The History and Evolution of Flowers
Weddings have been a celebration of love and the joining of individuals for centuries now. As years passed the celebration become more extravagant and more popular, it was celebrated by ancient Hebrews, Romans, and Greeks. Flowers have been incorporated and had significant meaning for centuries. However, as society becomes more progressive the norms and expectations of weddings and women are forever changing. Flowers from the beginning of time have always been gendered, wedding bouquets specifically focus on the expectation that women be fertile and pure. However, today weddings have progressed to not just be for love between a man and a woman but to be a joining of individuals of the same sex, and different races, and ultimately a legal bond between all different types of individuals. Similarly, women are starting to take charge of gender expectations and turn away from the bouquet toss.
Weddings have always incorporated flowers one way or another, whether it’s in a wreath or in a bouquet, weddings always have some form of floral arrangement incorporated. It started with the Romans; they started their incorporation of flowers as a form of decoration. (1) The different types of flowers had different meanings. Flowers at weddings during the Roman times had great meaning, which served the purpose to provide new beginnings and fertility to the newlyweds. Roman wedding traditions served the purpose to provide meaning to the wedding, for instance, the tradition of a June wedding was because it was the month of Juno. This meant that the couple would be blessed with childbirth and marriage if they were to marry within this month. (2). Another famous wedding tradition in Roman times was their dress. Men would wear the Toga Virrilis (3) which was symbolic of men entering their adulthood. Women, on the other hand, would have their hair done in a specific style called seni crines which was an extremely popular hairstyle of the time that consisted of six braids. Women began to incorporate flowers into their dress through a wreath on the top of their heads with a specific veil. The veil was known as the flammeum and held important significance in protecting the bride on her wedding day from any evil spirits. The veils were a deep yellow shade, which portrayed similarities to a flame. (4) The wreath could also be referred to as the corolla, and this was the first documented account of flowers having a part in weddings. The corolla, similarly, had great importance to the bride and the prosperity of the wedding as it provided the bride with fertility. (5) Flowers were significant during the Roman times, they brought superstitions and meaning to weddings, each flower was carefully thought out and had an intended purpose at weddings. From the earliest encounters with flowers at weddings, they have always been gendered. Flowers are seen as feminine and bring meaning to women rather than men. Women have always had expectations to have a nuclear family, their expectations are to marry and then go through childbirth. The purpose and meaning behind flowers at weddings are cementing the ideology in women that they must marry and have kids. The purpose of the Corolla and marrying in the month of June were to bring fertility to the couple. It wasn’t a choice for women it was a clear expectation. (6)
The Middle Ages allowed for more wedding traditions to emerge. For instance, the tradition of men and women placing the wedding ring on their fourth finger was established during the Middle Ages. (7). The incorporation of flowers followed in the footsteps of the Roman times with flowers having the meaning of loyalty, purity, and love. (8) Roses were the flower of choice due to the connotations of love that they held. (9). Evil spirits were heavily feared in the Middle Ages and so the bouquet would incorporate herbs to ward off any evil spirits from the wedding ceremonies. (10) There was immense pressure on women during this time to have a partner. Marriage was a survival strategy for women, it was economically impossible for women to be single. Hence, women had increased pressure from society and family to marry and have a family in order to survive. (11). The bouquet toss is theorized to have started during the Middle Ages as a form of luck for single women who were attending weddings. (12). The ideology that women needed luck and prosperity in finding a husband further intensifies the pressure that was on women that had to be married.
