Chapter I: Mannheim Several miners are working the night shift, extracting ore from the mine north of Bryn. A bright flash of energy blasts through the mine, killing several workers in a quick instant. Ardren Olmar, the elderly foreman, is standing near the entrance when it happens and wanders into the mine to search for survivors. Olmar stumbles his way to Bryn's central well the next morning and falls near several villagers. As a man and his son tend to Olmar, a village boy runs to Olmar's house, where his grandson, Jasper, is still asleep. Jasper quickly awakens and follows the messenger to the well. With the help of other villagers, he takes his grandfather home to rest in bed. Jasper tries to enter the mine to investigate what happened, but he is blocked by an energy barrier. He cannot advance any further without a way to dispel the forcefield. Knowing there is nothing else he can do, he sets out to find a means with which to save his grandfather. [Expand this portion.] Jasper heads through the tunnel that leads to the valley kingdom of Halvera. In there, all of his belongings are stolen from him while he takes a short nap. He is able to track down a young thief named Hockfin. [Expand this portion.] They emerge from the tunnel in the village of Halvera and soon encounter Jasper's merchant friend, Helmer, who makes a revelation about a nugget of hephestusite that Jasper's dead mother had hidden in the viking doll she made for him years ago. This nugget of ore is what lead to the deaths of Jasper's parents because they had learned of its incredible power and did not want it to fall into the wrong hands. Helmer knows a swordsmith who can forge the ore (alloyed with other metals) into a sword. This sword will have the power to dispel the energy barrier in Bryn. Eventually, party journeys back to Bryn to dispel the barrier at the mine. Deep inside the mine, the find a glowing figure hiding. They engage in battle. The party is too weak to inflict any serious damage. The glowing figure is blind and keeps missing attacks. Eventually the battle ends in a stalemate. Jasper confronts the glowing figure, who introduces himself as Hoedr. He explains to the party that he was tricked by the god Loki into killing his twin brother Baldur with a mistletoe-laced spear, Baldur's only weakness. Loki assisted in throwing the spear with Hoedr not knowing what he was doing. After the murder, Hoedr was on the run from condemnation, fearing death, with the other gods searching everywhere for him in their great anger. He hid in the mine. Thinking that the sounds he heard were the gods finding him, he tried to defend himself and killed the miners. Hoedr gave his sincerest apology to the party and offered to made mends by try healing with old man with whatever power he had. When they arrive to the house, the man is already dead. Hoedr, feeling sorry for directly and indirectly causing all the deaths, pledges to help the mortals by joining their team on a journey to turn himself in to the other gods and beg for the killings of mortals to stop. Hoedr needs to be lead to the other gods due to his blindness, which the party gladly does if it means saving lives. Soon afterwards, the team encounters a fishing village, Jarr, under attack by one of Loki's children. Hoedr asks for the massacre to stop. When the god refuses, Hoedr engages in battle of close combat. Hoedr grabs the sword from Jasper and uncontrollably swings it. By chance, the sword hits the god, absorbing his powers and resulting in near instantaneous death. Hoedr feels strengthened and claims to notice faint light with his eyes. A fisherman approaches the party to thank them for saving the village. He offers to cook them dinner with his day's catch and provide lodging for the night. When they explain that they are heading to Elfheim in the morning, he offers to provide them with an old sailboat to assist on their journey. The next morning, the party departs toward Elfheim. Just as they can see the island at the edge of the horizon, storm clouds start to gather, and waves splash against the hull. The dreaded sea beast Jormungandr crests above the water and draws upon a whirlpool. The party enters battle. Overwhelmed with the monster's power, they are rendered unconscious, and the boat is thrown off-course. Hoedr, unable to see in the dark weather, is helpless. Chapter II: Elfheim The party awakens to the sounds of fog horns. They have reached a great sea fortress of Kolga. The massive fortress gate opens, and their boat is grappled inside. The gate shuts behind them. Inside the fortress, the ship runs aground. The party is greeted by who appears to be the mayor. [Expand outline] They begin discussing tales of a sea monster, Jormungandr. Apparently the monster has been swallowing fishing boats whole, and no warrior has ever been able to leave a scratch on the serpent. The beast is blocking the party's travel to Elfheim, so they must either find an alternate course to find some way to defeat the beast. [Expand outline] The party eventually lands at Elfheim, dredging a large amount of water in the now unseaworthy boat. They survived... but just barely. |
Please post comments here on storyline ideas. I will expand the above plot based on ideas.
on the way of finding the sword he encounters more allies? is that any good?
