gornahoor Harharkh was, with the aid of his new
invention, artificially and deliberately producing the evolution
and involution of the density and vivifyingness of
the elements of red copper, I noticed very clearly that this
metal was transformed once upon the said plate into just
that same definite metal about which the sorry-savants of
your planet have been wiseacring during nearly the whole
of their arising and existing, in the hope of transforming
other metals into this metal, and thus constantly leading
astray their already sufficiently erring brethren.
“This metal is called there—’gold.’
“Gold is no other than the metal we call ‘Prtzathalavr,’
the specific weight of which, reckoning from the element
of the sacred Theomertmalogos, is 1439; that is to say, its
element is three and a fraction times less vivifying than
the element of the metal red copper.
“Why I suddenly decided not to try to explain to you
in detail in words all that then took place in the fragment
of the said red copper, in view of my suggestion of the
possibility of soon actually showing you in definite intraplanetary
formations the processes of various combinations
of the manifestations of the active parts of
Okidanokh, was because I suddenly remembered the
all-gracious promise given me by our All-Quarters-
Maintainer, the Most Great Archcherub, Peshtvogner.
“And this all-gracious promise was given me, as soon
as I returned from exile and had to present myself first
of all to His All-Quarters-Maintainer, the Archcherub
Peshtvogner, and prostrated myself to produce before him
what is called the ‘Essence-Sacred-Aliamizoornakalu.’
“This I had to do on account of the same sins of my
youth. And I was obliged to do so, because when I was pardoned
by HIS UNI-BEING ENDLESSNESS and allowed to return
to my native land, certain Sacred Individuals decided
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to demand of me, for any eventuality, to have performed
over my essence this sacred process in order that I might
not manifest myself as in the days of my youth, and that
the same might not thereby occur again in the Reason of
most individuals dwelling here at the center of the Great
Universe.
“You probably do not know yet what the Sacred-
Aliamizoornakalu over an essence means? I shall later explain
it to you in detail but meanwhile I shall simply use
the words of our dear Mullah Nassr Eddin who explains
this process as ‘giving-one’s-word-of-honor-not-to-poke-one’s-
nose-into-the-affairs-of-the-authorities.’
“In short, when I presented myself to His All-Quarters-
Maintainer, he deigned to ask me, among other things,
whether I had taken with me all the being-productions
which had interested me and which I had collected from
various planets of that solar system where I existed during
my exile.
“I replied that I had taken almost everything, except
those cumbersome apparatuses which my friend Gornahoor
Harharkh had constructed for me on the planet
Mars.
“He at once promised to give orders that everything I
should indicate should be taken at the first opportunity
on the next trip of the space-ship Omnipresent.
“That is why, my boy, I hope that everything necessary
will be brought to our planet Karatas so that, when we return
there, you will be able to see it all with your own
eyes, and I shall be able to explain everything in detail,
practically.
“And meanwhile, during our traveling here on the
space-ship Karnak, I shall, as I have already promised you,
tell you in their order about my descents there to your
planet and also about the causes of what is called my
’appearances-there-in-person.’”
Subpages (1): Ch 19
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