April 25, 2007

List o' Things 

Call NYU and beg for money; decide on school and notify schools accordingly... within the next three days; decide when to go to Korea (Yeah, you heard me. Korea.); buy ticket to Jeju; get attendance record from school; finish writing two 1000-word essays by next Tuesday; extend visa from May 3rd to May 15 (my six months is almost up!); inform my students of my impending departure; go to Korea and come back; enjoy my remaining time in Taiwan.

Today, I came home to find a message on my computer screen from someone I care about. It went something like this: "I love you for being who you are and I appreciate you." I love things like that. 

Well, you make me smile with my heart.

12am edit: I just talked to you. I am sorry that I didn't know what to say. I wish I were better at it, but I know it wouldn't matter because there isn't anything I could say that would be of any use. My heart is with you. In that house. With you while yours is with her.

April 21, 2007

Running Out

Andy left yesterday. It's starting to hit me that my time here is running out. Not sure how I feel about this. 

Weather's been good. Getting really hot. Had one gorgeous day a couple days ago that reminded me of LA. It made me happy. Broke the clip of my Shuffle, but it didn't matter. It still played the perfect mix. Found my way into an awkward situation, but it didn't matter either. Found my way out by playing the perfect card. It was beautiful and I was happy. I am happy. I feel like I'm starting to settle. But I feel like I need to prepare to be uprooted.

LA will be beautiful like this all the time. 

I'm going to miss the rarity of this.

As Greg Rubinson said, Onward!

April 16, 2007

Who Needs Kissing Anyway? 

... Well, I do, but check it out: Chocolate rocks my world. And it can rock yours, too. God, I love chocolate. 

The article says that chocolate beats a kiss, but chocolate followed by a kiss probably beats chocolate by itself, don't you think? Yum.

Um, so... I might be going to Columbia. We'll see. The decision MUST be made by May 1st. Joy's future will be decided within the next two weeks. Stay tuned!

April 12, 2007

Where's the Music? 

T: before i go to sleep: only a fool would take NYU over columbia!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I change my mind. I'm pissed that someone stole my iPod. Today was such a gorgeous gorgeous day, after a week of miserable miserable days. It would have been so awesome to listen to some U2 while walking through campus. Sun, breeze, blue skies, Beautiful Day. Fuck, I need my iPod.

Forecast for tomorrow: the return of miserable. 

I'm gonna get me one of those one gig tiny clippy iPod Shuffles.

April 11, 2007

Meiyou Music 

Someone stole my iPod out of my bag at the night market. I would be pissed, but, what's the point.

Sad sad sad sad sad pants.

Joy is down.

April 6, 2007

And Back in L.A....

Lisa: I put a widget world clock on my desktop... just for Taiwan.

God, I miss you, L.A.

Jocelynne's plane leaves in 29 minutes. I'll bet she's already boarded. We had a dinner party of sorts a few hours ago. It was something we'd been saying we'd do for the longest time, but neglected to do until the last possible moment, when Hanvey and Joce decided to haphazardly throw one together so that we could get in one last meeting with Joce before she headed home. (That last sentence was atrocious, I know. I've been reading Lynne Truss's Eats, Shoots and Leaves and I'm becoming increasingly self-conscious about things like my comma usage and my tendency to write super long sentences, but not quite self-conscious enough to make any changes quite yet. Have you noticed? So... yeah, deal with it a bit longer. I've still got another 100 pages or so left of the book.) Hanvey makes a mean curry. I ate too much.

I love you. I love love you. I wonder how long it'll be 'til I say that to someone.

People are getting married. People I know, who I've grown up with, who are my age, are getting married. When the hell did we enter the age of marriage? I'm still waiting to go back to school. What happened? Have I fallen behind somewhere? Everywhere I look,  people are getting engaged and falling in love and making plans to move to foreign countries with their new significant others to live and love and shit. WTF? I'm sitting here so grateful to be able to enjoy someone in this moment without having to worry about having a serious talk about the future of the relationship. Practicality must be learned, I think. (Or maybe it's because I haven't found the One... *PUKE!*)

Oh, I feel a disclaimer is necessary here. I recognize that I am at a different stage in life than many of my friends. But, though I no longer wear my heart on my sleeve, I think that it's wonderful that that is where you have yours. I am an advocate of life experiences. Go ahead and love love love it up all over the world. You'll learn a lot. You'll feel a lot. And however it ends up, you'll grow a lot. I hope you'll be able to take all that you can out of the situation. And for you who are ready to settle down, I think that I am a jaded individual when it comes to situations like this, but truthfully, I've known you a long while and somehow, I have complete and utter faith in you and your love. Love can be such a bitch bitch bitch. But for you, I think it's decided to be nice. For you, I believe Forever is within reach. 

Oh, Life. There are also those around me who are only now discovering themselves. Come out to me. Come out , come out! The world is waiting!

Back to LA. I can hardly wait. I know Joce will get home in 12 hours and will be missing Taiwan, but I am a bit jealous. So much to look forward to at home! There will be friends, there will be family, there will be a night filled with booze and chocolate baked goods, there will be avocados (I can't stop talking about the avocados, eh?), and there will be basketball. NSU tourney in June! I am very excited.

Well-Rested

I just got 10.5 hours of sleep. I honestly can't remember the last time I'd gotten a full night's sleep. God, I feel great.

It's 9 a.m. on the Friday after Tomb Sweeping Day. We got today off because we got yesterday off, but we don't really get today off, because we have to make up for it next Saturday. You gotta love the Taiwanese. At least the gym is open. That's where I'm headed upon completion of this post.

I've decided to place sleep higher on my list of priorities. I predict that my health and quality of life can be greatly improved if I keep up the good sleep. I'll let you know how that goes.

Joce leaves at midnight tonight. I haven't seen as much of her recently. She's been preoccupied. I judge not! Anyway, I really hope I get to see her before she takes off tonight. Whatever happens, I'll be back in LA in a couple of months and we'll be reunited and we'll have left our attachments on this little island and we'll frolic, just the girls again, in a world that includes Hollywood and Trader Joe's and Regina. (Will we be detached by then? That I don't know, and though I might have an idea of the answer, I refuse to share here.)

Off to the gym!

April 5, 2007

Fatigue

It wears at me. It’s been wearing at me. It was barely noticeable in days previous, but it collects to a tipping point and then it tips. It’s tipped.

I can’t sustain. I tried, but it’s impractical. It’s implausible. It’s not smart. I am a smart person. I should know better.

I know that I should just let go, should just crawl into the warmth and let everything fall away from me so that I will be left unfettered and so blissfully unaware of all. Just for a good eight or nine hours. It has been so long since I’ve gotten a good eight or nine hours. I’ll go for a full ten.

Why do I persist? It is not smart to persist. I am a smart person. I will fall. It is early still, but I will let go now.

I will feel better in the morning.

 

April 2, 2007

On Top of Life

What's it mean when the worst part of your life is having to choose a law school from a list of some of the best law schools in the nation? Well, simply put, it means you rock at life, so quit your crying and enjoy said life before law school inevitably takes it away.

Three nights ago, something temporarily pushed ahead of Law School Decision 2007 to claim the title of Worst Part of Joy's Life. I was woken up by the sound of a mosquito buzzing around my face after it had bitten me. On the eyelid. It had never ever occurred to me that something like that would ever happen. Wasn't in the realm of things imaginable. It's maybe one of the worst things that could happen to a person without actually being all that bad. I looked pretty ridiculous though. I don't know how it managed, but it also got me between the toes. Now there's a parasite with a sense of humor. I can't help but to admire it a little.