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And the Fives of the Tarot
(c) 2007 G. Estevez
My son is 14 today. While the rest of the world goes to work, Jesse and I rise early and head for the beach at Treasure Island. It is summer in Florida, and we welcome the scattered showers in the forecast. As we stake our claim to a few square feet of sand, the morning sun directs its rays through the moisture in the air and an almost tangible rainbow arches above the water in the west. Silvery-winged terns drop into the waves, chattering and feeding on the small fish below. I pick up a small piece of driftwood that rests well in my hand, and see in an instant that it is not mine. “Jesse, do you need a new wand? It’s your birthday – this must be our favorite beach’s gift to you.” He turns it over and over, salt and sand sparkling between the crevices in this new driftwood wand. “Yes, I guess it is,” he smiles. The universe sings, “Happy Birthday, Jesse,” and we laugh. He walks toward the water – didn’t he run toward it just a season ago? He steps over the harvest of seaweed deposited on the shore from this morning’s tide, and disappears inch by inch into the warmth of the Gulf. He has outgrown those swim trunks, I think to myself. I also think of everything else that he is outgrowing and growing beyond. I think of the changes to come and catch my breath. So often, we fear change. Yet, the cycle of life is motion and change. I know of no God or Goddess of stagnancy. And so, I ask God/Goddess/All There Is only for the wisdom to accept each change as it comes … to understand the cycles great and small so that I may be guided, and guide Jesse, as gently as I can through the changes. Numerologically, Jesse’s age of 14 breaks down to a 5 (1 + 4 = 5). The Tarot’s Minor Arcana Fives often feel painful, fearful, or full of remorse and sorrow, as they reflect our own unwillingness to let go and allow the changes that would occur naturally and without so much angst if we would only stop fighting. The five of Fire is passion at its breaking point – we burn the candle at both ends; we are on the brink of exploding or imploding because we can no longer contain this burning desire or rage. Yet, we could also contain that inner fire and channel it carefully and lovingly into the world, allowing our light to shine for all. The five of Water, so often associated with broken relationships akin to divorce, is telling us that even our hearts and promises are sometimes outgrown. We may respond in sorrow and anger, or we may rebuild our relationships (old and new) to allow for even more love and less constriction. The five of Air seems so full of fight and fear, and yet, here is our opportunity to think outside of the box, face our fears and learn how others think and live. And the five of Earth may remind us of all that we have lost and how poor we now feel, or we may choose to be reminded of what is truly important in this mundane world. These same lessons of the number Five – which I personally call my “Oh, no, not another learning experience” number – seem so different from the perspective of the Major Arcana. The Heirophant (V) is both teacher and student, engaged in the change that occurs when knowledge is transmitted to or through us. We break down old thought patterns and beliefs, making way for higher concepts – ideas to grow into when we have outgrown the old ones. Temperance (XIV), our alchemical angel, kicks up the heat, burning off all that is no longer necessary in the crucible of this material world, again asking us to let go of that which no longer serves us. And then, holding our distilled essence in one cup, fills another cup from the true Source, and begins mixing, blending and balancing a new Self … a changed Self … a stronger Self ... a truer Self. It is Temperance – Major Arcana’s alchemical angel at 14 – that I welcome most this year. As Jesse walks toward the depth of his adult years, and the child he was slips away by inches … well, what Mom wouldn’t want an angel overseeing that delicate process? Speaking of changes, only a couple of hours have passed, and the weather has changed. No more showers, no more rainbow. The sun is downright hot. We roll up our towels, fold our chairs, and as we turn our backs to the water, the Universe whispers, “Happy Birthday, Jesse … today and every day.” |