Obituary for Fried de Metz Herman Frieda de Metz Herman passed away peacefully in the early morning of January 13th 2010, at her hom  facility where she had lived for the past 18 months. She is remembered for her many talents and achievements, above all her wonderful dance compositions accompanied by her exhortations that her students strive to dance beautifully–with skill, and with heart! Fried was born on November 13th 1926, in Amsterdam, The Netherlands. The second of two daughters, she had a happy childhood within her close-knit family, although they experienced extreme deprivation and anxiety during World War II. She first encountered folk dancing in 1942, when she was in her mid-teens. In wartime Europe, life was gloomy and difficult, but Fried discovered that, when she could dance, she felt her spirits lifted. Thereafter she sought out dancing wherever she went—it became a lifelong passion. After the war ended, Fried pursued a career as a teacher, following in her sister’s footsteps. Her life as a schoolteacher in The Netherlands (elementary school using Montessori method, 1947-1954; English language teacher 1955-1960) was interspersed with trips to England—to dance, to listen, to learn. During an Easter dance course in 1949, Fried encountered the magnificent musician, composer, choreographer, and teacher Pat Shaw when he came to The Netherlands to teach English dances. His insistence on high standards of dancing combined with equal doses of enjoyment strongly impressed Fried; in later years, when she herself became a teacher of dance, she vigorously upheld his standards. Eager to learn English (a language forbidden during the war), Fried took an opportunity during one summer vacation to work as an “au pair” in England to improve her skill in the language. In 1954 she gave up her teaching job in The Netherlands and moved to England. For money, she took a day-job in a department store in London—it helped her attain a better grasp of the language. The rest of her time she spent dancing! In 1955 she returned to The Netherlands and took another teaching job—this time teaching English. In 1961 she gave up that teaching job and moved to England. This time she earned her keep where she lived, at Daphne Evans’ rooming house, Abernethy House, in Hampstead, where Pat Shaw was renting a room. Fried worked there as a housekeeper, but she also found plenty of time to dance and to assist Pat, listening to him, mending his clothes, etc. Describing him to others later, she said, “Pat was wonderful; he was like an exotic bird of paradise!” In 1962 Fried traveled to America to visit her sister and brother-in-law, a physicist and expert in soil dehydration, who were living in Utah. She stayed for several months, touring around the country. She liked what she saw and was favorably impressed by the welcome she encountered. The following year, Fried immigrated, and the state of New York became her new home. Without missing a beat, Fried jumped in and became a regular attendee of the Country Dance & Song Society’s dance series in Manhattan. In those days programs embraced not only English country dancing, but also contra, morris, and sword. The Society’s director May Gadd included Fried in the demo/display team, partnering her to dance with Al Herman. Fried and Al performed at many locales, including the World’s Fair in Flushing Meadows during 1964-1965. Fried de Metz and Al Herman were married on the 29th of May 1965, and settled in Larchmont, New York, where they lived happily for the following 40 years. In 1974 Fried and Al, along with Christine and Ed Helwig, Phil Merrill, and several other friends, founded the Country Dancers of Westchester in order to dance English and American dances in their local county. The Westchester group is still going strong now, 36 years later. Its weekly dances feature live music and clear teaching. Fried’s “ease and elegance” style of dancing is evident, and her compositions are often danced there. Fried de Metz Herman published eight books. The first, appearing in 1980, was the Pinewoods Fund Collection, which contained dances written by numbers of people, including seven by Fried. Sales of the book helped raise money to support Pinewoods Camp. That initial publication was followed by The Road to Ruin (1984); The Naked Truth (1986); Choice Morsels (1989); Potters’ Porch (1992); Ease & Elegance (1995); and Fringe Benefits (1999). In 2009 Fried’s final book, Serendipity, appeared. It includes a wealth of information and advice from Fried, as well as instructions for 84 dances! Fried’s compositions are artful, varied, and inventive. Inspired by music, people, and events, they reflect her vision and skill in choreography. With the assistance of pianist Leah Barkan and dancer friends meeting at Potters’ Porch, Fried was able to see her choreography “danced out loud” from the words, ideas, and intentions she conveyed to those dancing. These sessions helped her to put her choreography into written form for publication. For twenty years, from 1987 to 2007, Fried’s friends and associates held an annual invitation-only event at the community center in Lenox, Massachusetts. This was the “Fried-for-All”—a weekend of dance workshops, taught by Fried, for experienced dancers and for other teachers. In 1996 and in 2006, by popular demand of dancers on the west coast, she flew to Seattle and conducted “Fried-for-All” workshops there. During her last twenty years, Fried became well known for the dances she wrote and the “style” workshops she conducted, such as the Ease and Elegance series. She accepted dozens of teaching engagements around the U.S.A., in The Netherlands, and in Belgium, and made several grand tours in England, teaching at weekends, festivals, and clubs. In recognition of her work, in 2006 the Country Dance & Song Society honored Fried with their Lifetime Achievement Award, acknowledging her many contributions to the world of English country dancing. Not only did Fried love dancing, she also had a lifelong love of the natural world and was extremely caring and attentive to creatures and plants. After a potluck meal she would collect leftover food to take home and set out in a pan underneath a low table outdoors on her back patio. When darkness fell, she would keep a watchful eye from the window above the patio for the appearance of her “little darlings”—a family of raccoons that came to feed on the scraps Fried had set out for them. Fried is survived by her sister Noor, two nieces, and two great-nieces. Her beloved husband and faithful companion, Al Herman, passed away December 28th, 2003. Fried’s dances, her ideas, her admonishments, her encouragements, and her spirit—all are part of her legacy, living on in the memories of those who knew her and accessible to all in the books she published. Grateful, appreciative friends and students will continue to dance with skill and spirit, and to heed Fried’s plea for “no slipshod dancing!” Respecting Fried’s wishes, there will be no funeral. To honor Fried, her home dance group, the Country Dancers of Westchester, will hold a memorial to celebrate her life and to dance. Its date has not been set, but the event will be announced soon. All are invited to attend and are encouraged to send or bring their remembrances to share—and, of course, as Fried would wish, to dance!
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