livin on a prayer by peter

Clickhole: Sad News, Brits: The Royal Wedding Has Been Delayed Three Months To Give The Band More Time To Learn “Livin’ On A Prayer”

Anon #1: It's a complex modern masterpiece. I don't blame them.

Me: Idk if you're joking but it's certainly neither complex nor a masterpiece.

Anon #1: That's where you're wrong. The deft weaving of textures, the way it modulates at the end from E minor to G minor is the pinnacle of modern harmony. Deep yet simple. It's alright, I wouldn't expect a drummer to fully grasp the concepts at play here.

Me: Oh yeah go ahead, insult the most important member of the band lol

Anon #2: Only a drummer could think the drummer is the most important member of the band.

Me: It's always been my philosophy that there is no most important member of a band, but I'm just having a laugh and pissing off some easily butthurt folk.

Anon #1: I'm just sad that you don't see “Living on a Prayer” for what it is, the greatest piece of modern art. Jon Bon Jovi is a musical genius

Me: Cliff Burton's farts sounded better than the the best of Bon Jovi.

Anon #2: clearly the only way to settle this is for Cliff Burton and Jon Bon Jovi to go head-to-head live on stage to see who the better musician is.

My money's on Bon Jovi.

Me: Well Cliff is dead, but I'd suggest you listen to “Orion,” “Anesthesia (Pulling Teeth),” and “For Whom The Bell Tolls” to start.