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No one wants to believe they’re desperate. Everyone wants to believe that, regardless of public opinion or what the media says about them, they are so unique and so special and so unique and really just who can say whether they’re worth knowing?
And it is for this reason that we fly blind on the dating scene until we find someone we like enough — or something — to bring home. We wonder if we should be exclusive with our dates as soon as things start getting interesting. We wonder how quickly it would be appropriate to move in together after meeting each other’s parents after three months, but then put those thoughts aside because surely he wouldn’t want me if I was just another girl chasing him down at half the speed of light.
We’re afraid that we will be perceived as desperate — and he might think that, too — then we end up playing out the same story over and over again, giving in when someone starts to take us for granted. “Maybe I can change this time around,” we wonder. But sometimes it is only after the inevitable meeting with our friends post-breakup do we realize how ridiculous it all was; how much time we wasted trying to make something work that never had any chance of getting off the ground anyway because one party just wasn’t interested.
You don’t have to play a game if you aren’t ready for it…and you never should be.
__ You might say that we spend so much time justifying why this guy or that one didn’t work out because men are the gatekeepers to commitment, and as long as they don’t want anything else from us but our bodies , it is okay for us to keep bouncing from bedpost to bedpost. But you would be wrong, because a man doesn’t care about a woman how she cares about herself. He only sees what he wants when all is good and well between the two of them — if he can even pick up on those vibes in the first place.