F P Q   (frequently pondered questions)

the answers to the questions you didn't ask... in no particular order

  • No, my last name isn't "French", and no, I'm not French (there is a minor smidgen of heritage from there, but essentially I'm a WASP).  "Mr.French" is just a nom de 'Net derived from a nickname bestowed by a work colleague back in 1991 (based on a wedding photo wherein I bear some resemblance to the so-named character created by Sebastian Cabot on the old TV series "A Family Affair").
  • Yes, I'm a registered Democrat - though many are the times I wonder why  (that sentiment is due mostly to my feeling that they put way too little effort into standing up to right wing nonsense. Form a third party, anyone?)
  • Yes, I'm a liberal. 
  • No, I don't hate America. 
  • No, I don't hate the troops.
  • No, I don't hate Republicans (though I wonder what's wrong with so damned many of them, why they believe the crap they're fed by the NeoCons, Faux News and the rest of the right-wing echo chamber).
  • Yes, I intensely disliked the Bush Administration, and still have little use for them, their cronies, cheerleaders, apologists and sycophants, as well as the NeoConservative movement, especially the "Project for a New American Century" crowd.  I think the whole lot was and still is hellbent on destroying my country.  Bush and Cheney were not leaders, they were misleaders.
  • However - despite all I just said, I try my damnedest not to hate anyone.  There are a number I could do without, but I just want them to go away and not destroy my world (or my kids').
  • Speaking of kids: I have two bright, intelligent, handsome teenage sons.  I'm divorced from their mom (it was her idea to leave, her idea to divorce; I had no interest in fighting it, and welcomed the settlement).  The young'uns lived with me for the first two years after the separation in summer 2003; now they live with her.  I'm very proud of the time I spent being a full time at-home father (hey, it's not often a WASP gets to be part of a minority).  It formed a bond between my sons and me that will never be undone; they and I formed a family of three.
  •  I also have a PseudoDaughter - a lovely Hungarian woman who came into our lives in 1997 as an eighteen-year-old exchange student.  She was and is incredibly intelligent, sweet, talented, and sharp-witted.  She's still living and thriving in Hungary, married, and as of late 2009 she upgraded me to a PseudoGrandfather, and has repeated that feat with pseudograndbaby #2 as of March 2012. 
  • More on the mother of my sons, my second wife - we were co-workers, starting in 1987.  A friendship developed, then a romantic involvement...  Over the ensuing years we lived together, married, moved to the Poconos, spawned, changed and/or developed careers, started to grow apart, and... well, stuff happens. (There are more of my opinions and observations on the dismantling of our marriage scattered on the Internet; links may appear here at some future date)
  • My first wife and I also were co-workers, dating back to 1979.  Again, what began as friendship turned to romance; we toured the country together (theatrical stuff), lived together, broke apart, reunited, broke apart again, reunited again ... and shortly thereafter she was diagnosed with cancer. Despite the health issues, we married a few months later...  but less than three months shy of our first anniversary, she was gone, taken down by the disease.  I've been without her since September 1988, and still I miss her - a lot.  (See my music pages for more on that topic; also, there's more I've written, but the texts need a new blog home)
  • Original birth family: I'm the third of three kids.  Both my parents are gone; my father died from cancer when I was seventeen, my mother from natural causes nearly 26 years later.  My older sister, creator of three terrific now-adult children, lives many miles away with her husband (and all-around pretty nice guy).  Our other sister, a literal and self-psychoprofiled "middle child," and a wonderful, intelligent, witty and special woman, passed away in 1994, also thanks to cancer.  It still feels odd to me that I've outlived an older sibling... 
  • Other immediate family members (non-human division): two kittens, born in August 2009 (?) - Spudnik (m) and Skittrina (f).  Since 1978, I've lived with a number of cats, seventeen in all (peak simultaneous feline load: six), and two dogs.  I've had enough canine companions for this lifetime, thanks... but I doubt I'll ever be sans feline for long.
  • My location in Pennsylvania?  Not far from the Delaware River, in the Lehigh Valley.  If the exact town or address matters to you, e-mail me.
  • Music - yes, love it (see the other pages devoted to it); it's a major part of my life, though I'm really picky as to what I'll listen to (for details, see the separate music pages on this site).  Twice upon a time, I made an attempt at being a musician (guitarist) in two different bands, once in the mid-70s, the other in the mid-80s.  However - I haven't played in public (or much in private, for that matter) since a memorial I held in 1988 for my then-recently departed first wife; thereafter, I just lost the drive.
  • Religion - no, thanks.  Call me a non-believer, a Secular Humanist, or an atheist, whichever you prefer.  I do think there's an as yet unquantifiable connection among all things in the universe.  If you insist on calling that "god", that's your choice; I won't.
  • No, I don't smoke.  Not intentionally, anyway. 
  • Yes, I drink alcohol from time to time.  Preferences include beer and ale (preferably dark and brooding, somewhat like me. "Lite beer" is pointless, it's the same product at both ends of the digestive system.  Most commercial beer - Bud, Miller, et al - is flavorless colored seltzer.  And keep Coors the hell away from me; if I want Nazis in my life, I'll seek 'em out); wine (red, please, and not out of a box nor produced by Gallo or other low-budget mass-production "vineyards"); Champagne (from Champagne - the area in France); vodka (not the budget-priced paint thinner variety); margaritas (salt; rocks or straight up, please; and you did use real limes, right?); Grand Marnier (straight up).
  • Coffee's a daily requirement: black, strong, dark roast, arabica, preferably organic. Espresso's perfectly acceptable.  Iced is a frequent afternoon/evening indulgence.  There are other options that I will consider, too; depends on the day.
  • Sports I follow?  Simple answer: none.  Professional sports don't do a thing for me (I'm proud to say I've never watched a Super Bowl game).  The only sports I follow are those in which my kids are involved.  (note: occasionally I make exceptions to this rule.  Sometimes I find Olympic sports interesting, particularly gymnastics and skating; but as with most everything on television, it's unfortunate that the TV networks appear to find it necessary to edit the actual competitions down to meager highlights and fill the time with mini-docubiographies and other "human interest" heartstrings-tugging glop)
  • Sports I play?  Nothing of an organized, league kind... though I will participate in "indoor sports" (use your imagination).  Also, I'll join my kids in shooting a few baskets, playing volleyball or whatever, and I do enjoy a game of pool from time to time.