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o do this, you need to learn how to counter all those fearful thoughts with rational ones. So, for example, if someone who's shy thinks "What if she rejects me?" whenever they think about going on a date, they need to teach themselves to reframe this thought as "It would suck if I got rejected but it would be no big deal." And even though you may not really believe this at first—that isn't something that can be fixed overnight—you'll still feel better because you're focusing on taking new actions rather than letting your anxiety control you.

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That's right—the more you act despite how you feel, the less intense your anxiety will be over time. And the less intense it is, the more comfortable you'll become with thinking about dating and meeting women in general. You just have to use that weakness as a way to build up your self-esteem by focusing on positive actions!


There are two specific techniques we can recommend using here: Mindfulness and Assertiveness Training. Let's go over each of these now so you know what tools to use when overcoming shyness or social anxiety…


Mindfulness Techniques for Building Self-Esteem & Overcoming Shyness

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Mindfulness is basically about training yourself to focus on what you're doing in the "now" rather than on what might happen later. It's about shifting your focus to thinking more about taking action now or simply experiencing what it feels like right now, which can help calm your mind and ease that anxiousness you experience whenever you think about dating or meeting women.


Mindfulness is something everyone can learn how to do but for some people, especially those who are shy, it may seem difficult at first because they're so used to focusing on potential negative outcomes associated with social situations. So if this is you, don't worry—just know that over time as you practice using mindfulness techniques, it will become easier not only to overcome fears of rejection but also turning those "mindful moments" into more confident ones.