The Lone Ranger was captured by Indians, who wanted to execute him immediately but tribal custom did not allow for it, as it was the Feast of The Harvest Moon. Any captives would have three free nights with one wish each night, and then be killed. The first night the chief called out the captive for his first wish. He wanted to talk to his horse, Silver, alone. The chief stood back and they brought Silver over to his tent, the Lone Ranger whispered something in his ear and the horse took off at a gallop. Two hours later he came back and a beautiful stunning blond slid out of the saddle, walked into the tent and spent the night with the Lone Ranger. The second night he had the same wish, the horse was brought over, he whispered something, three hours later a ravishing brunette appears in the saddle, climbs down, spends the night with the Lone Ranger. The third night comes, he wishes to speak to his horse, alone again. He takes him by both ears, stares into his eyes and says listen to me, for the last time, bring POSSE.
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."
There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."
People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
You should not confuse your career with your life.
Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
Never lick a steak knife.
The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.
You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.
You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.
The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above-average drivers.
A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)
Your friends love you anyway.
Thought for the day: Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.
01..After the Lone Ranger saved the day and rode off into the sunset, the grateful citizens would ask, Who was that masked man? Invariably, someone would answer, I don't know, but he left this behind. What did he leave behind?________________. 02. When the Beatles first came to the U.S. In early 1964, we all watched them on The _______________ Show. 03 'Get your kicks, __________________.' 04. 'The story you are about to see is true. The names have been changed to ___________________.' 05. 'In the jungle, the mighty jungle, ________________.' 06. After the Twist,The Mashed Potato, and the Watusi, we 'danced' under a stick that was lowered as low as we could go in a dance called the '_____________.' 07. 'N_E_S_T_L_E_S', Nestle's makes the very best . . . _______________.' 08. Satchmo was America 's 'Ambassador of Goodwill.' Our parents shared this great jazz trumpet player with us. His name was _________________. 09. What takes a licking and keeps on ticking? _______________ 10. Red Skelton's hobo character was named __________________ and Red always ended his television show by saying, 'Good Night,and '________ ________.'
11. Some Americans who protested the Vietnam War did so by burning their______________. 12. The cute little car with the engine in the back and the trunk in the front was called the VW. What other names did it go by? ____________ & _______________. 13. In 1971, singer Don MacLean sang a song about, 'the day the music died. 'This was a tribute to ___________________. 14. We can remember the first satellite placed into orbit. The Russians did it. It was called ___________________.
15 . One of the big fads of the late 50's and 60's was a large plastic ring that we twirled around our waist. It was called t
================================================= ANSWERS : 01. The Lone Ranger left behind a silver bullet. 02. The Ed Sullivan Show 03. On Route 66 04. To protect the innocent. 05. The Lion Sleeps Tonight 06. The limbo 07. Chocolate 08. Louis Armstrong 09. The Timex watch 10. Freddy, TheFreeloader and 'Good Night and God Bless.' 11. Draft cards (Bras were also burned. Not flags, as some have guessed) 12. Beetle or Bug 13 Buddy Holly 14. Sputnik 15. Hoola-hoop
Last Tuesday, as President Obama got off the helicopter in front of the White House, he was carrying a baby piglet under each arm.
The squared away Marine guard snapped to attention, saluted, and said "Nice pigs, sir".
The President replied: "These are not pigs...these are authentic Arkansas Razorback Hogs. I got one for Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, and I got one for Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi."
The squared away Marine again snapped to attention, saluted, and said "Excellent trade, sir!"
The author and I have talked a few times, Gy Sgt Will Price. He is at 8th and I, probably will end up going out to Pendleton at some point as his next duty station, but he loves to hear from the "old timers".
The most beautifully WRITTEN book I have ever read is The Red Badge Of Courage by Stephen Crane, who, although he was never in a battle, accurately captured what battle was like, according to Civil War veterans who read his book. There are two different versions, the first has the hero of the book learning to be a man at the end, and the original version shows the "Youth" to have learned nothing at all from all his experiences in war. He remains the same selfish self-centered young man he was before his first battle, even after all he's seen.
It is, above all, a psychological portrait of a young recruit under fire.
It is not the original version that Crane wrote, although that is available from some publishers. Most copies on the shelves of bookstores are not the original Red Badge of Courage as Crane wrote it.
That is not the original version. Here is the same version.
Appleton Publishing cut out 10,000 words, quite arbitrarily, and they made it come close to being a very different novel, not just an abridged version.: http://xroads.virginia.edu/~HYPER/CRANE/badge.html
What I like about it is the choice of words throughout the novel. The characters in the novel are all from farms and other rural areas of New York State, and their dialect is down home, but the narrator talks in a stilted way, and chooses short sentences that are very different, such as: "He had prepared certain sentences that he thought could be used with touching effect". "The moon had risen and was hung in a treetop". "There was a darker girl who seemed sad at the sight of his brass and buttons".
