When I think about being an artisan, I generally find that I create in a context or way that is familiar to me. So for this project, I wanted to stretch myself.

I wanted to find a way to express what I had been learning that was beyond what I had learnt intellectually. I wanted a process that engaged my mind, heart and emotions and how these parts of myself had entered into the learning experience. I also desired to give the Holy Spirit room to reveal deeper things to me, perhaps subconscious thoughts, as I was drawn to meditate on a particular part of worship history.

Here’s the disclaimer. I am not a painter, sketcher or some one who draws in their spare time. These things do not come to me naturally. So I recognised that drawing or choosing to paint something, would be a risk and a challenge. This would be out of my comfort zone but I also believed that it would perhaps allow me to discover something mysterious or unexpected.  I hoped that as I gave expression to a part of my brain and heart where my mind was not fully in charge, something surprising could emerge. 

I began my process by lighting a candle and worshiping God. As I did this, I found myself drawn to the different ways communion has been expressed over time. At times it has seemed distant and set apart and at times it has seemed intimate and near.

I became more aware through the worship history class of the different emphasizes and expressions that the Eucharist has had over the centuries. I was drawn to Communion as a memorial worship act and also as a mysterious sacramental experience. As I was meditating on these things surrounding communion, I just began to draw.  One of my close friends is an art therapist and she believes passionately that the Holy Spirit can meet us in art.  Before I began, I had talked with her about drawing something for my project and explained a little about what I hoped would happen. She helped me think through the process and suggested ways that I could respond to what I had drawn. She really encouraged me to draw out of a place to worship so that what happened wasn’t planned or premeditated.

As I began to draw, I tried to allow shapes and colours to dictate my movement rather than preconceived notions. I wondered if there was a way that God would speak to me through it and whether there was somehow a prophetic way that He would speak to me from the past, into the now and possibly alluding to the future.

Once I had finished drawing, I looked at what had emerged on the paper and wrote down the first 10 words that came to mind, responding to what I had drawn. I then wrote free hand, incorporating these 10 words.  As the process continued, I also found myself crafting a poem and a prayer. These were ways I found I could give voice to what I was perhaps expressing on paper.

It is amazing what happens as you allow yourself to access different parts of your brain and emotions. The drawing was an emotional experience for me. It felt like something was being birthed. It felt sorrowful and mournful to begin with and as I progressed over the hour or so, it became something much more hopeful.

Below is a JPG of what I drew and then the poetry and prayer that also emerged are in PDF format.

Dawn (essentialsworship@gmail.com)