Remember that this will be a very long game, so we can span out party joinings. I've like over 100 levels. This summary covers maybe 4.
I'm having writer's block. If anyone has ideas to follow the intro, feel free to add notes after my text.
[expand this portion 1] The old man, Magus, tells Jasper of a sword that is holy, and powerful enough to break all spells. This sword is called Gram] hope this helps!
[expand this portion 2] The villager that becomes an ally, Hockfin, had his sister killed by the gods in their hunt. that is his motive. He is a thief by class, and you meet him when he steals all of your gear in the inn (make some way to make the player HAVE to go to the inn, like, you know how games are)] hope this helped too!
[expand this portion 3] on their way to the portal to reach the gods, they find the city aflame... the god inflicting torment on the townspeople is Brono, son of Baldur (the guy Hoedr killed) and hoedr's nephew. Hoedr didnt know who it was, and this drives him mad. (and the new found power makes him crazier and more power hungry)] yes! i smell something rotten in that guy, lol.
Interesting... I'll work some of those ideas into the story.
i think...maybe Halvera can be the place where you meet Magus, and it can be on fire when the party and hoedr go there again. Then after Brono is killed, you speak to Magus again (then I'll leave the rest alone until more story is added so i can add to it. i dont want to make too much storyline...i might be trespassing on some1 elses grounds maybe)
I guess I should read what you have since I have no clue who Brono and Magus are. :D By the way, Magus is of Latin origin.
[expand this portion 4] The sea monster is Jormungand. The midgard serpent. Apparently the monster has been swallowing fishing boats whole, and no warrior has ever been able to leave a scratch on the serpent. The team needs to get across the sea, however, to search for the gods.(i need more plot to expand any further)
I just added some of your sea monster text into the main story. Also, I like scripts 4 and 5. 3 needs a little work with dialog. Helmer seems to be stating too much that he shouldn't really know.
Much better!
ko0l i liked p-6 the most!
thx taco. im working on p-7 currently, its also pretty lengthy...
We need some work on P7. I think I messed up in a few areas of my summary, to I'll give some corrections here then explain what I'd like to see (just my opinions)...
Baldur is Hoedr's twin brother. Loki, the trickster god, is jealous of Baldur, who is a friend to all. As the story goes, all the other gods loved Baldur so much that they went through the world to get everything to promise it could never hurt Baldur. They felt that the mistletoe was such a weak plant that they never made it promise, so it became Baldur's only weakness, and Loki knew this. Baldur would entertain the other gods by allowing them to shoot him with arrows, and everyone knew that arrows could not hurt him. Well, Loki had other ideas...
Loki gave Hoedr a spear with a mistletoe attached to the tip. Hoedr, being blind, did not notice the mistletoe or even know of its power. Loki guided Hoedr's arm to throw the spear at Baldur. It hit Baldur's heart, killing him. For this, Odin had Hoedr hunted down and eventually killed. Loki was also condemned by escaped at the Ragnarok.
From what we have developed so far in the story, Hoedr breaks from this story when he accidentally uses the sword to absorb the magic of the other god. It may be interesting to say that this sword comes from a different mythology that interfered with Norse predestination of the gods.
Here's what I envision for the scene of Baldur's death:
1. Loki chuckles while coming from behind a bush/tree near Hoedr, who is alone. Baldur has a crowd around him in the background.
2. Loki leans to Hoedr's ear, telling his plan for Hoedr.
3. Loki holds a spear in Hoedr's hand, helping to aim it.
4. The spear quickly zip across the scene with motion blur.
5. Baldur holds his chest in pain with a spear in it.
6. A crowd encircles a fallen Baldur.
I picture 6 frames of animation, which can be scrolled and have several lines of text appear under them. Let me know what you think.