"When told of the hordes of hungry bewiskered Southerners on the march, he pictured the live red bones sticking through slits in the faded uniforms".
This is scenic, a webcam showing (live) Peggy's Cove Light in Nova Scotia: Scroll down and RESET it from 10 seconds to 2 seconds to get an almost live view, 24 hours a day.
I did not write this, nor do I know who did. Someone sent it in to me.
"ESPRIT DE CORPS"
Ask a Marine what's so special about the Marines and the answer would be "Esprit de Corps", an unhelpful French phrase that means exactly what it looks like - the spirit of the Corps, but what is that spirit and where does it come from? The Marine Corps is the only branch of the U.S. Armed Forces that recruits people specifically to fight.
The Army emphasizes personal development (an Army of One); the Navy promises fun (let the journey begin); the Air Force offers security, (its a great way of life). Missing from all the advertisements is the hard fact that a soldier's lot is to suffer and perhaps to die for his people, and take lives at the risk of his/her own. Even the thematic music of the services reflects this evasion.
The Army's Caisson Song describes a pleasant country outing. Over hill and dale, lacking only a picnic basket. Anchors Aweigh, the Navy's celebration of the joys of sailing and exotic liberty, could have been penned by Jimmy Buffet. The Air Force song is a lyric poem of blue skies and engine thrust. All is joyful, invigorating, and safe.
There are no land mines in the dales nor snipers behind the hills, no submarines or cruise missiles threaten the ocean jaunt, no bandits are lurking in the wild blue yonder.
The Marine Hymn, by contrast, is, all combat. 'We fight our Country's battles; First to fight for right and freedom; we have fought in every clime and place where we could take a gun, in many a strife we have fought for life and never lost our nerve.'
The choice is made clear. You may join the Army to go to adventure training, or join the Navy to go to Bangkok, or join the Air Force to go to computer school.
You join the Marine Corps to go to War! But the mere act of signing the enlistment contract confers no status in the Corps.
The Army recruit is told from his first minute in uniform that "you're in the Army now", soldier. The Navy and Air Force enlistees are sailors or airmen as soon as they get off bus at the training center.
The new arrival at Marine Corps boot camp is called a recruit, or worse, but never a MARINE. Not yet, maybe never. He or she must earn the right to claim the title of UNITED STATES MARINE, and failure returns you to civilian life without hesitation or ceremony.
Recruit Platoon 2210 at San Diego, California trained from October through December of 1968. In Viet Nam the Marines were taking two hundred casualties a week, and the major rainy season operation Meade River, had not even begun. Yet Drill Instructors had no qualms about winnowing out almost a quarter of their 112 recruits, graduating eighty-one.
Note that this was post - enlistment attrition; every one of those who were dropped had been passed by the recruiters as fit for service. But they failed the test of Boot Camp, and not necessarily for physical reasons; at least two were outstanding high school athletes for whom the calisthenics and running were child's play. The cause of their failure was not in the biceps nor the legs, but in the spirit. They had lacked the will to endure the mental and emotional strain, so they would not be Marines. Heavy commitments and high casualties not withstanding, the Corps reserves the right to pick and choose.
History classes in boot camp? Stop a soldier on the street and ask him to name a battle of World War One. Pick a sailor at random to describe the epic fight of the Bon Homme Richard. Everyone has heard of McGuire Air Force Base. So ask any airman who Major Thomes McGuire was, what aircraft he flew,and why he is so commemorated.
I am not carping, and there is no sneer in this criticism. All of the services have glorious traditions, but no one teaches the young soldier, sailor or airman what his uniform means and why he should be proud of it. But ask a Marine about World War One, and you will hear of the wheat field at Belleau Wood and the courage of the Fourth Marine Brigade, fifth and sixth regiments.
Faced with an enemy of superior numbers entrenched in tangled forest undergrowth, the Marines received an order to attack that even the charitable cannot call ill - advised. It was insane. Artillery support was absent and air support had not yet been invented, so the Brigade charged German machine guns with only bayonets, grenades, and indomitable fighting spirit. A bandy-legged little barrel of a Gunnery Sergeant, Daniel J. Daly, rallied his company with a shout, "Come on you sons a bitches, do you want to live forever"?Aspiring Marine Corps recruits study this sitting on their locker boxes.
He took out three machine guns himself, and they would give him the Medal of Honor except for a technicality: he already had two of them. French liaison officers, hardened though they were by four years of trench bound slaughter, were shocked as the Marines charged across the open wheat field under a blazing sun directly into the teeth of enemy fire. Their action was anachronistic on the twentieth- century battlefield; so much so that they might as well have been swinging cutlasses. But the enemy was only human; they could not stand up to this. So the Marines took Belleau Wood. The Germans called them "Dogs from the Devil."