It was in the 19th century that weddings and wedding vendors started to bloom. Coming out of the 18th century newspapers began to advertise businesses that were related to weddings and hence the wedding businesses grew more and more popular. (13) Royal weddings were also having an influence on the trends and traditions at weddings. American wedding culture was largely influenced by Royal Weddings in the United Kingdom. It was Princess Elizabeth who incorporated orange blossoms in her bouquet which led to the popularity of flowers in the bridal bouquet. (14). Victorian royal wedding bouquets were composed of three flowers, orange blossoms, myrtle, and white heather. (15) They held great significance and importance. For instance, orange blossoms had the meaning of purity and innocence. They were a popular choice for bridal bouquets in the 19th century. Furthermore, the myrtle was used in wedding bouquets as it was seen as a symbol of love and marriage. It was theorized to bring happiness and prosperity to the royal couple. Finally, the white heather was considered a symbol of good luck and was famously used by Queen Victoria in her wedding bouquet. (16) The white heather had been thought to have healing properties and was used as a medicinal herb. The significance of these flowers in the Victorian era was monumental, it led to an increase in demand in the public for these flowers in brides' wedding bouquets. The public viewed these flowers as having symbols of love, purity, and good luck which in turn led to an increase in demand for the orange blossom, myrtle, and white heather. (17) The orange blossom also was highly prized for wedding bouquets due to their pungent fragrance, this was seen to be an important aspect for bridal bouquets. The myrtle was another popular flower for the public due to its belief in bringing happiness and prosperity to a couple. This tradition originated in ancient Greece where Myrtle had associations with the goddess of love, Aphrodite. (18)
Moving into the 20th century, rather than the specific flowers involved with wedding bouquets, the colors of the bouquet became increasingly important. The color white was the color to have. According to Cassells Household Guide of 1869 etiquette journal, “bridesmaids’ bouquets are composed of colored flowers” whereas bridal bouquets were “composed exclusively of pure white flowers”. White had connotations of purity and innocence and it was considered an appropriate color for the bridal bouquet. The famous wedding of the 20th century was Princess Diana’s wedding to Prince Charles in 1981, which over 17 million Americans watched (19). In Figure 1, Princess Diana is seen to be holding an extravagant cascading bouquet filled with white flowers throughout. Before the 1970’s bridal bouquets were minimalistic and compact. They were often made up of a single type of flower. The beauty was in the simplicity of the bouquet. Bouquets often had some incorporation of color, from pastels to bold hues. Flowers that were seen in bridal bouquets in the early 20th century were roses, lilies, and orchids. After Princess Diana’s wedding, however, bridal bouquets became more extravagant following in the footsteps of Princess Diana. In the latter half of the 20th century, bridal bouquets became more personalized. Brides started to incorporate non-floral elements such as feathers, beads, and ribbons to create an eclectic and bohemian look.
The 20th century was also the time in which the bouquet toss became a more frequent practice at weddings. The bouquet toss tradition, as we know it today is when the bride throws her bouquet into a group of single women at the wedding reception. The superstition is that whoever catches the bouquet will be the next to get married. The bouquet toss gained publicity and attention in the 20th century due to the rise of mass media. Magazines and films started to be influenced by tradition and incorporate into their shows. The 1975 Rocky Horror Picture Show incorporates Janet catching the bouquet, or in the 1995’s Clueless where the girls have a catfight over the bouquet. The significance of The Rocky Horror Picture Show is that it starts off with Brad and Janet being in what society would deem as a normal couple but in the end come out of it as changed in different ways. Not only was the film industry taking part in the popularization of the bouquet toss, but bridal bouquets such as Brides and Modern Bride featured articles on the bouquet toss, in which they provide tips for brides on how to perfect the bouquet toss.
The 20th century was also a time in which women became more independent through their efforts in entering the workforce. (20) Perhaps, with this, the bouquet toss allowed women to have a sense of empowerment as it was a way to take control of their romantic relationships. The bouquet toss can be viewed in the 20th century as being a way for women to celebrate their independence. The bouquet toss perhaps is also the cause for the changing of the bridal bouquet from being extravagant to a smaller compact bouquet. Florists started to advertise their bouquets with the intention of the bouquet being thrown.
What started out as a tradition to provide luck and prosperity to future brides and single women has now turned into an anxiety-inducing event for single women. The common view that women need a man in order to be happy is ingrained into all women's heads since their childhood. It wasn’t until 2012, that Disney released a movie where the protagonist does not get married to a man in order to be happy. Little girls grow up watching movies that feed the ideology that a woman's worth and happiness are inextricably tied to her marital status. In the article "I'm a Loser, I'm Not Married, Let's Just All Look at Me": Ever-Single Women's Perceptions of Their Social Environment, Elizabeth Sharp explores the issues that single women face in society today. Sharp, points out that the primary issue is the stigma single women receive for not being married. Single women often have a sense of judgment towards them that has an underlying assumption that they have failed or are inadequate in some way. (21) Ultimately, this stigma can lead to feelings of intense loneliness, social isolation, and low self-esteem for women. Sharp includes anecdotes of single women's experiences and how they are constantly under pressure to find a partner. (22) This ultimately includes the bouquet toss. The bouquet toss ultimately places immense pressure on women to conform to traditional gender roles and expectations. The bouquet toss is meant to bring luck to single women in finding their husbands and getting married. Although it may seem innocent, it essentially insinuates that women must marry and that they need luck in order to not be single. It is seen that it is a problem if women do not conform to this expectation.
For single women attending weddings, the bouquet toss can essentially be a particularly anxiety-inducing event. Whether it's causing stress for the women catching the bouquet as they now feel unwanted speculation from other wedding guests about when they will get married or the ones who stand to the side hoping to not draw attention. The bouquet toss has become an extremely outdated tradition that essentially is a way to pinpoint single women and produce unnecessary anxiety for women. The bouquet toss is also extremely gendered in that it insinuates women are the ones who need help to not being single and not men. Bouquets and the tradition had meaning in the past, that further implemented these ideologies.
