Dating
Dating is one of the cornerstones in life. Every person in the world grown up thinking about what the person they marry will be like. It all starts through dating. We all grow up with our own values and morals and therefore, establish our own standards and rules for dating. Understanding the “do’s and don’ts” for a relationship are essential to a successful experience. Everyone has standards for who they choose to date. Some of these standards are set by parents and some have no standards. Most parents “pressure [daughters] to date men from higher socioeconomic backgrounds, while sons were slightly more to have been encouraged to date attractive people,” (Saxbe 2003). Setting your own standards is important in finding what you want in a partner. Knowing when to do something or not to keeps us from making simple mistakes but, “here’s the truth: You will make some mistakes,” (Stafford 2005).
“Honestly there’s no cut-and-dry way to date,” (Stafford 2005). We’ve all know about the rules to dating and the standards that should be followed but are there really any rules to guide us? “Every human interaction and relationship is different,”(Stafford 2005). It’s true; no two people are the same which is a recipe for conflicts with every new partner. Each time you change a partner, there is always a period of time when you must get to know each other and learn everything about that person. Perhaps, because this is a fact, then maybe it is possible that there are no rules that apply to dating. If everyone is different then how would someone have universal rules to use? So as a parent, what would one do to inform their children about dating the proper way? There are many things that a teenager and a parent should know and understand before dating. “It is normal for a teen to be interested in dating,” (Witmer 2007). As children grow up they will naturally be interested in dating and for any person it’s normal. One of the responsibilities of being a parent would be talking to their teens to lay down the foundation that they need to know what information they can use to date. First, “teenagers do not know how to date,” (Witmer 2007). They are not taught inside a classroom and what they do know they have probably learned through hear-say. Parents should talk to their teens about dating. “Teens whose parents talk to them about dating are better prepared and happier,” (Witmer 2007). In addition, “your teen will need privacy,” (Witmer 2007). Even though it is important to be informed about a child’s life; privacy is still an issue and must be up held. A teen might feel neglected to his parents if he feels that they are violating their privacy. But, in the end the most significant thing to remember is “your teen will still need you to be around,” (Witmer 2007). Letting a teen know that as a parent that you will always be there for them is huge. Giving them security is the best attribute that you can offer them. Now that it is understood what to know before dating; what should you know while dating? The rules are simple and for the most part they are common sense. Being respectful, being honest, being loyal and trustworthy are some of the simplest rules to dating. Being polite and acting with appropriate manners with behavior that speaks for itself are key to success. There is no need to go into extreme detail with rules because it becomes complicated and unnecessary. The basic principals to dating are to follow your values and morals and hope for best. Just remember, they are plenty of fish in the sea. Saxabe, D. Sep. 2003. “Rule #1 For Dating My Daughter: Earn Big Bucks..” Psychology
Stafford, T. June 2005. “Love, Sex & Real Life.” Campus Life. 63.9 p. 58 Witmer, D. 2007. “Teens and Dating.” About.com: Parenting of Adolescents. January 23, 2008, from http://parentingteens.about.com/od/teenculture/a/teen_dating.htm |