programming and mind control (part 1)

this morning (july 31 2010) i woke up with a bunch of images flashing through my head, you know - during that time when you are waking up but not awake. the ones my mind naturally latched onto were the ones which might be scenery from earth. specifically the desert image of open sandy ground with sparce patches of long thin bladed grass. this was an obvious one to notice most because it's visually simple, non threatening and could be from america (or in my case earth as i'm not an american). 

i recognise what this is. some preprogammed sequence which was triggered to make my memories "disappear", although i haven't been abducted lately. what the "flashes" do in my case is make every day events, and everything else for that matter, harder to recall. in other words i just forget things. 

but this time i tried to mentally latch on a image to hold it in my mind while physically i was still in that very relaxed state. the one i "grabbed" didn't look like anything at first but i knew it was a face. then i saw it - a classic movie alien marsian face (long with almost conical pointy head and sour expression). then it became a human face, that of an american, trim middle aged with grey sideburns. and in military uniform, smiling pleasently. but i knew there was more and fought to see it. 

the third face was reptoid - scaled, squarish, small distinct eyes. but again i knew there was more and by this stage was fighting to see anything else at all, or keep any image at all in my mind. but the image did twist, and i almost saw it. a reptilian face, not reptoid (reptilians don't have a scaly skin), eyes more like ours. i almost saw it, but i lost the struggle and physically i was becoming more aware of my surroundings. 

i have resolved to fight this kind of recalled programming (which must have been triggered mentally or aurally) by either imagining a bright light instead to burn out the images or by trying to lock onto it and trying to see what it really is. 

i am a terrible artist. i have no ability all (is that because of them?) so i wrote notes instead. i might scan the page and put that up later. because i have identified their image techniques and even a couple of poorly drawn scratchings will help demonstrate it.