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1951 - Sun 13 Oct 2019 - Cairnton Wood - Hare: T-Rex Cock - Scribe: Numskull

Aberdeen Hash House Harriers

Run 1951

Sunday 13th October 2019

Cairnton Wood

Hare - T Rex Cock

The following contains a description of events that some readers might find upsetting.

A nice sunny day, considering the weather forecast. Though, a long line of dark clouds to the south, where some were obviously receiving the forecast.

The Dutchess was awarded scribe. Then immediately (and gracefully) awarded it on to a delighted yours truly.

There was a pre-run award and DD to Not Dot for 50 runs. Well done that lady (It was 150 runs, get a grip.Ed).

T-Rex Cock explained the run. It would be a woodland walk / run. Those that didn’t like trails in the woods wouldn’t like it. Those that liked trails in the woods wouldn’t like it. (That’s you banged to rights on both counts. Ed)

So the run set off through the woods. All the way around one side of Cairnton Wood and then back around the other side of Cairnton Wood very close to the outward trail through the woods. Extremely clever. Most thought we’d never get out of the woods.

Some missed the beer check because of the dense woods - well, ‘tough titty’ on that one. (the beers check had been moved according to the hare!!!. Ed)

Back at the circle for DDs (in no particular order).

  • A long story about Barbarella and 2nd hand shoes and palming off cheap shoes to other new and un-suspecting hashers and maybe flood or blood or something, during which my attention span was exceeded
  • Hippo, for gate crashing athletes being filmed up Bennachie, and admitting to not being one of them
  • Aids noted that he had walked in dog poo. There was then a long inquisition to find the guilty party and an Antika was eventually nailed. However, true to any proper inquisition, all dog owners were punished. Hippo sang a song about doggy assholes (see below) - which we all liked (the song, that is)
  • Aids then decided to give me a down-down for - ‘not realising that it was not me, but The Dutchess who was scribe, and so why was I busy taking notes and asking everyone “what happed - who got a DD?”’ I noted that, when a lady says “you’re doin’ it”, that’s it - end of ……… and wondered why he still hadn’t cottoned on to such evidential truth by his stage in life. A bystander was heard to utter wearily “So do I, keep tellin’ him”
  • And so to the celebrity down-down of the day. Well known TV and multi-media star, Cinders, had received extensive exposure on the goggle box for sucking up to Nicola Sturgeon (yeugh). A well-deserved down-down in my humble view
  • DD to the hare for an excellent job done down in the woods [and post run thanks for the usual great hospitality from him and the good Aberdeen HHH Bypass Club lady, back at Sangara.

The Penguin then sadly announced the death of Darwin Don at age of 96. He had recently jumped out of a plane at 12,000ft on his birthday. RIP honourable hasher ††.

 

Numskull

 

….. and now (yawn!!)

 

Horrible History Lesson for Run 1951 (courtesy of Sir Deadmund Hillary)

 

Well, Sir D missed the run so, (yawn!!) no Horrible History

♪ The Doggies' Meeting ♫

The doggies held a meeting
They came from near and far
Some came by motorcycle
And some by motorcar

 

Each doggy passed the entrance
Each doggy signed the book
Then each undid his asshole
And hung it on a hook

 

One dog was not invited
It sorely raised his ire
So he ran into the meeting hall
And loudly bellowed "Fire!"

 

It threw all in confusion
And without a second look
Each doggy grabbed an asshole
From any handy hook

 

And that's the reason why, sir
When walking down the street
And that's the reason why, sir
When doggies chance to meet

 

And that's the reason why, sir
On land or sea or foam
Doggies sniff another's asshole
To see if it's their own.

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