Here's some info on each of the gods in the story...
Hoedr - http://www.pantheon.org/articles/h/hod.html
Baldur - http://www.pantheon.org/articles/b/balder.html
Loki - http://www.pantheon.org/articles/l/loki.html
looks great! i was gonna try my hand at this, but it looks like you beat me to it :D ur awesome at directing. i'll try. it would help if i had some concept art on everyone mentioned, so it fits into the game and dosnt look tacky. unless you just want me to invent their image outright in the cutscenes.
I'll see what I can dig up.
bravo on P-7 Soul! though, u might not c this for a while...
sry on not TMJ-ing for a while. Heres a new script. P8
P9 too
The sea monster will be Joermungandr.
alright. Jormungandr
lol. look at my [expand this portion 4] up above XD from forever ago >.<
HULL!!! good stuff! =D finally read your novelization. Its epic, great detail!
I've updated the outline to more closely reflect the novelization. The main change reflects the switch of the story from a search for a legendary sword to the discovery of hephestusite and its magical ability. The section between Jasper's departure from Bryn to Jasper and Hockfin entering Halvera needs to be filled in. I'm not sure if Jasper should journey to Berit on the way or not.
I just uploaded the third revision of Chapter 1. The section near the end is in early form. Also, as mentioned in my previous post, I need to figure out Jasper's first stop after leaving Bryn.
I've started working on the chapter 2 outline. Suggestions are welcome because I am hitting writer's block.
CHAPTER TWO! where is the continent? I mean, what is the continent? Atlantis :O jk but that would be cool sometime >.> myths of atlantis or as the norse called "Thule" exist in mythology. The whole thing about aryans and stuff came from norse mythology. Lots of interesting history behind it. I watched a show on history channel called "Hitler and the occult" and it had a lot of norse things in it (i guess since germany os nordic) but yeah. It was pretty weird and informative.
-___- still cant look up the chapter at school. wont let me view on site or download. (which are the only choices of viewing) i think i'll try to get on my laptop today after shool.
ok, i read the new parts on the story. elfheim and such, sounds pretty good :D and the entire party is still together, right? thats good, and the meeting with Brenda? Is there anything on this? Could I help with that portion?
I haven't fully built out the story with Brenda yet. When she joins the party, it will be Jasper and Hockfin with Hoedr tagging along.
Alright, I'll just wait to hear from you, when the time comes. Do you think you could post the base doll that kefka is using for the sprites on here?
Is he using a template image? If he is, I may want to build some of the Sakari frames from it.
oh, im just assuming that he is, seeing as how all of the sprites has the same basic structure. I'll ask him about it. It may just be his style that makes it look that way. And will the sakari be as large as humans or TMJ humanoids? It looks that way, just making sure ^^
Why not say that the Sea Serpent was put there by the gods to devour ships to find Hoedr.
In the battle, none of the party members can inflict much damage. After Hoedr is knocked off board, Jasper jumps in after to save him (because Hovkfin would sink in his armor). Hockfin eventually finds the courage to jump into the Serpent's mouth, while Jasper shouts something like "No! Don't do it!", and manages to kill it by peircing it in the roof of its mouth, which is directly below the brain. As Jasper gets Hoedr back on board, the serpents sinks below the sea, its mouth shut after it was stabbed. Jasper watches anxiously for Hockfin and starts to get sad (maybe cry, even) when Hockfin doesn't appear. But then Hockfin floats to the surface, barely unconcious and with semi-serious teeth marks on his leg from when the monster closed its jaws (his leg never fully recovers), and mentions something about the monster's bad breath. He then faints and is pulled on board, where Jasper and Hoedr then sail to Elfinheim (sorry if I spelled something wrong/ couldn't remember the monster's name's spelling)
Interesting ideas. I could probably work some of those into the story.
That reminds me that I need to finish chapter 1, too.