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By: Serenity Cannon

I stood there simply staring at her. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. I wish that she was mine, more than anything. But she wasn’t mine, in fact, she was dead. And it was all because of me. 

We didn’t talk very much. We only had 3 classes together, and I had seen her in passing. It all started on the first day of school. We had 3rd period together. It was an English class. I sat in the back, and she sat in the seat right in front of me. The first thing I noticed about her was the way her beautiful blond hair sat on her shoulders. It smelled like strawberries. The teacher had instructed that we should work together as partners in order to find out more about each other. I watched as she looked around and quickly realised that she had no one she knew to work with; so as a last resort, she turned around and looked at me. In the future she would tell me that it was the worst mistake she had ever made. 

She turned to me and asked if I wanted to work with her. It was my first time ever seeing her face, so I just looked at her in awe. She had the most beautiful blue eyes in the world that I got lost in every time I looked at her. She had rosy cheeks and a perfectly white toothy smile that shined whenever she laughed. She asked again, and that snapped me out of my trance. I sheepishly said yes and blushed with embarrassment. She introduced herself to me, 

"I’m Erica.” We shook hands and I introduced myself to her, “I’m Sam.” And that started it all. I fell in love with her. 

I tried to talk to her every chance I could get. I asked her for help on assignments even if I knew the material. Even if I knew what she was telling me was wrong, I still listened to her and hung onto every word that she said as though her words were gospel. Pretty soon we had gotten close, and before I knew it we were talking as though we were best friends. In every class that we had together, we sat next to each other and talked. She would always tell me about her day, and I would tell her about mine. We would laugh together and make inside jokes. I thought she felt the same way about me that I had felt about her, that was until she told me about another boy. 

We were sitting in our 5th period class together; and as she was telling me about her day, she told me about a boy that was in her 1st period with her. His name was Anthony. She told me that they had gotten close. They ate lunch together, walked to class together, hung out after school together, and went to football games together. The way she talked about him as though he was the best thing in the world made me despise him. And I started to hate her even more. 

She told me about the plans that they had made together after school. He was going to pick her up and they were going to eat dinner. As she told me all this I felt as though I was going to throw up. My stomach got tight, and I started to feel lightheaded. Though, despite how I was feeling, I kept a smile on my face and wished her luck with her date. After school that day, I followed her home. 

“It’s not stalking.” I told myself. “If I’m going to be with her in the future, I might as well know where she lives.” I thought to comfort myself. I sat a couple of yards away from her house and watched, and waited. I finally saw a black car pull up and saw a man in the car. He had short curly hair, and I watched as his mouth contorted into a smile. I felt sick as I watched her walk towards him. As she got into his car, she turned to him; and I watched as she kissed him. And that broke me.

I heard a terrible ringing in my ears as my stomach turned to knots, and I drove away as fast as I could. I could feel my heart beat faster and faster as I raced down the street. My breathing picked up, and I felt myself hyperventilating. Finally, I felt tears slide down my face. Heavy tears, tears I hadn’t cried in a long time, and finally it was all coming out. I stopped the car right before I crashed into a tree and just stayed there, crying into my hands as I felt the love of my life leaving me. But this wasn’t over, I told myself. I knew there had to be some way I could get her back. Maybe if I told her how I felt, or waited. I came to a decision right there by the tree that very well could have killed me if I had crashed into it, and I decided that I would wait. I couldn’t risk the embarrassment of her hating me forever if I told her how I felt, so the next day she told me about her date. I smiled and congratulated her, all the while thinking of how much I hated her for going out with him. When she was done yacking about him I quickly changed the subject and we went on with our day. 

After school I followed her home, just to make sure she got home safely. I stayed a few yards away like I had done before and watched. I made note of when she went outside to check the mail, when she went to her soccer practice, when she got home from her soccer practice, when her parents came home from work, and when all the lights went out. Right before I was about to leave I watched as the same black car pulled up, and she came running out of her house. 

“What is she doing?” I asked myself. She never told me she would be going out again tonight. When they pulled away, I followed them. I followed a few yards away and tried to make it look like I wasn’t following them, and finally they pulled up to a house. It was a big house with three stories I presumed. All the lights were off; however, there were party lights on, with people going in and out of the house as well as people hanging out in the yard. She was partying, I concluded. I watched as they held hands all the way to the door until they went into the house. I got out of the car and followed them. I saw them talking to a few people, and then she broke off to go to the bathroom. I followed her. Before she could close the door, I forced myself in and closed the door behind me.

“What are you doing here?” I questioned her. 

“What do you mean, what are YOU doing here, Sam?” she questioned back. 

“You never told me you were coming here, did you sneak out just to come and party with Anthony?” 

“Did you follow me here?” she shot back. 

I didn’t answer her at first. 

“What is WRONG with you?” he screamed at me. 

“I was just looking out for you. You shouldn’t be here. Let's go,” I grabbed her arm and she screamed at me to let her go, but I didn't. When we left the bathroom, it looked as though everyone had gone into the basement. There was loud music blasting from downstairs. I took her to my car and put her in. I quickly got in and locked the door before she could get out. 

“Are you serious, Sam? You’re not my boyfriend. Anthony is. I can go out with whoever I want. After she said that, I lost it. The anger that was boiling inside me erupted as I started driving fast down the roads, turning frantically and weaving through the streets. She was screaming at me to stop the car, but I didn't listen. I kept driving until I saw a wooded area. I drove straight for it. The entire time Erica was screaming. I screamed as we hit the tree at full speed. Then I passed out. 

When I woke up, I learned that I had broken both of my legs and had several fractured ribs and a ruptured lung. But I lived. Erica didn’t. I went to trial despite my injuries. I was sentenced to first degree murder and life in prison. I watched in court as Erica’s parents wept at their loss. Anthony looked torn. Only then did I realize what I had done and who I had taken away. I’m sorry Erica.