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Created by Samrith Loeung
Introduction
Introduction
"Hunt Family Portrait"
A typical family portrait from the 1900s.
The idea of sibling relationships and their effects are a more modern social topic compared to most other studied fields in sociology, which is quite intriguing as most people would argue that early childhood is one of the most pivotal points of development for people, especially with the social aspect between them and their families- including dynamics, hierarchies, and roles. Due to the changing dynamics of families and social expectations throughout history, such as gender stereotypes and family structure, sibling relationships also naturally change as a result. These effects are also caused by a plethora of other causes, including, but not limited to, stage of life, age difference between siblings, available parental figures, competitiveness, and social capital. Some people may argue that sibling relationships are not as important to a person's social and personal development compared to friendships or parent-child relationships. However, siblingship is a unique type of relationship with many special traits that are not found in other types of relationships. In this multimedia essay, I will be breaking down multiple causes and their effects that helped shape what became the modern relationships between siblings alongside how it continuously changes throughout their lives.
Siblings and Public Appearance
Many people believe that young children's perspectives of the greater world, especially socially and politically, are based on the views of their parental figures as well as their siblings. This can be perceived statistically within the study done in "And What About Siblings? A Longitudinal Analysis of Sibling Effects on Youth’s Intergroup Attitudes", where it is observed in multiple different societies that children are more likely to be politically involved if their families are involved with an even greater chance for their alliances to be in agreement with their family members. (1) In this case, parents act as a typical role model, where their children adopt their perspectives because they trust their parents to be objectively correct and want to feel closer to them by sharing the same beliefs. This role model ideology also applies to the relationship between younger and older siblings. Younger siblings tend to look up to their older siblings and try to follow in their footsteps, even to the point of having the same social beliefs on past politically controversial topics like gender roles in society in the 1900s. Socially, the sentiment is shared in which older siblings shape their younger siblings' behaviors and points of interests. (2) Despite that, this research also comes to the conclusion that, much like in the family hierarchy of influence, sibling relationships, albeit very important, are still second-hand when it comes to shaping children's perspectives of the world compared to parent-children relationships.
A family with differing political viewpoints and affecting their children.
A picture of siblings growing up together illustrated by Emma Darvick.
Siblings and Parental Bias
Sibling relations tend to fluctuate throughout the multiple stages in their lives. (3) The feeling of familial loneliness and yearning was greatest right before and right after leaving the family household, especially between sister siblinghood, which lines up with the social gender standard of women being more expressive emotionally compared to their male counterparts. (4) Family and sibling
relationships even transcended that of conflicting social beliefs and standings. As siblings continue to grow up together and, then eventually, physically apart, their relationships usually get better as they spend more time apart, mainly seen as an effect of losing a family member that they could truly feel comfortable with in a different way than the type of security their parents could provide.
Based on the social motivation theories seen in "Understanding the Value of Siblings in Old Age: "A Proposed Model"" by Purdue University's Victoria H. Bedford, past motivations for relationships were based on "incentive value", which basically consisted of how much both parties could benefit from partaking in said social relationship, physically, mentally, socially, or otherwise- as long as it was beneficial in some way. The other two types of relationships are "intrinsic" relationships, which are psychological relationships tying together attraction and physical proximity, and "negative incentive value", a negative source of persuasion- competitiveness, combat, or the likewise. (5) This relates back to sibling relationships because they are one of the few relationships people will make in their entire lives that transcends a lot more conflict compared to other relationships, allowing it to be a healthy balance between negativity and positivity.
As siblings grow older and their relationship develops, sisters become more self-confident after life-altering events like child-bearing while brothers become more mellowed out and attuned to their emotional side once they settle down after being held socially accountable. In a sense, both parties understand what the other sibling that to go throughout their entire childhood, gaining a certain mutual respect for each other, which further evolves their interpersonal relationship into a more positive direction and with less negativity. (6)
A picture of the son being pushed towards education while the daughter is given a doll instead of encouraged.
Illustrated by Yevgenia Nayberg.
