Farmer Deals with Unruly Animals  

By: Raymond Meng

Homer resident Old Macdonald, 58, was reported sprinting across town chasing a flock of clucking chickens.

Macdonald’s adventure was captured on security camera footage, depicting a slightly senile man desperately trying to capture his chickens, who seemed to have escaped his farm through a hole in their enclosure.

Donald Biden, a local resident, said: “It really was quite the sight!”

After sending the footage to local authorities, the security guard, Mr. Hatch, noted, “Old Macdonald had a farm.”

According to PETA, “Old Macdonald will no longer have a farm.”