Three practices to raising adaptive and resilient children through growth mindset parenting

Have a growth mindset yourself - We all have moments when we have a fixed mindset and when we have a growth mindset. We have days where small setbacks will knock us down and we are tempted to give up when we know we are capable of more. It is important that we acknowledge those moments and help our children recognize those moments, too. When your child is having a fixed mindset moment, help them be aware by helping them name how they feel. Once your child has been calmed, explore the strategies they have tried and whether or not they were effective and discuss other new strategies they could try. It may sound odd, but we need to be more aware of our fixed mindset in order to develop a more persistent growth mindset. In other words, recognizing a fixed mindset is a critical part of shifting toward a growth mindset. It is important that as parents, we remain supportive and consistent over time.

Talent praise versus effort praise - When we praise our children about how smart or talented they are, we can be unconsciously sending them a message that they are talented in some areas, but not in others. This can make them want to focus and demonstrate their talent by doing things they do well and avoiding those that challenge them. We can instead praise our children on the effort and hard work that goes into their learning and success. For example:

Talent Praise Effort Praise

Well done! You’re really smart! Well done, I noticed how much you studied.

Wow, you got an A! What did you find helped you to do so well?

You nailed it - you’re a natural. Great, what did you find the most difficult to learn?

Responding to failure and setbacks - Research shows how we respond as parents when our children experience failure and setbacks is one of the most important factors in how our children develop a fixed mindset response. In downplaying (It’s okay, you can’t be good at everything) or overreacting to a setback (How did you make such a simple mistake? What were you thinking?) sends a message to our children that they don’t have the natural ability to succeed. Research states that a better response would be to focus on the learning and growth that comes from failures and setbacks (What do you think you need to work on to get better?). This response sends the message that mistakes do not define their ability and are not permanent. Throughout life, our children will experience several challenges and setbacks. This is an important part of life because challenges and setbacks are a necessary part of the growth process.

Originally, it was a past time reserved for royalty and the wealthy. In the present, it has evolved into a festival open to the whole world with participants from Japan, Italy, the United Kingdom, Canada, China, United States, France, Brazil, etc. People from all over the world participate in the festivities, where the kites linked with the celebration represents the god's spirits waking from their winter slumber. There are a variety of kites, from lightweight colorful paper with bamboo frames which are the traditional to others featuring celebrities or social themes. A "kite fighting" game takes places as part of the festival, kite fliers try to cut another's strings and knock down their kites. The lines of these kites are most of the time coated with mixture of rice and crushed glass. Acrobats perform during the day and at night illuminated kites, known as "tukkals" fill the skies along with fireworks. It is a tradition to offer sweets made of sesame seeds and jaggery to close ones during the festival and a common saying in Marathi language that means "have these Til-Gul sweets and speak sweet words." This inclusive Indian celebration also takes place in Hindu temples in the United States.