Parental differential treatment, also known as PDT, is tackled within the article "Mothers', fathers', and siblings' perceptions of parents' differential treatment of siblings: Links with family relationship qualities". PDT refers to the way in which parents treat their children differently based on birth order, gender, and any other social demographics. One of the more common results of PDT is poorer relationships with siblings as it usually causes higher risks in youth behaviors and a resentment for the less favorable siblings as well as the parents that are catalyzing the biases according to the social comparison theory. (7) The theory suggests that the favored sibling will have higher self-esteem and physical as well as mental well-being whereas the less favored siblings will more likely have problems with self-acceptance, confidence, and individual worth after being
sidelined for most of their life by their parents who are supposed to give them the support. Tangible examples include doing better academically and being involved in less risky behavior when being the favorite sibling while the neglected siblings tend to harbor resentment for the other parties, which causes tension and distance in their family relationships, not just in their sibling relationship. On the other hand, in an attempt to be more like the favored sibling, children may copy the same actions exhibited to them by their siblings even if it goes against their morals or belief in what is acceptable or unacceptable.
PDT also not only changes the dynamics and sibling relationships within families, but also affects the parent-child relationships. For most cases, children see parental differential treatment through the lens of social comparison, a fancy way of saying they compare themselves to others around them and form a sense of self-value based on what is perceived. (9) Since parents treat their children differently based on a multitude of factors, which may or may not include personal biases on a case by case basis, their children see this difference and experience negative or positive emotions as a result. Such conceived emotions include anger, resentment, and self-loathing that then lead to these feelings manifesting in the form of depression, delinquency, and strained emotional relationships with family members, especially against their siblings and, in some cases, parents.
Siblings and Responses to Bullying/Early Life
The study of the social relationship known as "bullying" between peers was historically limited to Scandinavia, circulating around the 1990s. This research became more widespread in the USA after school shootings in 1999 by students. The definition of bullying is described in the article "Teen responses when a younger school-age sibling has been bullied" as "a child is being bullied or victimized when he or she is exposed, repeatedly and over time, to negative actions on the part of one or more other students," which primarily includes all types of abuse- physical, verbal, social, etc. (9) Despite the typical rivalries that are existent in a multitude of sibling relationships, in terms of bullying, there isn't an underlying familial connection that brings both parties together as they outgrow their tendencies to act bitter towards each other, which is the defining difference between the two types of relationships. When siblings find out their sibling is being bullied, there are multiple reactions that may happen, but they are all rooted in one common goal- protecting them, either through acts such as offering advice, assistance, or otherwise. Older siblings provide a lot of social stability when it comes to healthy relationships when younger siblings start feeling social inadequacy and having thoughts correlating to low self-esteem.
However, siblings may also be influences for their bullied sibling in other, more negative ways well. Some siblings may develop tendencies towards physicality or other forms of abuse, such as vocal, due to how they handle their disagreements with their sibling and believe it to be the right way to handle bullies, which then, in turn, may lead them to bullying others, resulting in the saying "hurt people hurt people."
"Don't Mess With Her!"
Four brothers protecting their baby sister.
This figure shows the General Ability difference between first-born and second-born based on age difference and year groups.
Siblings and IQ
Siblings and IQ
The Flynn effect is a phenomenon that studies the increase in overall IQ of people in the 20th century and onwards. This theory is also supported by the idea that people have had a better environment, education, marriage practices (inbreeding between families that led to depressed cognitive functions in the brain), and a plethora of other underlying causations as society evolved to foster a healthier community for children to grow. In the case of the Flynn effect on sibling relationships, a study done on three focus groups of brothers between the 1950s to 1980s- one where there was a positive outcome, a negative outcome, and no trace of the Flynn effect. In the positive outcome, those brothers had similar intelligence levels despite age differences. In the negative outcome, the brothers' age difference correlates with a difference in IQ level. Whereas in the no Flynn effect group, there was no correlation between age and IQ. (10) This study, although only focusing on brotherhood, shows how sibling relationships do affect the mental progression of children, both either positive or negative. Older siblings are seen as role models and mounts of knowledge from the perspective of younger siblings, which is most likely the reason why younger children tend to copy the actions of their older peers, even if they don't believe it to be right.
