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Reflecting on Mortality
Reflecting on Mortality
by Michelle Arnold
Humans weren’t made to last –
Our spines weighed down by the weight of our hands
Reaching out for sustenance.
Holding on tightly until, loving, loved, losing, and lost,
Gnarled fingers lose their strength.
Humans weren’t made to last –
Hearts and viscera perform on a narrow tightrope,
An endless balancing act before they fall;
We too fail and fall and are failed,
And yet we count our victories on the way down.
Life wasn’t made to last –
Endless helical copies, each so delicately strung
Subsequent generations become unrecognizable –
Incomprehensible and ever changing
In an effort to stave off the inevitable.
Life wasn’t made to last –
This world too shall burn out, swallowed
In the dying cry of a star.
In the meantime, our sparks burst into bright
Dancing flames until we too are ash and stardust.
Studying medicine tends to highlight the tenuousness of human existence. Our bodies seem like fragile machines that can fail endlessly, especially when one’s studies highlight the myriad of diseases that can kill us. And yet, life continues on (for now) and is perhaps more beautiful for its improbability.
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MICHELLE ARNOLD is a third year medical student at the University of Arizona College of Medicine-Phoenix. She obtained her undergraduate degrees from Arizona State University in Biochemistry and Spanish and a Master’s from the same university in Biomedical and Health Ethics. She plans to pursue a career in Obstetrics and Gynecology.
My First Stroke Patient
My First Stroke Patient
by Dara Farhadi
“COVID-19, alone, intubated.
Young Black Female,
BLM protests outside.
Significant anemia. Blood ordered post-procedure.
I check on her. Sedation wearing off.
I explain.
She panics.
“I never want blood!” she writes.
“Why?”
“Religious—Spiritual”
I panic.
RN, PRBC bag in hand.
“No blood,” I say.
I alert MD.
On rounds—
“Thank you, Dara,” she writes.”
Twenty Two Units
Twenty Two Units
by Michelle Arnold
The team performs their intricate dance –
Memorized steps adapted to evolving would-be crises –
As they do damage control on a midnight GSW,
Intestines, kidneys, a still bleeding IVC all receiving their ministrations.
One surgeon astutely observes, “Someone wanted him dead.”
I’m not sure if the taste of blood in the air
Is real or imagined.
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MICHELLE ARNOLD is a third year medical student at the University of Arizona College of Medicine-Phoenix. She obtained her undergraduate degrees from Arizona State University in Biochemistry and Spanish and a Master’s from the same university in Biomedical and Health Ethics. She plans to pursue a career in Obstetrics and Gynecology.
Rebirth
Rebirth
by Dr. Susan Kaib
Cancer
Lucky you came
To bring meaning each day,
Yield to its power, forfeit dreams,
Alive!
DR. KAIB is a Career and Professional Advisor and chapter advisor for the Gold Humanism Honor Society at the University of Arizona, College of Medicine- Phoenix. She is a fellow of the American Board of Family Medicine. After graduating from Arizona State University with a Bachelor of Science degree in Chemistry, she worked as a neonatal biochemist for three years. She earned her medical degree from the University of Arizona, Tucson and completed her residency at Phoenix Baptist Hospital. Prior to joining the College of Medicine-Phoenix, she was in private practice in Phoenix.
Flying Across the COVID19 Pandemic
Flying Across the COVID19 Pandemic
by Julie Tran
Flying 2,271 miles across the pandemic
From Arizona to Maryland
A partially-crowded and noisy flight
My purpose?
Visiting my father for the very last time
Who now lays still and pleasantly serene
15 scattered passengers on the flight back home
A quiet plane for nostalgic memories
I will always miss and love you, Dad.
Always.
On March 16, 2020, my father passed away in Maryland while I was across the country, in the middle of my Transitions block at UACOM-P. Whether it was from COVID19 or not, I am uncertain. However, during my flight both to and from Maryland, I had time to reflect on the situation. I remember being stunned by the sudden rush of emotions from both this pandemic and my father’s death. This is further amplified by my experience of seeing the stark difference in the partially-filled flight on the way to Maryland and the practically-empty flight one week later on the way back to Arizona. Given the current events, I feel fortunate to have seen him for the last time before his cremation. In the same vein, I am thankful for this reflective opportunity to share my feelings during this disheartening time.
This 55-word story was originally published in the “Stories-in-Medicine” COVID-19 Reflections Collection, available from: www.tinyurl.com/storiesinmedicine
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JULIE TRAN is part of the class of 2022 at UA COM-P
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