INTRODUCTION

At the outset of the previous chapter we explained that perfect physical health was impossible without a corresponding mental health; that consummate soundness and vigor physically was only the reward of those who were consummately sane and buoyant mentally. How are you going to attain this wholesome state of mind? The simplest way, and probably the only way, is to cast aside every unwholesome thought as it arises and substitute for it a cheerful, tender, or holy one. Refuse to let your mind dwell on unpleasant or bitter ideas. If this is difficult, get a hobby, or two, or three, which will demand so much of your attention that you will not have time to think about the gloomy things of life. Get rid of the unhealthy ideas by crowding them out. The hobbies, of course, should accomplish some kindly or friendly purpose, or be of a joyful or benevolent nature; so that when your mind is occupied with your hobbies you will automatically be thinking kindly, friendly, joyful and hopeful thoughts. These are the character builders, the electric conceptions which, when combined with physical vigor, make a personality magnetic.

But the physical benefit is by no means the only benefit of healthy thinking, as will be seen upon a
reconsideration of our analysis of feminine charm in chapter III. AMELIA AND DERUCHETTE WERE
CERTAINLY NOT CREATURES OF HATE, GLOOM, AND SUSPICION; THEIR SENTIMENTS WERE OF THE CLEAN AND WHOLESOME KIND. THEY SHED JOY AROUND, RADIATED HAPPINESS; THEY WERE VIVACIOUS, PLAYFUL, THE VERY SPIRITS OF GRACE AND HARMONY; THEY WERE POSSESSED WITH THE MOST HONEST GOOD HUMOR, AND HAD KINDLY, SMILING, TENDER AND GENEROUS HEARTS. They could not possibly have been such winsome adorables had not their thoughts been as clean and wholesome as their persons. They could not have attracted in the least had they been irritable, resentful, envious, spiteful, sullen, or unkind. If your thoughts are unhealthy, you will be a contradiction and a fraud if you endeavor to act the part of Amelia and Deruchette…Without healthy thinking, therefore, you cannot hope to have a lovable personality.

Be sure, therefore, that your character responds charmingly to everything about you, and your face, your voice, and your manner will do likewise.

This does not mean that all good women are necessarily beautiful women. There are many good women who simply will not dress their hair properly, or wear becoming clothes, or take care of their complexions; others who will find occasion for gloom in everything that happens; and still others who seem indifferent or stupid. But isn't this lack of pride, this pessimism, and this selfish indifference to others, a flaw in their characters?...THE REALLY BEAUTIFUL CHARACTER, THE KIND THAT CREATES AN IMPRESSION OF PHYSICAL LOVELINESS, MUST, IN ADDITION TO BEING MERELY GOOD, BE CHEERFUL, TENDER, REFINED, SYMPATHETIC AND PROUD. Beauty of character embraces a little more than mere goodness of character.

BODY

How to Acquire a Beautiful Character.

Do not fear that the attainment of such a character is beyond the realms of possibility. You can acquire a beautiful character in the same manner that you would acquire any other accomplishment. What would you do if you wanted to become a good pianist, tennis player, elocutionist, or athlete. You would exercise and practice. You are going to acquire a lovely character in the same way-by exercise and practice. If you practice sincerely and persistently, you are bound to succeed.

You must not think, however, that you can be charming on some occasions and unlovely on others. You cannot have a Sunday manner and an every-day one. Once you begin the exercise of a charming character, you ought to stick to it every minute of the day, every day in the week. If you don't, the fraud will be quickly detected, and the purpose you have in mind will remain unaccomplished. If you insist upon keeping a skeleton in your closet, it is bound to rattle occasionally and betray your insincerity. However well satisfied you are with your artfulness, a shade of hardness will flit across your eyes, a grating tone creep now and then into your voice, or a cruel line appear at the corner of your mouth. The betrayal may be only momentary, but it will be unmistakable. Your practicing of a lovely character, therefore, is going to be continuous; the following being merely suggestions as to where and how to go about it.