This figure is from the article "O brother, where art thou? Investment in siblings for inclusive fitness benefits, not father absence, predicts earlier age at menarche," showing the mean age of menstruation based on family situations.
Siblings and Single Parents
Siblings and Single Parents
The phenomenon of single parent households affects sibling relationships in more ways than one. According to the article "O brother, where art thou? Investment in siblings for inclusive fitness benefits, not father absence, predicts earlier age at menarche," Daniel Smith argues the effects of girls living without a father-like role model versus having siblings, believing that the reason for early menarche was linked more closely to the fact that sisters who develop deep relationships with their siblings will focus more on personal independence and growth compared to having accelerated development for reproduction. (11) Children are less likely to reproduce if their mothers are still taking care of their own offspring, which would lead to a competition for resources if they were to also have their own children. At this point, they would instead foster their relationship with their siblings and parents foremost. In many societies, having siblings actually increases survivability rates for offspring, which strengthens the importance for having strong and healthy sibling relationships beyond just the immediate parties, but for multiple parts of each other's lives. Ultimately, in a setting or situation where a family is broken apart, sibling relationships become of even greater importance to developing children since they need a relationship to find solace, companionship, and relatedness in, especially in times of hardship.
Siblings and Developmental Differences
Siblings and Developmental Differences
Siblings teaching each other chess.
Building further on the notion of parental differential treatment, children's language acquisition and proficiency can also be linked back to sibling relationships. As stated before, since older siblings are seen as role models, many younger siblings tend to learn from them- this also includes the learning of languages, especially in bilingual
households where the parents may not be as proficient in the second language. Instead, they funnel a lot of their resources into teaching their firstborn both languages to give them the best education as well as a sort of personal translator. This leads any younger siblings that come after them to not have as many resources in acquiring new knowledge in fields such as language. (12) In this sense, it sounds like there are only negatives, but there are also some positives for the younger siblings. In the same scenario, since the parents may not understand the second language fluently enough to teach their children, the firstborn sibling is able to act as a teacher to any younger siblings, which is a benefit to all parties involved. This is also an example of the ideas expressed in the article "Do siblings influence one another? Unpacking processes that occur during sibling conflict," where siblings influence each other in both positive and negative ways. Sibling relationships mirror a lot of other interpersonal relationships seen in life- a relationship where one person is the dominant lead and the other is more so a following listener. Though, unlike these real world relationships, sibling relationships are closer to peer relationships in nature due to a proximity of closeness as family and mutual respect for each other. (13) The relationships seen between siblings are a type that does not have the typical power dynamic that older-younger relationships, yet also do not fall under the umbrella term of friendship. It is a type of relationship that transcends both in the sense that it is a combination and hard to recreate organically with other types of relationships, helping each other develop skills through a transfer of knowledge between family members while also being able to respect each other as individuals and their own choices.
Siblings and Change Over Time
Siblings and Change Over Time
It is no mystery that a person's relationship with others changes as time passes and both parties develop independently. One of the prime examples of this change over time for relationships are familial relationships, especially that of siblingship. Siblings will more often than not be involved in each other's lives to varying degrees based on the stage of life they are in and how developed their relationship is. During early developmental stages, siblings may be subjected to jealousy from PDT to each other, have a sense of protectiveness, love, mentorship, or any other feeling in between. However, as they grow up to become more independent and form their own opinions and beliefs of right or wrong, they are bound to get wound up in sibling and familial conflicts that may or may not alienate them from the rest of their family or certain members. This can be seen in the three cases in the article "Resolving middle-age sibling conflict regarding parent care," where there are multiple instances of conflict between middle-aged siblings related to familial concerns for ailing parents and choices of extended family members- spouses and close friends. (14) Despite this, if these types of conflicts are handled positively well, it can lead to a strengthening of the established siblingship and parental bond. Although, there are also situations where problems persist throughout entire lifetimes and siblings or parents and children will never see eye to eye, which is perfectly fine, too, if both parties are willing to burn the bridges. The nature of relationships change throughout time for better or worse, especially the long-term ones like siblings or parental.
Two pictures of siblings having a conflict and then resolving the conflict.
