Wesley Center for Spirituality, Service, and Social Justice

What is the Respectful Conversations Project at Hamline University?

“This process was wonderful and hope-filled.” –previous participant

Respectful Conversations is a project of the Minnesota Council of Churches (MCC). MCC Respectful Conversations Teams work with organizations to determine topics and to train table facilitators from the home organization to help generate structured, facilitated conversations designed not to change minds, but soften hearts.

Since 2012, more than 8,000 Minnesotans have participated in over 300 Respectful Conversations on a variety of divisive topics, including:

The amendment defining marriage
Community policing
"Race" relations
Being in community together after the divisive election
Local impact of the conflict between Israelis and Palestinians
Guns in Minnesota
Differences between urban and rural politicians' concerns
Interfaith conversations about drones and violence

Our results speak for themselves: On average, 70% of participants report:

- "I have a stronger sense of empathy for those whose viewpoint is different from my own."

Over 85% agree that:

- As a result of this conversation I have stronger relationships with people in my community.

Over 95% agree that:

They felt listened to
We succeeded in providing a conversation different than a polarizing debate
The process would be useful in other settings.

These conversations also pay off in lasting dividends. Months after their conversation experiences, people report:

Greater awareness of their own listening attitudes,
More curiosity about those they would previously have considered opponents
Transformed family relationships.

Evidence of Lasting Change
We asked people months after their Respectful Conversation experience whether they had observed any lasting impact on their own behavior. Here's what they shared:

"Because of this experience, I am more aware of my own attitude when listening to others of different opinions."
"I have recalled the value of great - really open questions: getting rid of 'don't you think' statements; trying to eliminate my explanations before expressing my question."
"I have tried to carefully listen to opposing viewpoints in some conversations since then, to listen for the experiences, and often fears, that feed into some viewpoints."
"The fact that we are having open conversations with each other is a triumph."
"I became more aware of the importance of letting a speaker complete his/her comments before interjecting a comment or question."
"In the weeks following the event I found myself using better listening skills."

Cultivating Empathy Amid Divisions and International Media Attention

Hamline Holds Its First Respectful Conversation in November, 2023

In 2022, Hamline University experienced a crisis around a classroom incident that put international attention on Hamline University and brought to light tensions within our community around issues of religious sensitivity, academic freedom, and who belongs. This made it hard for us to feel that we are all part of one community together.

In response to this Chaplain Kelly Figueroa-Ray partnered with the Respectful Conversations, a project of the Minnesota Council of Churches, directed by Rev. Jerad Morey.

Two lead facilitators, Joan Haan and Johanna Osman (bios below), met with stakeholders all across Hamline's community for over eight months. Through that work a Respectful Conversations Design Team made up of staff, students, faculty, administration, and alumni met twice in-person to develop a topic and timeframe of the event.

The topic that emerged was "Co-Creating Community at Hamline: What would it take for you to feel like we are all in this together?"

The 2023 Design Team members included:

Alexis Borgesen ('22), alumni, former AmeriCorps VISTA director of Food Resource Center in the Wesley Center (2022-2023) and the Wesley Center Alumni Annual Fund Board member
Ryan LeCount, faculty, Associate Professor and Department Chair of Social Justice and Social Change
Irina Makarevitch, administrator, Associate Provost for Accreditation and Compliance and Biology faculty
Fatuma Mohamed ('24), student, leader in Multi-Faith Alliance/Muslim Student Association (MSA) and the Wesley Center
Hussein Rajput, staff, Director of Counseling Services
Zach Reinsma ('26), student, Multi-Faith Alliance Scholar/leader in Christian Campus Ministry (CCM) and a student athlete
Jason Sole, faculty, Community Fellow Criminology and Criminal Justice
Host: University Chaplain Kelly Figueroa-Ray
Lead Facilitators: Joan Haan and Johanna Osman

2023 Table Facilitators and Participants included:

Students, undergrad and grad
Faculty
Staff
Administrators
Alumni

This first Respectful Conversations event at Hamline was hosted on November 13th, 2023.