What you are now going to do is to provide yourself with that hobby we mentioned in the beginning of this chapter, the hobby that is to exclude your unwholesome thoughts. This hobby, we determined, was to be of a friendly, joyful and hopeful nature, in order to arouse automatically in you a train of kindly and happy thoughts. What could do this better than some game that, while giving happiness to others, could be thoroughly and constantly enjoyed by yourself?

Play This Enjoyable Game.

The game will consist in learning to wind everybody in your family about your little finger, learning to make all of your household dote upon you to such an extent that you can just about do as you please with them. This is a difficult accomplishment, of course, and one or two of the family may be exceedingly stubborn; but the harder the fight the more enjoyable the victory.

As it is almost impossible to get enough young men to practice on, you will practice the game on the family first. After you enjoy a few victories there, after you have won the heart of every single one of them, then you are ready to practice upon others.

CONCLUSION

Perhaps the best beginning is to smile your sweetest, most alluring smile at the first member of your family that looks at you… Try, if possible, to put sincerity into the smile by thinking at the same time of something true and likable about the object of it… The smile need not be a broad grin, by any means; it may be confined almost entirely to the eyes, except for the natural softening of the lines about the mouth that accompany smiling eyes.

THE NEXT STEP IN THE GAME IS FINDING SOMETHING APPRECIATIVE TO SAY THAT WILL EITHER CHEER, CODDLE, OR FLATTER THE FIRST MEMBER OF THE HOUSEHOLD YOU MEET… The thing you say must not be funny or clever, however; it should merely indicate that you understand the character of this member of your house hold, that you genuinely sympathize with his hopes and ambitions, and that you sincerely appreciate the biggest and truest things about him.

You can't begin to play it until you have studied carefully the character of the person to be played upon, and have persuaded yourself that the little defects are outweighed three to one by the good qualities. FIND OUT, IN EVERY CASE, WHAT THESE GOOD QUALITIES ARE, AND THEN LET THE PERSON KNOW THAT YOU KNOW AND APPRECIATE THIS BEST SIDE OF HIM. THE THING TO BE APPRECIATED IS NOT THE THING DONE OR THE WORD SAID, BUT THE CHARACTER OF THE PERSON WHO DOES OR SAYS IT. And the appreciation must not be direct flattery; your actions and your manner should be such that the appreciation is inferred rather than expressed. That makes it appear sincere.

Not long ago, you will remember, we found that genuine beauty was attainable only through beauty of
character, and that this beauty of character consisted in being cheerful, tender, refined, sympathetic and proud…There is nothing better, more cheering, more refined and sympathetic, than searching for the good qualities in everyone you meet and showing your appreciation of them. You can't do this and remain a pessimist; you can't do this and continue envious, sulky, or cynical. Those inveterate betrayers of character, your lips and eyes, will quickly take on a new tenderness, a new softness and sweetness, that will improve your facial beauty incalculably. The hard expression about the mouth and the indifferent glint about the eyes will vanish far more certainly and permanently than if you had submitted to treatment by a beauty specialist. Your voice and your manner will lose their harshness, indifference, or timidity. If supplemented by a wholesome self-respect and a pride in your appearance that will insist always on showing yourself at your best, the effect will be as perfect as you can humanly make it. In addition, the sane and buoyant thinking thus indulged in will promote your health and give you a magnetic personality.

HW ASSIGNMENT

Due by midnight, Wednesday, August 5, 2009.  Please email me your "name" and assignment number to 1Femmy@gmail.com.  Thank you. 

1.       What makes a personality magnetic?

2.       What are the 6 ways of thinking unhealthily that prevent one from having a loveable personality?  Memorize.

3.       Fill in: “Be sure that your character responds ___________________to everything about you, and your_________, your __________, and your ______________will do likewise.

4.       What is the 1^st step of The Game?

5.       Before you can play the 2^nd step of The Game, what must you persuade yourself? Explain the second step thoroughly.

6.       Beauty of character consists in being _____________, ____________, _____________, ______________ and _______________. Explain thoroughly how these qualities will create genuine beauty in the person who practices The Game.