Notes
Eckstein, Katharina and Šerek, Jan and Noack, Peter, "And What About Siblings? A Longitudinal Analysis of Sibling Effects on Youth’s Intergroup Attitudes" Journal of Youth and Adolescence (1989): 384. https://www.proquest.com/docview/1993516063accountid=9676&parentSessionId=4uyMdOWVnY8Lq8Ttb9F2Wx2ef9I1Ad0oWRRiVC9yH9w%3D&pqorigsite=primo
Eckstein, "Longitudinal Analysis of Sibling Effects," 384.
Bedford, Victoria H, "Understanding the Value of Siblings in Old Age: "A Proposed Model"" Purdue University (1989): 35. https://www.proquest.com/docview/1306755354?accountid=9676&parentSessionId=%2Boxj20yo%2BwXpCmpJ5z%2F%2FXAfi32mpx8P3MC0gIYNWopo%3D&pq-origsite=primo&imgSeq=1
Bedford, "Siblings in Old Age," 37.
Bedford, "Siblings in Old Age," 34.
Bedford, "Siblings in Old Age," 44.
Jensen, Alexander C. and McHale, Susan M. "Mothers', fathers', and siblings' perceptions of parents' differential treatment of siblings: Links with family relationship qualities" Journal in Adolescence (2017)
https://www-sciencedirect-com.ezproxy.bu.edu/science/article/pii/S0140197117301276Roland, Emily and Marceau, Kristine, "Individual and Sibling Characteristics: Parental Differential Treatment and Adolescent Externalizing Behaviors" Journal of Youth and Adolescence (2018): 2536. https://www.proquest.com/docview/2067505249accountid=9676&parentSessionId=eGA4mxbJxeMzwHCH3HHcZ2yHGHOv5r%2FVmFSNrEgi%2FKA%3D&pq-origsite=primo
Hoing, Alice Sterling and Zundowski-Sjoblom, Nicole "Teen responses when a younger school-age sibling has been bullied" International Journal of Adolescence and Youth (2021).
https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/02673843.2014.975258Sundet, Jon Martin and Eriksen, Willy and Borren, Ingrid and Tambs, Kristian, "The Flynn effect in sibships: Investigating the role of age differences between siblings'' Intelligence (Norwood) (2010)
https://www-sciencedirect-com.ezproxy.bu.edu/science/article/pii/S0160289609001494\Smith, Daniel, "O brother, where art thou? Investment in siblings for inclusive fitness benefits, not father absence, predicts earlier age at menarche" Biology Letters (2005) (2017)
https://royalsocietypublishing-org.ezproxy.bu.edu/doi/10.1098/rsbl.2017.0464Havron, Naomi and Franck, Ramus and the EDEN Mother-Child Cohort Study Group, "The Effect of Older Siblings on Language Development as a Function of Age Difference and Sex" Sage Journals (2019)
https://journals-sagepub-com.ezproxy.bu.edu/doi/full/10.1177/0956797619861436Borairi, Sahar and Plamondon, Andre and Rodrigues, Michelle and Sokolovic, Nina and Perlman, Michal and Jenkins, Jennifer, "Do siblings influence one another? Unpacking processes that occur during sibling conflict" Child Development (2023)
https://srcd-onlinelibrary-wiley-com.ezproxy.bu.edu/doi/full/10.1111/cdev.13842Gentry, Deborah B, "Resolving middle-age sibling conflict regarding parent care" Conflict Resolution Quarterly (2019): 37-41.
https://heinonline-org.ezproxy.bu.edu/HOL/Page?collection=journals&handle=hein.journals/cfltrq19&id=33&men_tab=srchresults
About the Author
Samrith Loeung grew up in Philadelphia, also known as the City of Brotherly Love, but was born in the prosperous city of Phnom Penh, Cambodia, going from riches to rags. Despite the laid back attitude he tries to exude, Samrith tends to get very passionate about topics that interest him, leading him to have heated debates about many differences of opinions with his peers as well as his friends should the time ever come. However, even though he has a strong will, Samrith has trouble deciding what he wants to do with his life and committing to a long-term plan for the future.
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