Today, media are following the conception that the bouquet toss is outdated and that it is normal for women to not be enthusiastic about it. This can be seen in Sex and the City’s episode “The Chicken Dance”, Figure 2, where all four women stand back and watch the bouquet land at their feet. This episode, although humoristic, was a turning point for women. Women may feel pressure to participate in the bouquet toss, due to its popularity, but this proves that it’s a common feeling to not want to participate in the bouquet toss at weddings. Whether it’s because women feel uninterested or don’t want to place pressure on their relationship status, women should not be forced into standing in a circle, bringing attention to themselves, to catch a bouquet in the hopes that they will find a man.
One individual wrote in her blog “I didn’t like the attention of everyone’s eyes focusing on all of us single ladies, wondering who will be the lucky winner. Sometimes nobody even wanted to catch it – I certainly didn’t want to!” (23) It is evident that today there is a general consensus among women that this tradition is unwelcoming and awkward for single women. The time-old tradition is ultimately necessary and just feeds into the gender expectation that women have to be mothers and have a nuclear family. Society is moving past gender expectations and norms and the traditions should follow in these footsteps. Society should not be placing pointless expectations of fertility and marriage on women.
Today several wedding magazines and websites are now proposing alternatives to the wedding bouquet toss. Whether it's having an anniversary dance or passing out the bouquet to all the wedding guests, the bouquet toss is losing its popularity due to its patriarchal and the pressures it brings to women at weddings. (24) Martha Stewart suggested that instead of the bouquet toss brides could perhaps pass out the flowers to wedding guests. (25) Weddings can already be an emotional and difficult time for single women or unmarried women, the bouquet toss ultimately intensifies this pressure and anxiety.
Women are allowed to enter the workforce and have a job. Women do not need to have families and marry a man in order to be happy. Women can achieve happiness in numerous ways, if a woman wants to get married and have children it is acceptable, women who don’t want this should also be accepted in society. The traditions and connotations that are tied with the bouquet and bouquet toss need to be changed. The bouquet toss and the underlying meaning behind specific flowers, throughout history have resulted in an increase in anxiety when it comes to women being single. Throughout the past century, however, there has been a turning point in the expectations. It can be seen throughout the media, whether it's in movies or blog posts, women are changing the norm.
Figure 1: Princess Diana 29 July 1981 at Her Wedding to Prince Charles. Getty Images.
Figure 2: Sex and the City, Episode 7 Season 2 "The Chicken Dance" Seidelman, Susan. 1999. “Sex and the City.” HBO.
Footnotes:
1: Hersch, Karen K. 2010. The Roman Wedding : Ritual and Meaning in Antiquity. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.
2: Hersch, Karen K. 2010. The Roman Wedding : Ritual and Meaning in Antiquity. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.
3: HERSCH, KAREN KLAIBER. 2013. “INTRODUCTION to the ROMAN WEDDING: TWO CASE STUDIES.” Classical Journal 109 (2): 223–32. https://doi.org/10.1353/tcj.2013.0004.
4: HERSCH, KAREN KLAIBER. 2013. “INTRODUCTION to the ROMAN WEDDING: TWO CASE STUDIES.” Classical Journal 109 (2): 223–32. https://doi.org/10.1353/tcj.2013.0004.
5: HERSCH, KAREN KLAIBER. 2013. “INTRODUCTION to the ROMAN WEDDING: TWO CASE STUDIES.” Classical Journal 109 (2): 223–32. https://doi.org/10.1353/tcj.2013.0004.
6: Hersch, Karen K. 2010. The Roman Wedding : Ritual and Meaning in Antiquity. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.
7: Howard, Vicki. 2003. “A ‘Real Man’s Ring’: Gender and the Invention of Tradition.” Journal of Social History 36 (4): 837–56. https://www.jstor.org/stable/pdf/3790353.pdf?refreqid=excelsior%3A054a950d58261a8c4372ea87f6feae4b&ab_segments=0%2Fbasic_search_gsv2%2Fcontrol&origin=&initiator=&acceptTC=1.
8: Seaton, Beverly. 1995. The Language of Flowers : A History. Charlottesville, Virginia: University Press Of Virginia.
9: Chesser, Barbara Jo. 1980. “Analysis of Wedding Rituals: An Attempt to Make Weddings More Meaningful.” Family Relations 29 (2): 204–9. https://doi.org/10.2307/584073.
10: Chesser, Barbara Jo. 1980. “Analysis of Wedding Rituals: An Attempt to Make Weddings More Meaningful.” Family Relations 29 (2): 204–9. https://doi.org/10.2307/584073.
