To start off my review I just want to look at Finleyās previous Barbie review from issue 1.
In his Barbie movie review he explained that it's one of the best movies heās seen with a great cast, fantastic visuals, interesting story and banging soundtrack. And almost everyone in the world agrees with him and believes that Margot Robbie's Barbie movie is a cinematic masterpieceā¦. Sick yet? I know I amā¦.Ā
The Barbie movie (in my humble opinion) is nothing more than a woke mean-spirited anti-male dumpster fire! (forgive me for sounding like Mr Enter but it has to be said.)Ā
And thankfully Iām not the only one who sees that. I wonāt go into full detail about it, but to make a long story short Barbie lives in Barbie world and leaves because sheās worried about death and while she is looking for her owner in the real world Ken takes over, because men have been treated unfairly in Barbie Land but then Barbie comes back, and restores āorderā.Ā
Ok I get that more female representation is in order and Iām fine with it. Heck! Two of my many favourite cartoons are the Power Puff Girls and Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi. Which indeed shows females as lead characters. But that doesnāt mean you should put others down because they are boys.
I firmly believe that everyone should not be judged for who they are. Boy or girl, old or young, black or white and so on. And that is something the Barbie movie failed to realise. And to think it stole the attention from other movies too. Ruby Gilman and Elemental to name a few.Ā
But one movie dodged the bullet entirely. Iām of course talking about the Mario movie! Now hold your fire Nintendo fans, I actually like this movie. In fact, Iād go as far as to say that this is the biggest and happiest surprise of 2023 period!Ā
Why isĀ it a surprise you ask? Well, letās dive in and find out.Ā
So the company that created this(ACTUAL!) Cinematic Masterpiece is Illumination Entertainment. Yeah! That Illumination! The same company behind the painfully average Minions (2015) and the disastrous Hop (2011). But since Minions Rise Of Gru from last year Illumination is on a bit of a roll, and the Mario movie just backs that evidence.Ā
After the opening logos the movie opens to find ourselves in the Mushroom Kingdom, more specifically the Cool Cool Mountain area where An army of Koopas are trying to get the super star from another army consisting of penguins. The Koopas army is led by Bowser, voiced by Jack Black. (also known as Po from the Kung Fu Panda franchise). And after a battle and the famous do you yield scene the Koopas are victorious and Bowser claims the superstar.Ā
We then cut to a TV advert and a nod to the Super Mario Bros Super Show from the late 80s and early 90s. Here we are introduced to Mario and Luigi voiced by Chris Pratt and Charlie Day now when this movie was announced. I wasnāt sure if Pratt would fit Marios character as was everyone else in the world. But surprise surprise!
He actually does a great job. And unlike other movies, the Mario movie pays close attention to its source material and everything related to characters like Jumpman and Spike (from Wrecking Crew) are in the movie.Ā
Even the Italian accents make a cameo in the TV ad. After an intimidating chat with Spike, Mario and Luigi get a call from a rich woman, saying thereās a drip in her faucet, so they head on over. Since the van wonāt start, they instead go by foot, doing Mario video game inspired Parkour.
My only gripe is No Sleep Till Brooklyn playing in the background. Itās not bad - just kinda out of nowhere -Ā but I guess it works in the movie's favour as it fits really nicely with this scene.Ā
When they arrive they get to work on the toilet or at least they would if it wasnāt for a bad tempered dog named Francis who then proceeds to give them a bad time much to their relief they come out on top but make a bit of a mess of their job.(Geez, all that over a bone?)Ā Ā
Later they join their family for a meal together at home, this is where we learn that they are Italian Americans. (and the fact Mario doesnāt like mushrooms) He asks his Dad if he's proud of him. His Dad replied saying that he can't pursue some crazy dream rather than have a well paid job. Disappointed he heads over to his room where he can be seen playing Kid Icarus (another Nintendo reference) he then turns on the news to find out thereās a huge flood in Brooklyn.Ā
And after a brief cameo from Mayor Pauline he grabs his brother and heads off to the site of the flood. They go in through the sewer system via a manhole and after a failed attempt at fixing the pressure pipe, they crash into a wall and find themselves in an eerie part of the sewer that hasnāt been used in years.Ā
They get side tracked by going inside a massive sewage pipe that separates and transports the two brothers to the one and only Mushroom Kingdom. Mario wakes up dazed and confused to find himself surrounded by giant mushrooms. He tries to touch one but is stopped by someone saying ādo not touch that mushroom or you die!āĀ
That āsomeoneā just so happens to be Toad voiced by Keegan Michael key, Mario tells Toad that heās cooking for his brother Luigi who had been sent to a foggy lava filled wasteland, Toad warns him of the danger Luigi is in, heās been sent to the Dark Lands a world controlled by Bower.Ā
Wow, that's a long review! But wait, there's more! Read the rest below!Ā