a poem by Siena Edwards
My heart sank when I looked at the lesson plan.
Suddenly, I felt isolated in a classroom full of kids.
I felt their stares. All eyes locked on me from every
corner of the room. They act as if I just escaped
with Harriet from the plantations.
I’m tired of getting the same lecture. Why can’t they
just let me drive? “Compliance is key.” “Don’t make them
feel threatened.” “Just do what they say and you’ll come
home safe to me.” I’m just going to the store.
Why do I fear the people that I should rely on to protect me?
Why would they hurt me if I’ve done nothing wrong?
I know I heard her say it. Doesn’t she know where
that word comes from? How it’s been used against people
like me for generations? I should have said something
to her. Why didn’t I say something to her?
I do not understand. Why couldn’t I be Elsa for the play?
I had my costume ready and I stayed up all night
memorizing the lyrics. “You don’t look like her,” they said
to me. I did not know it mattered.
Why was I cursed with this skin? Why does it feel like
I have a target on my back? Why does being black
come with this unbearable weight? I feel as if I am suffocating.
Like I am crying out for help but no one moves a muscle.
I am exhausted. Why do I work so hard just to get halfway there?
All they see is my skin. I thought it was beautiful.