INTRODUCTION

How to Attract the Man's Attention. 

Apparently, then, in attracting the attention of men, the third main characteristic, the desire to act the part of man and hero, is the most important. If you wish to attract a man's attention, the thing to do is to give him an opportunity to play the part of the superior and mighty male, to play a little game in which you are the frail and tender woman and he is the mighty and able hero who comes to her rescue. This little game, even when both the man and the woman knows it is only in play and not in earnest, is a source of constant delight to men.

The Manners That Focus Attention.

Though it is desirable that you thus develop yourself until you naturally attract attention without effort, there are a few things which you can do consciously to help matters along. If a man happens to be rough in clasping your hand, look at him with a reproachful glance, and wring your fingers, to remind him what a tender thing a woman's hand is. If you find him staring at you, don't stare back boldly, but act confused and modest, to remind him what a sensitive creature a woman is as contrasted with his own bold and daring, if rude, character. If you have met an acquaintance upon the street, you may act more or less timorous and undecided, so that he will feel the necessity of offering you his manly guidance. If you are at a picnic, you may act horrified at the prospect of soiling your dainty clothes by sitting on the ground, so that some man or other feels constrained to find a newspaper for you to sit on. The difference in such a situation between an attractive girl and an unattractive one, is that the unattractive girl would find her own newspaper without any fuss, while the attractive one would never think of finding the newspaper for herself until after a man had already done so for her. The attractive girl is a constant appeal for help, for guidance, and for protection. Her eyes are always appealing to some man or other to help her innocence in its manifold difficulties. She never directly asks for help; but she is so apparently helpless in every situation that not only men are impelled to offer aid, but even her businesslike but less attractive sisters feel impelled to offer it. The latter feel the same indulgent superiority toward her that a man feels, but they do not enjoy that feeling of superiority as the man does. A man never scorns the frailty and helplessness of woman, because he enjoys too much the contrast it brings out between her weakness and his strength.

Making the Most of a Picnic.

If you are on a picnic of any kind, follow the plan suggested in the foregoing paragraph. Don't sit down and expect to gain any attention by mere gossip. Don't stay in one spot, and give the men no chance to help you. Get yourself into one predicament after another where you can reasonably expect a man to offer his help. Giving his manly aid and guidance is the only thing he very much enjoys. Collect a group together to go adventuring, and then use every opportunity to let the men show their superior strength, agility, daring, and above all, their ability to make light of the things that frighten you.

BODY

Do You Know How to Be Teased? 

Men are usually fond of teasing the ladies. This characteristic of theirs affords many opportunities for attracting their attention. The girl who can be teased and teased, and responds only with indifference, boredom, or by turning the tables on the men themselves, is missing her best chance. That sort of conduct doesn't make the man feel superior, or stronger, or abler, or bolder. It makes him feel futile, inefficient; it might even make him feel as if he were no match for a woman; and that sort of feeling is not agreeable. The girl who inspires it is repulsive to him, no matter how attractive she may be in appearance. The genuinely clever girl will affect to be utterly dismayed by the teasing, will bite her lip in helplessness, or rage and stamp her foot in impotence; until the men take pity on her utter helplessness. It is again a case of beauty in distress. A man will naturally try to help her, to comfort her, to repair the injury to her delicate feelings; and everything he does in this direction only serves to bring home to him the contrast between this frail creature and his own rude, rough, and bearlike self.

At the Dance.

Dress being the only thing likely to attract attention, they devote a great deal of study to their toilettes, the dressing of their hair, and to their gowns. Naturally, the gown must be as dainty and fragile, as soft and delicate as can be, so as to convey the impression that those are the qualities of the wearer herself. Neither in the manner or in the appearance of the woman must there be any touch of severity, of strength, of efficiency, ability, or sodden indifference… There is nothing to prevent your looking the part of a tenderly feminine adorable, even though you have little chance of acting the part. If you use judgment and taste, as well as your newly acquired understanding of men's main characteristics, in preparing for the occasion, you have a great opportunity to attract attention by your appearance alone, without the aid of definite action on your part.

At the Theater, Afternoon Tea, Etc.

Simply act the part of Angela Human, as outlined in chapter VII and VIII… Having practiced considerable at home, you will not now find it difficult to play the part of Angela Human, and to play it with sincerity. You can act this part on the ballroom floor, at an afternoon tea, at the theater, or at a reception… Seize, on the contrary, every opportunity to emphasize the character you are assuming… Continue until playing the part of Angela Human becomes second nature to you. When that point is reached, you can depend upon the man to do the rest, whether you are his partner at a dance, his associate in a business office, his fellow-worshipper at church, or fellow-student at college.

CONCLUSION

Thus far we have taken for granted that the third characteristic of man, the desire to act or feel the part of man and hero, is the quality to which you must appeal in attracting attention. Sometimes, however, attention may be attracted by appealing to the first characteristic, the craving for sympathetic understanding.

Two Important Rules.

The first rule of attracting attention through the craving for appreciation is to get the man to talk about himself. Most men will, if only given half a chance The second rule is, after he has begun talking, to appreciate the man who is thus expressing himself… The first rule needs little discussion here. A mere question or two about a man's business, or his aspirations, or a suggestion that you know something about what he is doing, or that you suspect him of having some big and daring venture up his sleeve, will usually lead him to talk a little about himself… Then, no matter what little he says, you must look for something which you can appreciate… A MAN WILL NEVER BE DISAPPOINTED IF YOU INDICATE SUBTLY THAT YOU HAVE GREAT EXPECTATIONS SO FAR AS HE IS CONCERNED. We shall not go into detail on this subject here, however, because it will have to be discussed fully in the next chapter, which deals with the principles of arousing and maintaining interest.

HW ASSIGNMENT 12

Chapter Twelve Making Men Notice You.

Due midnight, Wednesday, September 23, 2009.

Please email me your answers with the assignment number to 1Femmy@gmail.com.  Thank you. 

1.       If a man happens to be rough in clasping your hand, _ _ _.

2.       If you find him staring at you, _ _ _.

3.       If you have met an acquaintance on the street, _ _ _ .

4.       If you are at a picnic, you may act _ _ _.

5.       What is the difference between the attractive girl and the unattractive girl in Q4?

6.       Since an attractive girl would never directly ask for help, what would she do?

7.       How do her businesslike sisters react to her apparent helplessness?

8.       Name at least three things you could do to make the most out of a picnic.

9.       What is the principle behind the fondness of men teasing the ladies?

10.   Name the three wrong ways to respond to teasing.

11.   Name the four right ways to respond to teasing.

12.   Since one cannot have the aid of definite action at a dance, where should the emphasis be displayed?

13.   Once playing the part of Angela/Human has become second nature to you, “you can depend upon the man to do the rest, whether you are his ________________, his _________________, his _________________, or __________________.

14.   What are the two rules of attracting attention that appeal to their craving for sympathetic understanding?