The report of the event is now available to look over with an overview of the event, evaluation, and next steps. Here is a brief summary of the results:

69% STRONGLY AGREED that as a result of the conversation, they had stronger relationships.
This is 35% higher than post-pandemic averages
90% AGREED they have more empathy for people they disagreed with. 52% STRONGLY agreed.
This is 18% higher than post-pandemic STRONGLY AGREE average
85% are more confident they can have hard conversations in the future.
This is 12% lower than post-pandemic averages, but the STRONGLY AGREES (38%) are only 3 points lower. This is a tension to explore.

One evaluator's comment reflected the event's spirit: "It was absolutely amazing. I heard different views I really didn't think of until I joined the table. The conversation meant a lot because I left with new knowledge."

Full November 2023 HU Respectful Conversation Event Report by MCC

2023 Co-Creating Community at Hamline Conversation Event Word Clouds

Word clouds, graphics that analyze a lot of text and present the most common words in larger fonts, can help interpret the array of responses. Bypassing the first question about referrals, what follows are clouds related to the other qualitative questions.

"What was the highlight of the Conversation?"

"What was a surprising thing you learned about others?"

"What did you learn about yourself and your own beliefs?"

"What are you taking from this conversation?"

A Student's Thoughts on the 2023 Respectful Conversation on Co-Creating Community at Hamline

Written By Jessalin Dock-Barnes '25
Assistant to Civic Engagement Initiatives & Multi-Faith Scholar

The Respectful conversation: co-creating community at Hamline was just that, a respectful conversation. This space allowed us to practice mindfulness when listening and responding to others. Even though, at times, it felt so structured that there wasn't enough time to hear more of what people had to say and dig into deeper conversation. During this conversation, it was listening and responding to true, thought-provoking words. It opened many eyes to the multiple layers of issues between students, staff, administrators, and faculty. Being able to hear how others felt in a space where initially we wouldn't really hear each other's thoughts, concerns, and hopes in the way that was taught as we live in a room of division. The biggest takeaway from respectful conversations is that we create empathy amongst each other with the baseline understanding that we all want to fight for what's right and live in community with one another. As well as making more of an effort to bring in everybody, including the people we would not have expected to see in that room that night, to have the challenging but much-needed respectful conversation and co-create community at Hamline.

The Second Respectful Conversations Event at Hamline

The 2024 U.S. General Election

In the News: Read the Nov 1, 2024 Star Tribune Article "Can Americans discuss political disagreements respectfully?" that features the Respectful Conversations program.

The second conversation was hosted on November 12th, 2024, on the topic of "The 2024 Election." The conversations we had been having about elections felt like pick-a-side and fight-it-out discussions. With all the news about the 2024 campaign we had so many emotions – and so much to respond to – that it’s hard to know where to begin. When we did talk about the election we often left feeling worse about the people we disagree with, and sometimes worse about ourselves. This facilitated, structured conversation was sponsored by the University Chaplain and President Kathleen Murray, with the hope not to change minds, but soften hearts on the topic of the election.

Meet our MCC Lead Facilitators:

Interested in learning more about Respectful Conversation Program at Hamline?

Check back on this page for opportunities to learn about the Respectful Conversations Program at Hamline University this semester.
Contact Chaplain Kelly at chaplain@hamline.edu

Johanna Osman, 2023 Conversation

A native of Michigan, Johanna comes from a family engaged in social service and development. With degrees in Conflict Resolution and Nonprofit Management, Johanna is active in building healthy relationships among and within communities. She is the executive director of Sakan Community Resource, a nonprofit organization in Minnesota. Sakan’s mission is to make it possible for all people to have stable homes and financial tools that align with their faith and values.

Joan Haan, 2023 and 2024 Conversations

Joan Haan, MA CPCC PCC CTNC is an International Coach Federation, ICF, Professional Coach and was the recipient of ICF Minnesota’s 2020 Elaine C. Gaston Award for Distinguished Service. Joan is a Lead Facilitator for Minnesota Council of Churches’ Respectful Conversations Project. As Lead Facilitator Joan has led conversations regarding the Marriage Amendment, guns, race and other topics in congregations, nonprofits, schools and universities. Joan serves on the DEIJB (Diversity, Equity, Inclusion, Justice, Belonging) Team of ICF Minnesota, and as a leader with ISAIAH, community organizing in Minnesota for “Multiracial Democracy and a Caring Economy”.