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Breathing Techniques: Helping Children Activate Calm

One of the most important skills we teach at Lake Forest Elementary is how to calm our bodies and brains when we experience strong emotions. Through Conscious Discipline, students learn that when they are upset, frustrated, worried, or overwhelmed, taking intentional breaths can help them regain control and prepare their brains for learning and problem-solving.

Breathing exercises help slow the body's stress response, lower anxiety, improve focus, and increase self-regulation. Rather than telling children to "calm down," we teach them specific strategies they can use independently throughout the day.

At the beginning of each school year, all students are introduced to Conscious Discipline's four foundational breathing strategies:

⭐ S.T.A.R. Breathing (Smile, Take a Deep Breath, and Relax)

S.T.A.R. Breathing is the cornerstone of Conscious Discipline. Students learn to stop, smile, take a deep breath, and relax their bodies. This simple strategy helps children shift from reacting emotionally to responding thoughtfully.

💧 Drain Breathing

When emotions feel overwhelming, students imagine they are draining away their stress, frustration, or anger. As they breathe deeply, they visualize negative feelings flowing out of their bodies like water going down a drain.

🎈 Balloon Breathing

Students place their hands on their bellies and imagine they are inflating a balloon. As they breathe in, the balloon expands. As they breathe out, the balloon slowly deflates. This strategy encourages slow, deep breaths that help calm the nervous system.

🥨 Pretzel Breathing

Students cross their arms and legs into a "pretzel" position while taking slow, deep breaths. This technique helps children feel grounded, organized, and focused, especially when emotions are running high.

Wish Well

One of the most meaningful practices in Conscious Discipline is Wish Well. At Lake Forest Elementary, students learn that when they are upset with someone, worried about someone, or having difficulty getting along with someone, they can choose to "wish them well."

Wish Well is a simple mindfulness strategy that helps children shift their focus from anger, frustration, or hurt feelings to compassion and connection. During this practice, students quietly think of a person and wish them safety, happiness, health, and success.

By practicing Wish Well, students learn to:

Develop empathy and compassion
Manage strong emotions
Strengthen positive relationships
Reduce feelings of anger and frustration
Create a more caring and connected school community

Students often begin by wishing themselves well, then extend those wishes to friends, family members, teachers, and even individuals with whom they may be experiencing conflict.

At Lake Forest, Wish Well reminds us that every person deserves kindness, care, and encouragement. It is one small practice that helps us live out our LEO motto: Lift Each Other.

Safe Place

What is it?
A designated area where students can calm their bodies and emotions before returning to learning.

What it is NOT:

A punishment area
Time-out
A place students are sent for misbehavior

What it IS:

A self-regulation tool
A place to practice calming strategies
A learning and practice center

Understanding the Five Steps of Self-Regulation

Step 1: I Am

When a child becomes upset, they enter a survival state where emotions take over and learning stops. The first step is recognizing that the child is overwhelmed and needs support. Students may use the Safe Place or seek help from a trusted adult.

Step 2: I Calm

Before children can think clearly, they must calm their bodies. Through breathing techniques, movement, positive self-talk, and other calming strategies, students learn how to reduce stress and regain a sense of safety and control.

Step 3: I Feel

Once calm, students are encouraged to identify and name their emotions. By learning to recognize feelings such as frustration, sadness, disappointment, worry, or anger, children develop emotional awareness and build the vocabulary needed to express themselves appropriately.

Step 4: I Choose

After identifying their feelings, students learn to choose helpful strategies and positive actions. They may seek support from a friend or teacher, use calming tools, practice kindness, or select another strategy that helps them move forward successfully.

Step 5: I Solve

When students are calm and ready to think clearly, they can solve the problem that caused the upset. They learn to communicate respectfully, take responsibility for their actions, repair relationships when needed, and work toward solutions that help everyone feel safe and respected.

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