PLUS SIZE BATHING SUITS
OR HOW I GAVE UP PERFECTION AND LEARNED TO LOVE....NO......ACCEPT PLUS SIZE BATHING SUITS
I know nothing of plus size bathing suits. I have never owned one, never worn one. In fact, I'm a guy. The only plus size suits I have had contact with are those I've seen at the beach, or the surfer jams I wore to the beach in my teens.Those may or may not count, you decide.
So why am I broaching the subject? Other than the fact that we should be able to discuss all but the most personal subjects with each other, I have a point.
When I was growing up and into those teen years I mentioned, going to the beach in the summer was a wonderful time. I am older now and skin cancer, sun sensitivity from medications and the loss of joy at frying on the sand have left the beach a decidedly infrequent destination for me. My wife enjoys it still though. Anyway, in those younger years we would very frequently visit the beach. Don't worry, I am getting to the plus size bathing suit issue.
We would inevitably splash around in the surf for awhile then retire to the sand to rest up for the next round. you would naturally look around at the other beach goers around you, making your assessments. Being a red blooded male, I would take notice of the fairer sex. Usually there were quite a few attractive females to ogle. They would be there in their skimpy two piece suits, driving me crazy. I don't know how guys control themselves these days.
And then there would be the other groups of beach goers. I maybe wasn't quite as interested in them, but I
did notice. They were the MOMS with their kids. They would plop down on the sand and she would commence to slathering on copious amounts of Coppertone on their white bodies.
Here it comes. And those same MOMS would inevitably be wearing one of two things. I honestly don't remember one of those MOMS wearing a hot little bikini. They would show up with huge umbrellas wearing either a brightly colored Mu mu or the ubiquitous ..... plus size bathing suit. You've all seen them, I'm sure. All kinds of ruffling, pleating, blousing and bunching just to draw the eye away from those decidedly imperfect figures. And the colors.... every sort of floral, rainbow or pattern to distract.
I'm sure I wasn't kind. After all, they were not the tanned, lithe fair-haired beauties I was there to stare at and admire. These were just ordinary women. Ordinary.
I am at least three decades from those days. I myself have not turned out to be a bronzed Adonis. I am ...well..a little ordinary. I have the requisite gut to deal with and a physique which slowly deflates.
To those MOMS, I say, "I am sorry I looked at you that way". Moms have a very hard job I now know. Looking after children can be stressing and maybe their figures were a ways down the priority line.
But those suits WERE ugly. I don't think they had much of a choice then. Suits now are so much better. I guess the designers finally decided to maybe spend just a few minutes designing for real women with real figures instead of windblown waifs. Check this out, I'll wait.
At least those Moms were out there. We're all ordinary. To those ordinary Moms wanting to go out to the beach today, I say find one of the new plus size bathing suits and enjoy life and your kids.
If you see one of those punks like I was, ignore him, he'll grow up.