11: Brooke Blower, "Being Single" History 303: Sex, Love, Family: Relationships is Recent American History and Pop Culture (class lecture, Boston University, Boston, MA, March 21, 2023).
12: Montemayor, Cristina. 2020. “Everything You Need to Know about the Bouquet Toss.” Brides. 2020. https://www.brides.com/bouquet-toss-5077200#:~:text=The%20tradition%20of%20the%20bouquet,bride%20on%20her%20wedding%20day..
13: Penner, Barbara. 2004. “‘A Vision of Love and Luxury.’” Winterthur Portfolio 39 (1): 1–20. https://doi.org/10.1086/431007.
14: Nelson, E. Charles. 2023. “VICTORIAN ROYAL WEDDING FLOWERS: ORANGE, MYRTLE, and the APOTHEOSIS of WHITE HEATHER on JSTOR.” Jstor.org. 2023. https://www.jstor.org/stable/27821599?searchText=history+of+wedding+bouquets&searchUri=%2Faction%2FdoBasicSearch%3FQuery%3Dhistory%2Bof%2Bwedding%2Bbouquets&ab_segments=0%2Fbasic_search_gsv2%2Fcontrol&refreqid=fastly-default%3Af40f84b77afa4e24e2b6d09282c807ed.
15: Nelson, E. Charles. 2023. “VICTORIAN ROYAL WEDDING FLOWERS: ORANGE, MYRTLE, and the APOTHEOSIS of WHITE HEATHER on JSTOR.” Jstor.org. 2023.
16: Nelson, E. Charles. 2023. “VICTORIAN ROYAL WEDDING FLOWERS: ORANGE, MYRTLE, and the APOTHEOSIS of WHITE HEATHER on JSTOR.” Jstor.org. 2023.
17: Nelson, E. Charles. 2023. “VICTORIAN ROYAL WEDDING FLOWERS: ORANGE, MYRTLE, and the APOTHEOSIS of WHITE HEATHER on JSTOR.” Jstor.org. 2023.
18: Nelson, E. Charles. 2023. “VICTORIAN ROYAL WEDDING FLOWERS: ORANGE, MYRTLE, and the APOTHEOSIS of WHITE HEATHER on JSTOR.” Jstor.org. 2023.
19: View. 2018. “Queen Victoria and the Rise of the White Wedding Gown.” Women’s Museum of California. Women’s Museum of California. May 16, 2018. https://womensmuseum.wordpress.com/2018/05/16/queen-victoria-and-the-rise-of-the-white-wedding-gown/.
20: Domenico, Desirae M., and Karen H. Jones. 2007. “Career Aspirations of Women in the 20th Century.” Journal of Career and Technical Education 22 (2). https://doi.org/10.21061/jcte.v22i2.430.
21: Sharp, Elizabeth A., and Lawrence Ganong. 2011. “‘I’m a Loser, I’m Not Married, Let’s Just All Look at Me’: Ever-Single Women’s Perceptions of Their Social Environment.” Journal of Family Issues 32 (7): 956–80. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513x10392537.
22: Sharp, Elizabeth A., and Lawrence Ganong. 2011. “‘I’m a Loser, I’m Not Married, Let’s Just All Look at Me’: Ever-Single Women’s Perceptions of Their Social Environment.” Journal of Family Issues 32 (7): 956–80. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513x10392537.
23: Katherine, Resi. 2018. “Why I Didn’t Do a Bouquet Toss - Traditional Catholic . Modern Woman.” Traditional Catholic . Modern Woman. July 2018. https://youngmoderncatholic.com/2018/07/why-i-didnt-do-a-bouquet-toss/.
24: Eivans's Editor. 2021. “What to Do instead of the Bouquet Toss.” Eivan’s Photo Inc. | Wedding Photography & Video | Affordable Wedding Photo Video. February 7, 2021. https://www.eivans.com/blog/what-to-do-instead-of-the-bouquet-toss/.
25: Stewart, Martha. 2019. “Do You Need to Have a Bouquet Toss at Your Wedding?” Martha Stewart. 2019. https://www.marthastewart.com/7866652/skip-bouquet-toss-wedding-tradition.
Kaitlyn Dibbayawan was born in Thailand. She grew up with a nomadic life, always moving countries. Her first move was only 3 weeks old when she moved from Thailand to Switzerland. Then her life changed when she moved to Ecuador. Eventually, it was then decided to go back home to Thailand. After only 8 months back home she moved to New Zealand. She stayed here for 4 years picking up an accent only to move again to Shanghai for 2 years where she then lost her accent. Finally, she moved back to Thailand where she eventually settled down for 12 years. She is half Australian and half Thai. She has two brothers and eight dogs. She loves to travel and experience new cultures. She also loves dogs more than anything, especially her corgi.