October

We've spent a lot of time talking about RESPECT since school began. Respect for others, respect for ourselves, respect for our school, and how showing respect can help us become a better learner.

Across the district, school counselors will be delivering classroom lessons regarding bullying prevention. We'll be educating all of our students on how to recognize bullying, how to report it, as well as, how to refuse it in a respectful and productive way. If you'd like to work with your child and expand their learning beyond the classroom, take a look at the curriculum area of this website and print out a home link worksheet!

As adults, with the concept of respect and bullying in mind, it helps to understand the difference between normal conflict and bullying. In addition, understanding the legal definition of bullying is very important. "Bullying" is "more than mean." It's best to describe what's happening and avoid labeling something as bullying without all the information. There is an informative HIB PowerPoint located in the Counseling Chatter section of this web-site that details the law regarding bullying in schools. Educating ourselves is important!

If conflict is present, the below information may additionally be helpful when talking to your children. Many times, bullying can be confused with conflict.

let's RE-FRAME THE CONCEPT OF CONFLICT...

Is conflict good or bad? Often times we’ll ask our elementary school students this question and almost 100% of the time the answer is, it’s “bad”. In reality, conflict is a normal part of life for both children and adults and does not have to be a negative experience. Each of us experiences, processes and perceives the world through our own unique set of eyes; therefore, disagreements, clashes of needs or wants and differing opinions are inevitable. Conflict is not, in and of itself, inherently “bad” but rather neutral. We know that conflict can be uncomfortable and difficult. However, in the end, conflict can be measured by how it is handled, our responses and behaviors when conflicts arise.

So if conflict is inevitable and a normal part of life, how do we change our mindset and the mindset of our children surrounding everyday conflict? It starts with our perception! Remember, conflict does not have to be a negative experience. When conflict is perceived as an opportunity for growth, empathy, awareness, insight, understanding, and compromise (where appropriate) it can lead to strengthened relationships and positive outcomes. The more skilled our children become at handling and navigating conflicts, the more prepared they will be for all of life’s challenges in the future.

What does this mean for our elementary school students? First, we have to break things down for them and normalize conflict. It’s OK when two children want the same toy, want to play different games, don’t like or enjoy the same things, etc… it is going to happen. The focus should be to provide them with the skills to “work things out and being a problem solver” when those times arise. Learning to stop and breath, share feelings in a kind and respectful way, listen to each other and come up with solutions together are critical to the process of successfully working through conflict and create a more peaceful environment at school and home.