Maroon

{Introduction.Introjection} 

She always said I was quieter than the rest.
They would discuss their interests, talk about picture box shows and jest over simple things.
Watching them reminded me of nature documentaries viewed in my fathers presence showing a gathering of tatty desert hyenas biting tough skin from the corpse of a zebra or slain Impala antelope. Obviously the fallen animal would be a metaphorical representation of the subject they were discussing at the noted time, completely irrelevant of course but somehow important to me. Studying the simplicity of their conversations, the way the words would just fall from their mouths and a discussion would form, almost blooming for them, left me feeling envious and obscure, yet at the same time completely repulsed. The conversation would die a drawn death like the last tinges of red on a tampon or the final breath of relief exiting a torture victims shredded lungs, then I would step in.
Introducing myself as any random name, box of cigarettes and cheap plastic lighter in one hand, a stomach churning brightly coloured cocktail in the other, the lengths I must go to for a good night out.

Approaching a table of women as a straight man is suicide from the start.
Accentuate movement and vocal patterns?
Dance like a flaccid penis on a running machine?
Get these things down and your on the guest list with an all access pass and a fluorescent orange badge that says 'tell me your innermost secrets while your licking my balls and I'm fucking your underage sister'.
Pushing through the evening pretending to know what they are talking about is the hard part, trying not to focus on just one but making sure you maintain interest in all of them, even the disgusting one who no one likes but she managed to find a way of tagging along, bring her into the conversation as much as possible, make them all feel warmed by your presence. It makes no difference which one of them takes your interest, they are all just bitch-meat and bones.
When you go to the toilet make a point of leaving your car keys, wallet and phone in plain sight. In your wallet a healthy wad of cash and a picture of you with your family. They will check.
Make sure while on your visit to the bathroom you give them a little extra time to check your bait over thoroughly. This will work wonders for you later in the evening. Remember, we are trying to earn their trust here, not make them wet.

................Coming.

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