Love's Bitter Aftertaste Chapter 1

By Rochelle Raphaela Celesta
February 26, 2024

(Pieces of poetry/share in a “Diary” inspired by music lyrics)

Love's Bitter Aftertaste  

CHAPTER  I 

22th December 2022

“HEARTBROKEN (PT I)”

It took me ten gloomy moons

To realize that the sun has set forever

Allow me to refine

So you would know,

Well at least someone will know

That I was a very, foolish person

Admiring you from afar was painful

Your glance,

And the cold breeze

Felt strange but I know of him,

Bitterly didn’t know who he is

Or who he was for

I know I shouldn’t have done this

But was I wrong for not knowing?

In the end, it was criminal love

As I have fallen for a friend’s lover

-Elle Kim

Credit : (Criminal Love, performed by Enhypen)

*****

24th January 2023

“HEARTBROKEN (PT II)”

And here I am again, 

Being a very, foolish person

I thought I’d met a new prince

But I knew I didn’t have a chance

Because she took the chance, 

First come, first go

I let her,

I let her take the chance

I encouraged her 

But yet I ignore myself,

And I’m back to being more alone

It was just another fantasy,

Because I loved her more 

And the prince was no longer to see

Maybe I’ll sleep with an uncertain feeling

But I will get over it,

I will

That's what I always do

Getting heartbroken again

-Elle Kim

*****

1st February 2023

“DANDELIONS”

Dearest to whoever reading this

I retell a tale

About a funny boy

Who always gets his way of everything

He can be a menace,

Enough to get you annoyed

  months ago he confessed his love

And now living in his happiest moments,

not really… 

He didn’t actually know what love is

It was just a rose being picked out from the garden

Only to be adored,

But not nurtured

So the rose did not grow

Because the rose and him both knew

That he was in the field of dandelions

And he sang quietly,

“ I wanna hold you when I’m not supposed to,

When I’m lying close to someone else”

He has wished on dandelions all the time, 

All the time,

All this time.

-Elle Kim

Credit : (Dandelions performed by Ruth B)

****

5th February 2023

“The one that could break my heart”

I’ve always been the one to say the first goodbye

Had to love and lose a hundred million times

An unknown message caught my eye

My feelings might lose another dime

One day I was in a sorrow

He only said “Hello”

I replied on that night, 

And said to myself, “Can’t I just play along for a while ?”

Oh no, my friends warned me 

“He’s the guy who played with every girl in town”

I smirked the reddest flag I could be

Because I’m tired of giving up love for someone else

I wanna feel romance, even if it's not real 

It’s mischievous, I know

But for the first time, 

I get to have someone’s attention

I’m falling, are you falling too?

Just curious, but if not, that’s okay

Since we’re just playing along

Hey don’t blame me,

You started this 

It's you in my reflection

And now I’m afraid of all the things it could do to me

I was doing better alone

But when you said “Hello”

I know that was the end of it all

-Elle Kim

Credit : (Break My Heart, performed by Dua Lipa)

*****

14th February 2023

“A Day Before Valentine's”

I have nothing to share in this valentine, 

At least not about me

A plot has made Shawn in distress

He was alone on valentines day

Ranged with anger and mixed emotions he says

Boys can have dilemmas, too

Well, in love, of course.

A day before valentines,

Shawn came up to her

Slammed her into a goddamn wall

In a quiet yet nerve-racking library

Whispers a loud to her beautiful face and said,

“I know I can treat you better than he can,

And any girl like you deserves a gentleman.

Tell me why are we wasting time,

All of your wasted cryin’

When you should be with me instead”

His hands trying to hold hers

Both eyes are begging so much

Trying to tell her heart

To see that her lover is not the one 

“I just wanna give the love that you’re missing,

Tell me what you want to do

Give me a sign, take my hand, we’ll be fine

Promise I won’t let you down

‘Cause I know I can treat you better,

than he can…”

-Elle Kim

Credit : (Treat You Better, performed by Shawn Mendez)

*****

18th February 2023

“Still not over with”

Yes,

I lied

This gonna hurt,

But I blame myself first

‘Cause I ignored the truth

Drunk of that love, my head up

There’s no forgetting you

Every time I look at him

Her shadow appears in my darkest mind

The fear of what would come if I ever broke the code

I secretly burry my feelings

As they grow deeper that makes my heart ache 

Honestly, I have nothing left.

Me?

Me, fall in love with you?

That’s right 

I did,

I absolutely did

Either way, I loved you, 

dangerously.

-Elle Kim

Credit : (Dangerously, performed by Charlie Puth)

*****

26th February 2023

“My journey continues”

The one that could break my heart,

Yes, it's him again.

He faced me,

“Where you’ve been?

I could show you incredible things

Magic, Madness, Heaven, Sin”

Saw him there and I thought,

You look like my next mistake

He smiled, “Wanna play?”

What can I say?

I know you heard about me,

So hey, let's be friends

I'm dying to see how this one ends

But I can make the bad guys good for a weekend

He only wants love if it’s torture

Like I said, I just want to play along

Just for a little while…. 

-Elle Kim 

Credit : (Blank Space, performed by Taylor Swift)

******

(to be continued)