Every Marine knows this story and dozens more. We are taught them in boot camp as a regular part of the curriculum. Every Marine will always be taught them! You can learn to don a gas mask anytime, even on the plane in route to the war zone, but before you can wear the Eagle Globe & Anchor and claim the title it must be ingrained in you to know about the Marines who made that emblem and title meaningful. So long as you can march and shoot and revere the legacy of the Corps, you can take your place in line. And that line is unified spirit as in purpose.
A soldier wears branch of service insignia on his collar, metal shoulder pins and cloth sleeve patches to identify his unit. Sailors wear a rating badge that identifies what they do for the Navy. Marines wear only the Eagle, Globe, and Anchor, together with personal ribbons and their CHERISHED marksmanship badges. There is nothing on a Marine's uniform to indicate what he or she does, nor what unit the Marine belongs to. You cannot tell by looking at a Marine whether you are seeing a truck driver, a computer programmer, or a machine gunner. The Corps explains this as a security measure to conceal the identity and location of units, but the Marines' penchant for publicity makes that the least likely of explanations. No, the Marine is amorphous, even anonymous, by conscious design.
Every Marine is a rifleman first and foremost, a Marine first, last and always! Yes- even Marine Corps aviators .You may serve a four-year enlistment or even a twenty plus year career without seeing action, but if the word is given you'll charge across that Wheat field! Whether a Marine has been schooled in automated supply, automotive mechanics, or aviation electronics, is immaterial. Those things are secondary - the Corps does them because it must. The modern battlefield requires the technical appliances, and since the enemy has them, so do we, but no Marine boasts mastery of them. Our pride is in our marksmanship, our discipline, and our membership in a fraternity of courage and sacrifice."
For the honor of the fallen, for the glory of the dead", Edar Guest wrote of Belleau Wood, "the living line of courage kept the faith and moved ahead." They are all gone now, those Marines who made a French farmer's little Wheat field into one of the most enduring of Marine Corps legends. Many of them did not survive the day, and eight long decades have claimed the rest. But their actions are immortal. The Corps remembers them and honors what they did, and so they live forever. Dan Daly's shouted challenge takes on its true meaning - if you lie in the trenches you may survive for now, but someday you will die and no one will care. If you charge the guns you may die in the next two minutes, but you will be one of the immortals.
All Marines die; some in the red flash of battle, some in the white cold of the nursing home. In the vigor of youth or the infirmity of age, all will eventually die. But the Marine Corps lives on. Every Marine who ever lived is living still - in the Marines who claim the title today.
It is that sense of belonging to something that will outlive your own mortality, which gives people a light to live by and a flame to mark their passing.
A preacher was late for a graveside service somewhere in rural Georgia. Becoming desperate, he threw aside the map and just started following directions given to him along the way by passersby. Finally he came to a gravel road, took a left, and headed down it, hoping to find the family gathering, late as he was. Speeding down the road, he eventually came to a large hole in the ground, which was surrounded by people just looking idly down into it, parked his car and hurried over to the scene. He pulled off his wide-brimmed hat and got a little prayer book out of his coat pocket, fumbled with it a little, then began intoning the funeral service for the deceased. All listened with deep respect and some even wiped away a tear And this crowd was a rough one, all dressed in work clothes and dusty and dirty clothing. When the preacher was finished, he looked around at the crowd of some twenty men, bowed a little, gave a little half-smile, and made his way back to the car, pleased that he at least had made it to the service without being too late.
After he pulled away, one of the men nudged the other and said "Hey, Jake, did you ever see anythin' like THAT?"
Old Jake wiped the sweat off his forehead and looked at him and said, "Naw, never did. An' I been puttin' in septic tanks for going on twenty years now".
OLDIES FANS.--- MAY OF 1960 BROUGHT OUT THE SONG "IMAGE OF A GIRL" BY THE SAFARIS, (NOT THE SURFARIS WITH WIPEOUT). NOW, THIS VIDEO WAS TAKEN IN THE BASEMENT OF THE WRITER OF THE SONG, MARV ROSENBERG, JUST TWO YEARS AGO. HE IS THE SECOND FROM THE RIGHT, AND THE LEAD SINGER, JIMMY STEPHENS, IS ON THE FAR RIGHT. I WAS IN CONTACT WTITH MARV ROSENBERG RECENTLY BY EMAIL, AS WELL AS WITH THE DAUGHTER OF ONE OF THE OTHER ORIGINAL MEMBERS--- IN MY OPINION, THESE GUYS STILL HAVE IT.
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: -Knowing when to come in out of the rain; - Why the early bird gets the worm; - Life isn't always fair; - and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers:
I Know My Rights I Want It Now Someone Else Is To Blame I'm A Victim
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars; but have to check when you say the paint is still wet?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?'
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
And my FAVORITE...... The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.
